we created memory foam but never considered there may be things the foam wishes to forget
i love nfl players who wear guardian caps bc: 1. they’re being safer and protecting against concussions 2. they kinda look like toad. like if this were mario football or something
i have to do it when i have to do it. before then it’s not time to do it yet
guys if we’re mutuals and you make an alt and follow me on it but it isn’t clear that it’s yours you need to dm me and tell me what’s up bc i don’t really pay attention to who follows me anymore
i’ll prolly end up watching a lot of the wolves this season. but don’t tell snakeroot
they just posted a job at work and the responsibilities are basically what i’ve been asked to do this quarter. but i don’t have the level of experience requested and it makes at least 2x my salary. so idk what im supposed to do with that
my brain detests the thought of working but is soooo amped about standing in front of the mirror and spiraling over my flaws
if i’m being honest i don’t think there’s any nl team that can handle the brewers this year
i’ve been sunbleaching a tennis ball for several months
entering my ‘lorelai gilmore periwinkle eyeshadow’ era
that was for sure a homer if it doesn’t hit the railing. bummer
[sadly and quietly to myself] is that the best you can do ?
starting a charity that teaches mlb players how to shape their beards
grichuk, pham, hicks… this white sox roster is 11.5% late 2010s cardinals
everything else i had to say was mean so that’s what you get from me
opened instagram and got jumpscared by a college friend modeling ethel cain’s new merch on her official account
ugh idk if i wanna be a pubkin. a fuckass jackoff lantern
not sure changing my pfp to be festive is worth you guys forgetting who i am like a dog who loses your scent and thinks you’re a stranger