A new episode of Autistic Stuff for Autistic People is out! In it, a few autistic friends talk about special interests, how they're often different from hobbies, and how they make us feel as autistic adults. After listening, let me know about your special interests. www.spreaker.com/episode/spec...

For my fellow AuDHD friends, how do you create momentum for larger projects? I've tried lists, schedules, creating challenges for myself, small rewards, figuring out my "why," and more. At the moment, the only thing that seems to work is to start my day with something I enjoy. What about you?

It took me almost a week to write about the celebration of a man by white evangelical Christians whose words violently targeted and marginalized so many groups of people (and were the exact opposite of the Jesus they preached). #WEC #hypocrisy open.substack.com/pub/discover...

The Death of Empathy

Hypocrisy Behind the Outpourings of Grief

open.substack.com

So excited! Another Autistic Stuff for Autistic People podcast episode dropped today. Join our chat about community - why it's important, how it's formed, some of the potential drawbacks, and even the benefits of non-human community. Let me know what you think! open.spotify.com/episode/5JR0...

Community

open.spotify.com

When Language is Used to Minimize When I started telling people about my autism, I heard several phrases that left me feeling small, invisible, and invalidated. Three years later I am starting to understand my feelings. What would you add to this list? open.substack.com/pub/discover...

When Language is Used to Minimize

Phrases that shape our perception of Autistic people

open.substack.com

Have you ever wondered about the difference between an autistic meltdown and a tantrum? They are not the same! If you're autistic, how do you experience meltdowns? What situations lead to meltdowns for you? open.spotify.com/episode/4I2S...

Meltdowns

open.spotify.com

Have you ever read an article or social media post and been enraged by the use of certain words or phrases that actually minimize the injustice or inaccurately shape people’s perceptions? In your opinion, what phrases are deliberately misleading? open.substack.com/pub/discover...

When Language is Used to Harm

Phrases that shape our perception and behaviour

open.substack.com

You might not think making decisions is a big deal. But for my AuDHD brain, oh boy. Dread. Check out my Substack this week to find out why. What about you? What's your decision-making process? And if it's easy for you, please help.... :) discoverclarity.substack.com/p/making-dec...

Making Decisions while AuDHD

Feeling Like I Can’t Trust Myself

discoverclarity.substack.com

Check out my new podcast if you or someone you love is autistic and want to learn more about understanding ourselves in a world not built for us. #autism #ADHD #podcast open.spotify.com/show/64LpLRK... @bestfirstchair.bsky.social @theautisticcoach.bsky.social

Autistic Stuff for Autistic People

Podcast · Fox And Raven Media · Autistic Stuff for Autistic People is a podcast in which autistic coaches Aradia, Cheryl, Patrice, and Matthew talk about their lived experiences and special interests....

open.spotify.com

I watched Season 2 of "Shiny, Happy People." It brought up a lot. If you have experienced spiritual abuse or if you love someone who has, this Substack will be insightful. #spiritalabuse #shinyhappypeople open.substack.com/pub/discover...

Growing up "Shiny and Happy", Part 2

Acquire the Fire, Evangelical Dogma, and Life Long Trauma

open.substack.com

I watched Season 2 of "Shiny, Happy People." And it brought up a lot. If you have experienced spiritual abuse or if you love someone who has, this Substack will be insightful. #spiritualabuse #autismacceptance open.substack.com/pub/discover...

Growing up "Shiny and Happy," Part 1

Acquire the Fire, Teen Mania, and “Dying to Self”

open.substack.com

I started a new thing. If you want to read about late discovered autism/ADHD, healing from spiritual abuse/high control religion, and gender equality and justice....do I have a Substack for you! #autism #genderequality #ADHD #spiritualabuse open.substack.com/pub/discover...

A Lifelong Passion

Understanding myself in a chaotic world

open.substack.com

For those of us who grew up in white evangelical Christianity, physical and mental health challenges are often met with “just pray” and “have more faith.” Since leaving high control religion, I have discovered many different definitions and approaches to healing. open.substack.com/pub/discover...

Healing in Unexpected Places

Opening my heart and mind

open.substack.com

I have officially reached the age where I can see how various events in my life that I thought were mistakes or bad situations actually led me to something better. It’s not so much about toxic positivity (“yay, everything hard is actually awesome”) but about seeing the larger connections.

I saw a video yesterday that talked about the importance of a “low-demand lifestyle” for a lot of autistic people. I’m trying to figure out where I can lower some of the external and internal demands that often weigh me down. I’m open to suggestions. What demands have you been able to drop?

BodyTalk is another approach to healing that has changed my life. It helps me identify the subconscious patterns, belief systems, thoughts, and emotionally charged memories that are negatively impacting me and allows me to release them. It puts the power to heal back in my hands.

I love exploring different spiritual and healing paths. Reflexology connects me to my body and the earth. Emotion Code helps me identify and release emotions that are trapped in my body. Yoga reminds me to breathe and that I am more than my thoughts. What helps you connect to your body and spirit?

When I first started healing from spiritual abuse, I was so angry. I felt robbed of my connection to my body, sense of self, joy, intuition, future. I was also angry that there was no “before” version of myself to reclaim or connect to. But she doesn’t exist. I can only love the me that exists now.

Spiritual abuse isn’t talked about enough. When religious leaders use their authority and interpretation of doctrine to control and instill fear, shame, and guilt, the impacts are often far-reaching. Survivors are left with invisible wounds that often take years to first understand and then heal.

Before I understood I’m AuDHD, I tried to follow advice geared to neurotypicals. “Do the hard stuff first.” “Do a little bit each day until it's done.” But now that I know how my brain works, I start with easy tasks and feel energized. I block time and hyperfocus on one thing until it’s done.

Since leaving high control religion and spiritual abuse, I have had a lot to heal. In my childhood, healing was only to be found in prayer, faith, and obedience. Nowadays, I am open to so many possibilities. Reiki, BodyTalk, Emotion Code, yoga, community, nature, Reflexology, have all been helpful.

A big part of my healing has been recognizing patterns from my childhood that are still playing out today. I chose a career (teaching) that expects unpaid mental and emotional labour. Did I (subconsciously) do this as a way to create the conditions of growing up the oldest daughter of six children?

Growing up in a high control religious environment can create debilitating shame, fear, guilt, anxiety, perfectionism, people pleasing, and difficulty making decisions. If you are a spiritual abuse survivor, what have you done to help yourself heal and move forward?

Since I've started spending time in neuro-affirming spaces with other autistic adults, I realized that many of my challenges connecting with people aren't because I'm bad at it. When I'm with other autistic people who "speak the same language" as I do, communication is often pretty simple.

For most of my life, I felt like I was too much and not enough at the same time. Learning I am autistic two years ago was the discovery that changed everything. My biggest success so far? Slowly replacing the ableist critic in my head with a much more compassionate voice.