Dealing with difficult people may be hazardous to your health. Each additional "hassler" in your network predicts 1.5% faster biological aging—and poorer physical and mental well-being over time. Non-spouse family hasslers are the most problematic. Some ties aren't worth the toll they take.

There’s a Name for the People Who Drain You

“Hasslers” make life more difficult—and we can’t escape them.

theatlantic.com

The internet doesn't bring out the worst in people. It makes the worst people more visible. Across all 30 countries studied, those who are nasty in online political discussions are nasty in real life, too. They seek status through hostility. Don't feed the hand that bites you.

The definition of a true fan: You’d rather see your team lose fairly than win unfairly.

What really drives leaders to resist remote work isn't productivity. It’s ego. Our new data: Ordering people in full-time is a power and status move. Bosses want to be worshiped at the office altar. Work policies shouldn’t be vanity projects. Hybrid is better for people and performance.

Opinion | The Secret Reason Bosses Want Everyone Back in the Office, Every Day of the Week

nytimes.com

Resting is not a waste of time. It's an investment in well-being. Relaxing is not a sign of laziness. It's a source of energy. Breaks are not a distraction. They're a chance to refocus attention. Play is not a frivolous activity. It's a path to connection and creativity.

Connection is not about how much time we spend together. It's about how much joy and meaning we create together. Overjoyed to announce my new book: adamgrant.net/book/vibe/

The cure for ignorance is not information. It's humility and curiosity. Facts can be easily dismissed. What motivates people to gain insight is recognizing gaps in their understanding and wanting to find out more. The root of lifelong learning is knowing how little we know.

Dear critics of Lindsey Vonn: Kindly shut up and go back to your couch. Grit isn't defined by the result—it’s revealed by the effort. Resilience isn't seen in a fall—it’s shown in the resolve to bounce back. Success is more than the finish. It's the distance traveled to the start.

Our highest loyalty doesn't belong to people or parties. It belongs to principles. If you wouldn't accept it from your opponents, you shouldn't accept it from your allies. Integrity is standing by your values even when your own group violates them.

Charisma is overvalued. Character is undervalued.

Don’t label a generation lazy because they’re not willing to make the same sacrifices you did. Refusing to jeopardize your well-being for your boss is not an act of disrespect. It’s an expression of self-respect.

People are more drawn to arrogant leaders in an uncertain world. They mistake swagger for strength & skill. Narcissists are unfit to lead. They see power as an opportunity to seize, not a responsibility to serve. Great leaders blend confidence with humility and put their missions above their egos.

Opinion | Why We Fall for Narcissistic Leaders, Starting in Grade School

nytimes.com

The 8-hour work day was not ordained from above for all time. It was dreamed up by humans. It doesn't make sense for every person, every job, or every organization. We can be as productive and creative in 6 focused hours as in 8 unfocused hours.

The true leader in a group is rarely the person who talks the most. It's usually the person who listens best. Listening is more than hearing what’s said. It’s noticing and surfacing what isn’t said. Inviting dissenting views and amplifying quiet voices are acts of leadership.

Too many mediocre men talk over capable women. Study of problem-solving teams: Men dominate the conversation, taking 50% more turns and saying 69% more than women. Men with low skill speak more than women with high skill. It's long past time to value competence over confidence.

It's time to remove laptops from classrooms. 24 experiments: Students learn more and get better grades after taking notes by hand than typing. It's not just because they're less distracted—writing enables deeper processing and more images. The pen is mightier than the keyboard.

Bingeing TikTok reels may be hazardous to your well-being. 71 studies, >98k people: The more short-form videos teens and adults watched, the more they struggled with attention, self-control, and stress and anxiety. Read a book. Watch a movie. Long live longform.

Weak leaders insist that they're the best. They seek attention to feed their egos, and measure success by how many followers they attract. Strong leaders ask how they can get better. They seek feedback to fuel their growth, and gauge success by how many lives they improve.

The more girls in a class, the merrier. Data on 87k students: In cohorts with more girls, boys and girls have better mental health. More female peers predicts closer friendships for boys—and better body image & STEM grades for girls. Girls build cultures of competence and care.

Cursing is rarely a symbol of low class. It's often a mark of high authenticity. Evidence: Swearing predicts higher rates of honesty and integrity. It signals a willingness to prize candor over courtesy. A little profanity can show that you're being real and you do give a damn.

If you reach a goal by compromising your values, you haven’t succeeded. If you fall short of a goal by upholding your values, you haven’t failed. The highest form of accomplishment is standing by your principles when they’re tested.

When you follow a leader, consider what would lead you to withdraw your support. If the answer is nothing, your integrity is in jeopardy. Our highest loyalty belongs to principles, not people. No leader deserves unconditional love. Commitment is earned through character.

When you get defensive about feedback, you fail twice. You fail to learn today, and you fail to encourage people to keep teaching you tomorrow. If you can't handle the truth, people stop telling you the truth. A key to growth is showing that you're coachable.

We spend too much time arguing like we're right—and too little time listening like we're wrong. Diatribes don't change minds. Productive disagreement depends on showing respect, curiosity, and humility. The most compelling teachers are the ones who are most eager to learn.

A mark of emotional intelligence is prioritizing your values over your moods. Immature people are victims of their feelings. Their choices are governed by fleeting sensations. Mature people take responsibility for their reactions. Their choices are guided by lasting principles.

Being kind boosts mental health more than seeking joy. Evidence: Doing 3 random acts of kindness a week is enough to reduce depression, anxiety & loneliness. It's more beneficial than doing nice things for yourself. Self-care feels good, but generosity builds lasting bonds.

The most meaningful way to succeed is to help others succeed.

Intelligence depends on more than cognitive horsepower. It requires cognitive flexibility. The faster the world evolves, the greater the cost of rigidity. Stubbornness is a path to getting trapped in the past. The future belongs to those with the courage to change their minds.

The love of reading is an endangered species. Just 16% of Americans do regular leisure reading—down from 28% in 2003. Only 41% of UK parents read daily to their toddlers—down from 64% in 2012. Books aren't merely a source of flow. They're a gateway to empathy and lifelong learning.

In unhealthy relationships, people walk on eggshells to avoid conflict. They tell you what you want to hear. In healthy relationships, people have the courage to address conflict. They tell you what you need to hear. Silence protects fragile ties. Candor strengthens real bonds.