toddler: no! i don’t want to eat the banana! me: that’s ok, just leave it on the plate toddler: no! i don’t want to leave it on the plate! she wants to not have her banana and not eat it too
after all this matt asked hazel what her favorite ride was and she said “the bus” we could’ve saved so much money! open.substack.com/pub/amberrol...
Happiest Place on Earth
ME: I have two more images ordered.
open.substack.com
I don't recall any previous transformative technologies that had to be sold to the public so hard. No one in 1999 was going, "Guys. Cell phone? It's coming, whether we like it or not. I think it's important, FOR WOMEN ESPECIALLY, to learn about cell phone. So that we're not left behind!!"
my toddler left half a banana out for an hour and then didn’t want to eat it because it was “old.” i sliced off the brown end, then cut the rest into “banana coins” and she ate them all! that’s the type of shit i get excited about these days.
i forgot to put my most recent shit posts here. first one is for paying subscribers only. but i did post this @frigidairecare.bsky.social review on insta substack.com/@amberrollo/...
i am a mean witch daddy. would you like to hide? - our 2 yr old just now
going to a pool party today that says it’s 4pm till midnight. i’m up at 5:30am every morning, kill me now.
i do mean to be dramatic and it feels like a god is playing with me like a doll. like i am their sims character and they’re the type to put me in the pool with no ladder.
He makes a dracula face at me, the shadow of a soy face. open.substack.com/pub/amberrol...
Give a Care, Take a Care
I am driving Hazel to school and I remember that I wanted to talk to her about something.
open.substack.com
tonight our 2 yr old said “live with arms wide open and hug your seltzer” so true
last week we transitioned our toddler from her crib & into a toddler bed. first couple of days i ended up sleeping on the wood floor next to her. but i just heard a “clunk” & checked the camera. she clearly fell out of the bed & looked annoyed, but she just crawled back into bed & went to sleep.
matt got blood taken today. we see a lot of doctors and have gotten a lot of blood drawn, but i’ve never experienced this before. they put a vile of his blood into a box, gave it back to us, along with a fedex bag and told us to drop it off at fedex. it was bizarre.
staring at the blank post before you. i wrote about explaining “unwritten” by natasha bedingfield to my 2 year old. but it’s really about the power in facing discomfort head on. open.substack.com/pub/amberrol...
Arms Wide Open
HAZEL: What’s this song about?
open.substack.com
it’s national caregivers day. about 1 in 5 people provide unpaid care to a loved one. you probably know one. it’s hard to understand until you are doing it (and you likely will) but it is heart wrenching, backbreaking work. do something nice for a caregiver you know. no advice please.
i wrote about the way strangers approach matt and the way it makes me feel open.substack.com/pub/amberrol...
Nunya
STRANGER: Did you break your arm or your leg
open.substack.com
i am so tired of ai on google. not a promo but just switched to duckduckgo and it was super easy to turn off all the ai features in the settings. you can hide ai generated images too. still unfortunately plugged into google for email, but nice to have a simple way to search.
i don’t want to brag but our fridge has been broken since last friday and i still didn’t buy anything today 💁♀️
consider me on the picket line in LA jan 30th! ✊ and also here are some things i think we should consider moving forward ❤️
I just wrote to my sisters about a letter I’m writing to my daughter about stopping breastfeeding and I wonder if I would be this dramatic if my life wasn’t so dramatic. I bet I would. I’m grateful I’m not in another timeline making a romantic substack about my matcha latte routine.
Every one of these announcements reads to me as "we don't have enough people and supplies to occupy more than one city at a time"
Shannon Heffernan@shannonheffernan.bsky.social · 8mo agoAlso: " Border Patrol officials also plan to send all nonlethal weapons housed in Chicago to Minnesota, according to the documents."
was up all night because my husband is sick. i’m infuriated by ice murdering another person (important to remember Renee Good is by no means the first and won’t be the last). i’m exhausted. so, going to volunteer today w/ mutual aid.
sitting on the couch listening to my husband fight for his life to read our 2 year old cinderella while she talks over everything word and i can’t help but think it’s perfect karma for his work as a podcaster.
Happy New Year! May your connection to the greater mushroom feel strong! open.substack.com/pub/amberrol...
Parasocial Pt 4
It’s 10:30 pm on New Year’s eve and I’m writing this alone in my bed and feeling guilty about it.
open.substack.com
i love how regular grocery shopping is like buying food at a theme park level expensive now. capitalism works so good.
my daughter is trying to put her hair clips on her dad just now and she says, no joke “primping is so hard” i don’t know where she learned that word. but she’s not wrong, primping ain’t easy.
i was about to be stressed this morning and then i remembered it was because of, checks notes, “last minute poetry edits for a podcast” i couldn’t bring myself to take something so made up seriously
my daughter keeps embarrassing me by asking “who’s that? what’s their name?” so loudly the other person hears. how am i supposed to remember every single classmate’s parents’ name? or that one cousin i see every 7 years?
my daughter would like a villain origin story movie, à la wicked or the joker, but from swiper the fox’s perspective.
i keep forgetting what social medias exist, which is a good sign for my mental health. but it was my birthday and i wrote a new piece! this is my favorite line
