let me into any normal, everyday grown-up conversation, and I can ruin it in seconds with nervous tics, involuntary blurtings and overt panic at my own attempts to fit in
Anton Bitel
@antbit.projectedfigures.com
Feckless freelance film critic and neurotic apanthrope. The #Horror, the #Horror Programmer for the London Korean Film Festival. London Film Critics' Circle, Online Film Critics Society. ProjectedFigures.com
🚨 NOW AVAILABLE TO PRE-ORDER! 🚨 The Great Unwatched: 200 Must-See Movies You May Have Missed (paperback, out November 2) is a must-have collection of must-see movie recommendations, chosen by a diverse group of critics. Limited gold edition for pre-orders only! plumeriapics.co.uk/shop/ols/pro...
"a mannered Meiji-era melodrama of the haves and the have-nots, of nature and nurture": Shinya Tsukamoto's GEMINI (Soseiji, 1999) screens 6.30pm today at @thenickelcinema.bsky.social, London. projectedfigures.com/2021/12/18/g...
Gemini (aka Soseiji) (1999) - Projected Figures
Shinya Tsukamoto's GEMINI (SOSEIJI) is a mannered Meiji-era melodrama of the haves and the have-nots, of nature and nurture.
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When we all die, it’s going to be so funny. I mean, sure, panic and scream, but don’t forget to laugh…
August is for panicking. So are October and November. I won’t be taking questions.
"Criminal and infernal underworlds merge": Takashi Miike’s hilariously transgressive freakshow of love, death and rebirth GOZU (2004) screens 9.30pm tonight at @fantasiafestival.com projectedfigures.com/2013/06/12/g...
Gozu (2004) - Projected Figures
In Takashi Miike's Gozu, criminal and infernal underworlds merge in a hilariously transgressive freakshow of love, death and rebirth.
projectedfigures.com
"figures unwanted pregnancy as alien invasion": Sean Wallace and Jordan Mark Windsor (aka THUNDERLIPS)'s hilariously banalised NZ sci-fi comedy MUM, I'M ALIEN PREGNANT (2026) has its UK première 8.30pm tonight at the @princecharlescinema.com opening #DukeFest. projectedfigures.com/2026/01/24/m...
Mum, I'm Alien Pregnant (2026) - Projected Figures
THUNDERLIPS’ MUM, I'M ALIEN PREGNANT is a hilariously banalised New Zealand sci-fi comedy that figures unwanted pregnancy as alien invasion
projectedfigures.com
Most of the time I write 500-1000 words for a film review without struggling to find things to say, but have just hit 310 on a film and feel utterly done.
"sends an ambitious sound recordist into a crabby old sea yarn": Jake Kuhn & Noah Stratton-Twine’s hilariously camp throwback THE PERIL AT PINCER POINT screens 9.35pm today/11.15am tomorrow at @fantasiafestival.com. Imagine Guy Maddin helming PotC. Love this. projectedfigures.com/2026/03/14/t...
The Peril at Pincer Point (2026) - Projected Figures
Jake Kuhn & Noah Stratton-Twine’s hilariously camp moviemaking throwback THE PERIL AT PINCER POINT sends a sound recordist into an old sea yarn
projectedfigures.com
“I don’t give a fuck about your war, or your President”: John Carpenter's dystopian action SF blaxploitation oater ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK (1981) turns its back on America's corrupted, fascist future. Screens 4.15pm today at @thenickelcinema.bsky.social, London. projectedfigures.com/2019/04/14/e...
Escape From New York (1981) - Projected Figures
John Carpenter's post-Watergate, pre-9/11 ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK offers bleak futurism while looking ruefully back to values from an older American playlist
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Feminism in the undercarriage: Roseanne Liang's plucky airborne adventure cum wartime creature feature SHADOW IN THE CLOUD (2020) takes down patriarchy as it defies gravity. On Tubi UK from today. projectedfigures.com/2023/01/03/s...
Shadow in the Cloud (2020) - Projected Figures
Roseanne Liang's plucky airborne adventure cum wartime creature feature accommodates feminism in its undercarriage.
projectedfigures.com
“a couple’s marriage tested by two uninvited guests”: Duncan Birmingham’s subtle domestic thriller WHO INVITED THEM (2022) is now on Tubi UK. projectedfigures.com/2023/07/26/w...
Who Invited Them (2022) - Projected Figures
Duncan Birmingham’s debut domestic thriller WHO INVITED THEM sees a couple’s marriage tested by two uninvited guests
projectedfigures.com
"a black mother wondering if she can get out of her nation’s legacy of social division": Jenna Cato Bass’ South African domestic horror GOOD MADAM (Mlungu Wam, 2021) is now on Tubi UK. projectedfigures.com/2022/03/08/g...
Good Madam (Mlungu Wam) (2021) - Projected Figures
Jenna Cato Bass' South African domestic horror GOOD MADAM shows a black mother wondering if she can get out of her nation's social divides
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Missing persons: a haunting story of a family cursed, like every family, with its own inherent mortality, Natalie Erika James' RELIC (2020) will move you to tears as much as terror. Now on Tubi UK. Unforgettable (ironic, given its dementia theme). projectedfigures.com/2021/01/03/r...
Relic (2020) - Projected Figures
Natalie Erika James' feature debut RELIC depicts the ravages of ageing and dementia as both haunted house and disorienting labyrinth
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"This is a wildly othered odyssey through Cape Town, that may or may not involve an alien intervention": Ryan Kruger's FRIED BARRY (2020) is now on Tubi UK. projectedfigures.com/2020/08/14/f...
Fried Barry (2020) - Projected Figures
Ryan Kruger's smack-filtered FRIED BARRY is a wildly othered odyssey through Cape Town, that may or may not involve an alien intervention.
projectedfigures.com
"underwater adventure rarely lets its pretty cast stray far from surface level": old review of John Stockwell’s INTO THE BLUE (2005), on Tubi UK from today. projectedfigures.com/2024/05/25/i...
Into the Blue (2005) - Projected Figures
John Stockwell's underwater adventure INTO THE BLUE rarely lets its pretty cast stray far from surface level
projectedfigures.com
"aims both barrels at Big America gun violence and Little England insularism": Edgar Wright’s high-calibre buddy cop parody HOT FUZZ (2007) is on Tubi UK from today. projectedfigures.com/2025/02/15/h...
Hot Fuzz (2007) - Projected Figures
Edgar Wright's high-calibre buddy cop parody HOT FUZZ takes aim at both Big America gun violence and Little England insularism
projectedfigures.com
Welcome home: "a granddaughter investigates her own traumatic inheritance", in Danny Villanueva Jr.’s uncanny, ambiguous ‘found footage’ tragedy WHAT HAPPENED TO DOROTHY BELL? (2024). On @shudder.com UK from today. projectedfigures.com/2024/09/22/w...
What Happened To Dorothy Bell? (2024) - Projected Figures
In Danny Villanueva Jr.'s uncanny 'found footage' WHAT HAPPENED TO DOROTHY BELL?, a granddaughter investigates her own traumatic inheritance
projectedfigures.com
Deep red: "Carrie’s climactic empowerment is all at once the tragedy and triumph of a young woman trapped between Biblical regression and a secular coming-out." Brian de Palma's CARRIE (1976) is on MUBI UK & Ireland from today. projectedfigures.com/2018/04/12/c...
Carrie (1976) - Projected Figures
The very first adaptation of a Stephen King novel, Brian De Palma's CARRIE captures a repressed young woman's bloodily violent coming of age.
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Ideally, when you start writing a review, you have at least a bare notion of what you think and want to say. But sometimes...
"if these folk do not wise up, wake up and learn to live and love together, all that shit will get them in the end": Gurcius Gewdner and Gustavo Vinagre’s cursed toilet horror comedy BOWELS OF HELL (2026) has its N. American prem 9.30pm at @fantasiafestival.com projectedfigures.com/2026/02/04/b...
Bowels of Hell (Privadas de suas vidas) (2026) - Projected Figures
Gurcius Gewdner and Gustavo Vinagre's cursed toilet horror comedy BOWELS OF HELL shows a building-ful of Brazilians drowning in their own shit
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"breaks down an avian pandemic apocalypse to scenes from a rapidly haemorrhaging marriage of convenience": Canadian première of Justin Calandriello’s found-footage short BIRDCALL (2026) 9.30pm tonight at @fantasiafestival.com as part of Horreurs All-Dressed. projectedfigures.com/2026/07/05/b...
Birdcall (2026) at Fantasia 2026 - Projected Figures
Justin Calandriello’s found-footage short BIRDCALL breaks down an avian pandemic apocalypse to scenes from a rapidly haemorrhaging marriage
projectedfigures.com