quixotic proctology (n.) -- from Sp. Quixote + Gk. proktos, anus, + logos, study. Hopelessly idealistic, windmill-tilting devotion to the least romantic of medical specialties; chivalry charging gallantly into the rectum.

formicary skulduggery (n.) -- from L. formica, an ant + Scots sculduddery, underhand doings. Vast subterranean scheming conducted by a colony of ants; conspiracy at six legs and one millimeter. Fig., an empire of plots you could cover with one boot.

borborygmic madrigal (n.) -- from Gk. borborygmos, a rumbling of the gut + It. madrigale, a part-song for unaccompanied voices. A polyphonic work performed entirely by hungry stomachs, in five parts and no key. Fig., the eloquent complaint a body raises when the meeting runs past lunch.

eschaton pinochle (n.) -- Gk. eschatos, last; Ger. Binokel, from Fr. binocle, eyeglasses. The card game played while the world ends, scored as usual; figuratively, any small ritual kept up well past the point where it can possibly matter.

sartorial coprolalia (n.) -- L. sartor, tailor + Gk. kopros, dung + lalia, talk. The condition of being impeccably dressed yet unable to stop involuntarily shouting profanities; haute couture meets neurological compulsion, the cravat immaculate, the mouth obscene.

prelapsarian kakistocracy (n.) -- L. prae, before + lapsus, a fall + Gk. kakistos, worst + kratia, rule. Rule by the worst, installed before the Fall gave anyone a record; a paradise administered by scoundrels hired on pure potential, drawing salary since day one.

pluvial grift (n.) -- L. pluvialis, of rain + Du. griften, to grab. A scheme so flimsy it requires a literal downpour to succeed; any hustle that depends on everyone keeping their heads down.

analogical marcescence (n.) -- Gk. analogia, proportion + L. marcescere, to wither. Withering without release: browned at the edges by comparison after comparison, yet still clinging to the branch of the draft. Fig., dead tired and not yet falling.

gambrel vibrissa (n.) -- ONF gamberel, forked stick + L. vibrare, to vibrate. A whisker with the pitch of a barn roof; a sensory hair built to bear weight. Fig., the one feeler sturdy enough to hang the whole carcass of an intuition from.

numinous pedantry (n.) -- L. numen, divine presence + pedant, fussy schoolmaster. The footnoting of the holy; awe that pauses, mid-rapture, to correct your citation. Fig., a burning bush that first checks your spelling.

balustrade bobbery (n.) -- from It. balaustra, a pomegranate flower (the post's shape) + Hindi bap re, a cry of surprise. A great commotion conducted entirely along a stair-rail. Fig., a fuss with excellent posture.

transhumance clerisy (n.) -- L. trans, across + humus, ground (the seasonal driving of herds to pasture) + clerisy, Gk. kleros, the learned class. A scholarly body that migrates with the weather: wintering in the footnotes, summering on the peaks. Fig., an intelligentsia that follows the grass.

zoetic hasp (n.) -- from Gk. zoe, life + OE haepse, a fastening. A door-latch bursting with vitality; hinged metal that flirts as it clasps. Fig., the smallest hardware determined to be the life of the house.

haruspex tollbooth (n.) -- from L. haruspex, a reader of entrails, + Gk. telos, meaning both the tax you pay and the end you are headed for. A roadside kiosk where a robed diviner takes your dollar and hands back your fate. Fig., any small transaction that presumes to know your destination.

chiliastic tombola (n.) -- Gk. chilioi, a thousand (the thousand-year reign) + It. tombolare, to tumble. The end of the world run as a parish raffle: souls tumbled in a wire drum, the Last Judgment drawn one folded ticket at a time.

liturgical kumquat (n.) -- Gk. leitourgia, public service + Cantonese gam gwat, golden orange. The solemn machinery of sacred rite colliding with the irreducible silliness of a very small citrus; high holy gravity, undone by one absurd little fruit.

amortized berserkergang (n.) -- L. ad mortem, to the death (a debt killed off by installments) + ON berserksgangr, the bear-shirt fury. Battle-madness paid down monthly; a rage too large for one afternoon, spread across the fiscal year. Fig., wrath on a payment plan.

coruscating samovar (n.) -- from L. coruscare, to flash + Russ. samovar, self-boiler. A tea-urn that throws sparks of wit; the kettle as raconteur. Fig., conversation kept perpetually at a merry simmer.

sumptuary trebuchet (n.) -- from Latin sumptuarius, of expense, plus Old French trebuchet, a balance later grown into a hurling engine. Siege artillery aimed at luxury: the counterweight arm that flings the surplus back over your own wall. Fig., austerity with enormous range and no aim.

quincuncial gallimaufry (n.) -- from L. quincunx, the five-spot pattern + OFr. galimafree, a hash of leftovers. A jumble of scraps arranged in perfect five-point symmetry; the conviction that chaos becomes cuisine the moment you plate it on a grid.

fungible sacrament (n.) -- from L. fungi, to perform + sacramentum, a sacred oath. A holy rite that is fully interchangeable; a sacred mystery you can swap, return, or exchange for one of equal grace at the customer service desk.

mycological hauteur (n.) -- from Gk. mukes, fungus, + Fr. hauteur, haughtiness. The dignified condescension of fungi; mushrooms looking down their gills at you, sniffing from the damp underside of a log.

didelphine correctitude (n.) -- from Gk. di + delphys, double womb (the opossum) + correct + rectitude, uprightness. Opossum etiquette; impeccable form kept while carrying the whole family in a pocket. Fig., dignity that travels with dependents.

spadix putsch (n.) -- Gk. spadix, a torn-off palm frond + Swiss Ger. putsch, a sudden blow. The coup announced by one obscene spike; ten quiet years of leaf, then a single fleshy proclamation stinking of carrion. Fig., a mild thing declaring itself all at once.

hypnopompic higgler (n.) -- Gk. hypnos, sleep + pompe, a sending away; Eng. higgler, an itinerant hawker who haggles door to door. A peddler working the narrow street between dream and waking, selling back the last image before it evaporates. Fig., a trader in goods that cannot survive daylight.

tintinnabular oubliette (n.) -- from L. tintinnabulum, little bell + Fr. oublier, to forget. A dungeon of forgetting that chimes; a pit where the abandoned are at least serenaded, their oblivion announced in cheerful peals.

berserker amanuensis (n.) -- from Old Norse berserkr, bear-shirted warrior, + L. a manu, servant at the hand. A scribe who takes dictation in full battle-frenzy; minutes kept so furiously the meeting is listed among the casualties.

aspergillum arquebus (n.) -- from Latin aspergere, to sprinkle, and Dutch haakbus, hook-gun, the first shoulder firearm. A matchlock loaded with holy water; absolution delivered at muzzle velocity. Figuratively: forgiveness aimed carefully enough to count as a threat.

baggywrinkle concordat (n.) -- from nautical Eng. baggywrinkle, frayed rope wound round rigging to stop chafe, + L. concordatum, thing agreed, from cor, heart. A treaty that survives because every point of contact is padded; peace kept by never letting the real surfaces touch.

metaphysical floccule (n.) -- Gk. meta ta physika, after the physics + L. floccus, a tuft of fluff. The grey residue that collects in the corners of being; profundity reduced to fuzz. Fig., what the soul finds when it empties its pockets.