Yeah so basically “gray asexual” means you’ll spend four years blissfully single, goin for little walks, thinking sex sounds pretty icky, and then all of a sudden hot girl likes you back and you’re staying up late speedrunning shibari tutorials cause you’ve been outta the game too long
Pro tip, become their best, most valuable employee before you quit out of morality Your message will hit much harder when it actually hurts their business
A lot of women are in relationships with men they aren’t attracted to bc the expectation is that we’re turned on by being called pretty I’m supposed to be attracted to you calling me attractive - and you’re supposed to look like a thumb that shops at Kohl’s or else the bros call you gay I’ll pass
Friends the love of my life likes jersey sheets what am I supposed to do Do I try to change her or do I suffer
At least twelve men in the last couple months have introduced themselves to me and are visibly disappointed that I didn’t remember their stupid white guy name I’m sorry Paul/Joe/Chris/Mike/Dave, you have no discernible personality and you’re not giving me money, you have not reserved a brain cell
If your runway collection includes a “message” and a can of red spray paint please stop designing clothes and start reading your very first book
“But sometimes rich person give big money to good thing” Some fucking guy who’s grandpa owned a steel company should not get to single-handedly decide whether a hospital gets built, why are we this comfortable with aristocracy repeating itself
I have queered the algo so hard that I now get targeted ads for both menstrual cups and FFS
Sometimes I consider deleting this app and then I come on here and someone slanders the NYT so good I spit out my juice
Life is an RPG and every taco place that’s between a vape shop and a liquor store is a save point
Tipping guide: Leave an amount that you would be pleasantly surprised to receive. If you have no frame of reference, ask a friend who works a tipped job. If you have no poor friends, tip 100%.
We have been living in a post-trump America for nearly ten years. It will never be over. The damage from this administration will last as long as the nation does. That’s why it’s important that your identity, and your intergenerarional intentions, are not centered on the identity of a state.
I’m not saying break up with your girlfriend I’m just saying how good are the poems she’s written you lately
There will now be two bathroom designations, Gay and Other Get out of my gay bathroom and leave us alone Go and pee with the cis men you think are so normal and safe, Linda
Never question the commitment of a woman who voluntarily gets in a 20 min line to use the bathroom when she was assigned the express lane at birth
Maybe the reason you think trans people are taking over even though they make up 1% of the population is because trans people keep being badasses who are really good at shit Like trans people are 1% of the population but they’re 20% of the people you’ve heard of Get good
Demisexuality has fun little Easter eggs sometimes Like I just found out apparently people get very nervous about using the bathroom at a new partner’s house in case something embarrassing happens Adorable By the time I’m attracted to someone we have already shit in the woods together
I’ve spoken to two adults in their late 30s this week who honest to god believe in dragons Like “we came up with dinosaurs to explain what was actually dragons” and “there are still Komodo dragons so why wouldn’t there be other dragons” I did not headbutt either of them and I would like a biscuit
Today a man said to me “can I ask, are you tall?” Like in person I was sitting next to him I said “I don’t know sorry” Ask surrealist questions get surrealist answers 🤷🏻♀️
Cool I’m getting targeted ads for Datura derivatives Hey kids, please don’t eat plants just cause the Internet told you they’re magical Datura will make you be dead
I miss when journalism wasn’t designed to generate a comments section
Me in 2005: “wow 2nd wave feminism was so crazy for saying you can’t be straight and a feminist” Me in 2026, looking around at the straights: “…. They may have been onto something”
Feminism isn’t your man acknowledging that you’re smarter and wiser and more mature and more capable and carrying all the responsibility - feminism is respecting yourself enough to be with someone who’s on your fucking level.
The best place for a Nazi is in three different dumpsters
A good thing to remember at museums is that, when something is really a gift, you don’t insist on it being labeled as “gift from me” forever. Rich people don’t understand gifts.
Wow I’m really glad Suzanne Collins’ work had such a broad reaching impact and got so many children familiar with the basic mechanics of oppression & resistance However I would also like you, an adult, to please ffs stop saying “Omg it’s just like hunger games” and read a real history book
People keep being like “bc of autism I thought people were serious when they said ‘let’s get coffee’ but it turns out nobody means that” My guy we most definitely do mean it. Allistic people arent just handing out fake invitations as a matter of course. Those people are called ‘assholes.’
I hope we can all admit to ourselves that if all we’re doing is yapping about what should or shouldn’t happen, then what we’ve really decided to do is wait and see what happens.
When white people refer to colonial powers as “we,” as in “when we took over the continent,” it’s always worth asking: Who is “we?” Are they taking care of you? White people don’t know what community is because of we did, we would immediately stop thinking of whiteness as our community.
IMO calling in sick to work is part of interviewing your boss. Do it early. If they: - push you to come in anyway - imply you’re lying / need extra proof - point out what an inconvenience it is for them - try to use it to turn your coworkers against you … begin your exit.