I don't know if this is the sticker I'd choose for a work van that clearly identified my business. But why the fuck not, mate. 😁
Bespoke Swears
@bespokeswears.bsky.social
Grumpy old lesbian in small-town Aotearoa. Amateur bagel baker, gardener, bird nerd. Rants about NZ politics, feminism, human rights and evil supermarkets guaranteed. She/her.
Hang on, if businesses aren’t interested in what the government is doing, then why are big businesses giving you and Seymour so much fucking money, Christopher?! #nzpol
henry cooke@henrycooke.bsky.social · 5d agoThe full comments the PM made at the Rotorua event, which the PM's office say Labour are mischaracterising as a "patronising lecture". www.thepost.co.nz/politics/361...
Told one of our regular customers that we're saying goodbye to our old dog next week - and he thought he should tell me how *every dog he's ever had* has died. NO THANK YOU.
Woman Crying and Covering Her Face
Alt: Woman Crying and Covering Her Face
static.klipy.com
Love it when a customer and I are chatting about the state of *things*, and we have to gently dance around politics in case the other person is a Nat/ACT/NZFirst supporter. And then we both finally figure out the other person is normal and we can just slag off the current bunch.
My mum watched the Kylie doco and said "I didn't know she was a gay icon!", and that's why straight people shouldn't be allowed to vote on laws for gay people.
My fat face accidentally pushed a button on my cellphone screen while I was on a call, and my phone started recording the conversation! I didn't even know that button existed! Whoops.
The fucking audacity of our supermarkets. Why are Kiwis struggling to buy food, huh?
Took the dog to the beach and came across three dead birds. Reported to MPI. I hate this for us, Aotearoa!
Highly recommend The Golden Spurtle on Netflix. (It’s a documentary about the porridge-making championships in small-town Scotland. Obvs.)
Had a great bonding moment with an elderly customer today, both of us swearing a blue streak about this fucking government and how awful they are. The COC really are bringing everyday Kiwis together.
Sorry boss, I'm going to be late today. Wordle was some fucking bullshit.
Random middle-of-the-night thought... What do people outside of Aotearoa call 'tarakihi'? Oh. Nice.
Took a great selfie of my dog and me at the beach today. Mānawatia a Matariki!
We grew a cauliflower! I am stupidly proud of this. (Who knew that seedlings plus garden, plus mulch, plus water, plus weeding, plus fertilizer, plus slug hunting, plus sunshine, plus caterpillar hunting, would equal one edible cauliflower?!)
Today's forecast is a high of 16 degrees, with an overnight low of 16 degrees. Wtf.
Anyone else getting multiple emails from ManageMyHealth, saying you've got new lab results? I've had about 15 emails in the last 24 hours. Doesn't seem scammy, just glitchy as all hell.
Emailed my (uselss-sack-of-shit) MP Tim Costley and politely suggested they could support evidence-based policies, rather than backing Winston's fucking vibes. I know I'll get a rude and dismissive response, but it really is the least I can do. Our trans whānau deserve better. #nzpol
It’s not often I tell my partner that she needs to watch a video of a chap fingering a spongey hole, but today was the day… (and it's weirdly not NSFW.) youtube.com/shorts/H0Pip...
The SQUELCHING sound 🥴💅 I am equally appalled and impressed.
YouTube video by Mitchell Coombs
youtube.com
Just had x-rays on my hips and am still not sure how I feel about the technician telling me to “roll over into the porn star position”. She even congratulated me on knowing what she meant! 😳
Walking my dog and some kids (ages 6-8ish) just told me they liked my dog AND my haircut. I'll be riding this high for days lol.
Our freight driver was telling me about a chat he had with his manager, who had fucked something up. Driver told the manager he was "so useless, you could be the New Zealand Prime Minister" #nzpol
Neighbours are blasting Roxette's 1991 hit "Joyride". That's certainly a choice.
This week I learned about the existence of air spades, for tree root removal, and I really don't need one, but HOW MUCH FUN COULD WE HAVE?!! www.treestuff.com/air-spade-ex...
AirSpade Excavation Tool for Arborists
The AIR-SPADE is a rugged and durable handheld tool that produces a stream of supersonic air that lets you excavate with minimal root damage.
treestuff.com
So someone in this government DOES understand that sometimes situations are unpredictable and you do need to be overly cautious in order to save lives. Huh. What a novel fucking idea. #nzpol
I'm a bit slow of the mark, but I just realised that because many supermarkets sell fuel, the govt's $50 support is STILL GOING TO THE FUCKING SUPERMARKETS. The supermarkets that are responsible for much of the cost of living crisis, the closure of NZ food producers, and food poverty in Aotearoa 😡