Thanks to Sandcastle Doctrine, you can sand your ground.

Grandma’s bespoke recipe for disaster.

Life is a temporary condition designed to sell coffins and urns.

*upgrades my common cold into a rare cold*

The Boy Who Cried Wolf Blitzer.

I don’t understand why everyone hates my KY Jellyfish lube so much.

“I can fix him.” is only ever true when it’s the vet saying they can neuter your pet.

Instead of saying ignorance is bliss, use goofhoria.

Me: Long hair, don’t care. The police: Your child is dead. Me: Did I fucking stutter?

Wearing chain mail in battle sorta defeats the point, doesn’t it?

Tired: Finding your soul mate Wired: Finding your hole mate

Blood is thicker than water. Explaining why you’re so dumb.

You can tell a lot about someone by the way they respond when you push them into an active volcano.

Good grief? Bro, all of my grief is awful.

That cumshot on the ass was the icing on the cake.

This guy…not a great Uncle, I tell ya.

Spilleth thy bean, gossipmonger.

@tinyideastuff.bsky.social does it again. Honk shoo.

ann is asleep

YouTube video by tiny idea

youtube.com

When a rich person farts, that’s a noble gas.

Groundhog Day was the OG save scumming.

Bro, you said you're a people pleaser, but you're never at the orgy?

When you die without a will, that means you died with a won’t.

The world’s biggest lie:

What you heard: They performed surgery on a grape. What you didn’t: They later denied the health insurance claim of the grape and they’re now in massive medical debt.

Conservatives do have culture. It’s called haughtyculture.

My tombstone: He died doing what he loved...karaoke. *flashback to the karaoke incident where everyone is kicking my ass for singing Monk's theme tune repeatedly*

A porn parody: Columboner, the One-Eyed Monsieur.

*blacksmith creating the world’s first long bladed weapon* This is just like those fucking fish.

Triforce? Sounds like a cop motto.

Bluesky reveals top 38 ages: 1. 38 2. 38 3. 38 4. 38 5. 38 6. 38 7. 38 8. 38 9. 38 10. 38 11. 38 12. 38 13. 38 14. 38 15. 38 16. 38 17. 38 18. 38 19. 38 20. 38 21. 38 22. 38 23. 38 24. 38 25. 38 26. 38 27. 38 28. 38 29. 38 30. 38 31. 38 32. 38 33. 38 34. 38 35. 38 36. 38 37. 38 38. 69