Arguably the greatest strength of our United Kingdom is its simplicity. Swinney would destroy all of this, and for what?

If there's one thing Unionists are renowned for, it's our astute analysis. Trust the grown-ups in the room. Don't leave the UK: *lead* the UK!

Look: we have the utmost respect for David Tennant. But when they claimed that Scotland could govern itself like every other country on Earth, they went down in our estimations. Pool and share.

Nobody is fonder of Scotland than Andrew Bowie. So when they say that Scotland making its own laws would be an apocalyptic disaster, we should listen. We don't have a choice. Now is not the time.

All across Our Precious Union, we are beginning to see the benefits of Brexit. But the SNP want to disrupt this progress. It's contemptible. Busted flush.

As one proud United Kingdom, we have achieved great things together. Now Swinney wants to throw our centuries of shared history in the bin? Ludicrous. Strong and stable.

Swinney and the Greens want to nationalise cows. Vile. Only a vote for John Rentoul will stop this.

“Swinney does not speak for Scotland: I do!!!” Life-affirming stuff as Nadine Dorries shouts at Pete Wishart over the apocalyptic separatist plot to cancel Prince Andrew.

As proud Scots, we enjoy nothing more than settling down and enjoying some chocolate. But Swinney's separatism will endanger this. Anas Sarwar as First Minister could've stopped this.

Think Brexit is bad? Andrew Bowie has confirmed that #ScottishIndependence will lead to Scotland becoming a normal European country. Broad shoulders.

As one proud United Kingdom, we have achieved great things together. Now Swinney wants to throw our centuries of shared history in the bin? Ludicrous. Strong and stable.

As one proud United Kingdom, we have achieved great things together. Now Swinney wants to throw our centuries of shared history in the bin? Ludicrous. Now is not the time.

The world's most dangerous politician is one Jonathan Swinney. But don't just take our word for it: trust the sacred word of Lord Monckton. Get on with the day job.

Think Brexit is bad? The DUP has confirmed that #ScottishIndependence will lead to an increase in those dodgy paving stones where you trip up and look back as if to blame the pavement. Yet more proof that we're Better Together.

As proud Scots, we love to see England get gubbed in the rugby union. But as Unionists, we understand that Scotland running itself would be Armageddon. It's quite simple frankly.

“Yes ok, I like Scotland and the UK equally. Sorry, who am I speaking with? Are you a delivery person?” Good to see complete agreement between Mr. Beast and Scottish Labour that Scotland running itself would be impossible.

We can only imagine the disasters that will befall us if Swinney gets his way. But in the UK we have safety, security and a solid track record. Why risk it all? If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

We can only imagine the disasters that will befall us if Swinney gets his way. But in the UK we have safety, security and a solid track record. Why risk it all? Strong and stable.

When you think about titans of the political scene, you think about the likes of Nadhim Zahawi or Hartley-Brewer. So when they warn us about the dangers of separation, we must heed their advice. There is simply no alternative.

As proud Scots, we love to see England get gubbed in the tennis. But as Unionists, we understand that Scotland running itself would be Armageddon. It's quite simple frankly.

All across Our Precious Union, we are beginning to see the benefits of Brexit. But the SNP want to disrupt this progress. It's contemptible. Anas Sarwar as First Minister could've stopped this.

Swinney and the Greens want to nationalise Barrowman. Vile. Only a vote for Frank McAveety will stop this.

As one proud United Kingdom, we have achieved great things together. Now Swinney wants to throw our centuries of shared history in the bin? Ludicrous. Pool and share.

Look: we have the utmost respect for Frankie Boyle. But when they claimed that Scotland could govern itself like every other country on Earth, they went down in our estimations. UK OK.

Look: we have the utmost respect for Biffy Clyro. But when they claimed that Scotland could govern itself like every other country on Earth, they went down in our estimations. We simply can't risk this.

All across Our Precious Union, we are beginning to see the benefits of Brexit. But the SNP want to disrupt this progress. It's contemptible. We simply can't risk this.

Nobody has their finger on the pulse of Scottish public opinion like Lee Anderson. When they say Swinney is dangerous, we should sit up and take notice. Get Brexit Done.

If there's one thing Unionists are renowned for, it's our astute analysis. Trust the grown-ups in the room. Pool and share.

The SNP are obsessed with separation. Literally their only policy is ripping apart Our Precious Union. Yet more proof that we're Better Together.

Only the Labour Party can lead us through the #CostOfLivingCrisis. Under Swinney's ludicrous plans, we can't even guarantee we would be able to keep our beloved toothpaste. Red White & Blue Brexit.