You know that scene in Matilda where the boy eats an entire cake while everyone watches? That’s the theme for my next birthday party
@breathofthemild.bsky.social
If a friend invited me out to just randomly run some errands with them I think I’d lose my shit (positive)
Have I grown less pessimistic and more accepting of differing interpretations of the IP over the past couple of decades, or am I genuinely living in some sort of Spider-Man golden age (comics withstanding)? Because I swear everything Spider-Man (comics withstanding) I see is fucking S tier
“You guys couldn’t handle REAL Zelda. In Skyward Sword, you had to walk to designated warp points, not just fast travel when you wanted to!” This is what old head Fire Emblem fans sound like when they bitch about the time dilation mechanism
Nice argument. Only problem is that the voice memo you sent in lieu of a typed argument included a millennial pause, and I have pointed this out in the group chat, which makes your stance invalid
Mitch McConnell remembered he was just months away from GTA 6 and powered through
It’s 2013. Ubisoft has inexplicably delayed the release of the already finished Rayman Legends out of its original release window that had very little competition, and will instead release it in direct competition of a new Grand Theft Auto and a Legend of Zelda remake It’s 2026. Guess fucking what
Imagine if I called the police to report a robbery, and when the officers showed up, they just looked at the actively stealing thief and said “bro that’s illegal” ad nauseam and watched the thief continue and eventually leave This post is about the Democratic Party
Marvel movies have broken us as a movie watching society. I’m in a theater of people waiting through credits to see if there’s an after credits scene for Coyote Vs. Acme
Everything I don’t like is DEI from this point going forward. Parents that don’t read my emails? DEI Video game prices too high? DEI Ran out of edibles? DEI Hot friends that don’t send me more selfies? Guess fucking what
I’m almost positive there’s a way to monetize the skill of knowing all the Weird Al polka medleys by heart, I just haven’t figured it out yet
Putting off cleaning the kitchen by doomscrolling on the toilet
My official ranking of the live action Spider-Man movies. Please god someone give a shit
I’m in a seemingly never ending meeting and I have to take an absolutely massive, mondo sized dump
“Socialism is when *describes a situation unique to late stage capitalism*”
I just got off the phone with Mitch McConnell, he said he’s willing to try and make it work for the kids
Buzz Lightyear believing he’s really buzz lightyear and getting really into acting it out, except Andy got really into Warhammer instead
I spoke with Mitch McConnell on the phone for about 20 minutes this morning. He said I should totally spend all day playing different versions of Rayman 1
I’m confident that I build the ikea furniture better at midnight than if I did it at like 10am ngl
The hotel breakfast bar is playing the damn Super Mario 64 file select menu theme wtf is going on
Just let out the loudest fart imaginable while doing dumbbell side bends
Calories are fucking stupid. Wtf do you mean a banana is 200 calories?
Slammed on my brakes for what I thought was a police car. Turns out it was an exterminator dubbed Pest Police. I can tell who I’m not hiring in the future. Damn bed bug can have a gun to my head and I won’t be calling them
Happy Pride to my paycheck, which reaches my account twice a month
Just so you’re all aware; your anxiety it right, we can hear your chewing
