Bunnie Stevens

@bunniestevens.bsky.social

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My 5 year old just touched my leg and screamed ‘mummy why are you so spikey?’ So I said it’s because I’m a grown up. He told that his dad is a grown up & doesn’t have spikey legs. So I said ‘patriarchy, init’. He told me that he’s never going near me again 😬

It really isn’t hard not to be a f*cking creep. I personally have nothing against age-gap relationships - in fact I’m often in them, I sometimes play with younger people (late twenties/early thirties) and the oldest person I play with is in their 80’s….

I’m at the soft play with my son, except I can’t join in today cos I’ve only gone & fucked my neck up (slouching and doom-scrolling for too long). I know I’m supposed to be 40, but it sucks cos the kids are throwing the soft footballs down The Big Slide I want to join in…

Summer expections: wearing ridiculously cute little dresses and drinking fruity alcoholic beverages with your hot mates. Summer reality: waddling around your flat with no knickers on, trying (and failing) to air out a disturbingly sweaty vulva.

Portrait of me - a white woman with long, dyed red, hair - I’m looking over my shoulder and smiling.