The look my wife gives me when she sees how much I spent at the comic con

My first thought when I saw the trailer for OTHER MOMMY was, "Bryce Howard is in this?"

Rewatching X Files and I have to say, this would be over in season 1. "I WAS JUST PUT IN A COCOON BY FIREFLIES!! THIS JOB ISN'T WORTH 30k A YEAR! I QUIT!"

Find me a movie where David Rappaport is acting and doesn't wave his arms around like he's trying to get rid of cigarette smoke before his mom comes home

Kermit The Frog Muppet

ALT: Kermit The Frog Muppet

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Sorry, but if you made a movie in 2026 and there's no trailer, I'm assuming it's bad.

The FBI saying beastiality isn't an automatic dismissal now sure changes the vibe on SILENCE OF THE LAMBS.

Just a reminder. I write books. I've been told they're good. Burrmartin.com

Watching people cheer when they're offered $5k to vote for the same people who cut food services for children, is quite the sobering moment

I don't celebrate people's deaths. I celebrate the lives that stop being negatively affected by those people.

So, i wake in the morning, and i step outside, and I take a deep breath and scream "SU-Su-Sudio!"

If trump were alive 2000 years ago, he would've sold the nails to crucify Christ and then want them back when they were done.

He dyed his hair. He wears makeup. He wears high heels. He likes to post selfies in different outfits. He wants a ballroom.

Girl Maria Heated Rivalry Girl Seriously

ALT: Girl Maria Heated Rivalry Girl Seriously

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When your dog is wondering why you made it rain outside...

The new Progressive commercial where they introduce an influencer hits me so hard. "So, this is just you opening up a box?"

Someone please send Luigi a Punisher shirt for this timeline to start making sense

Congratulations to the HBO show LANTERNS. The nerds are so upset, you'd think the entire cast were female.

I love when dentists say, "Why haven't you been in more?" and then give you a 'road map' of how they can help for about $12,000.

The only reason Elon is hitting the moon with a rocket is to say "I did that", instead of feeding thousands of children and saying "I did that".

Florida just recorded its highest number of leprosy cases in modern history. RFK jr says we aren't going to push vaccinations because meat is better when it falls off the bone

You know when you have a friend you talk crap about sometimes and then some stranger who doesn't know him starts to talk a lot of crap about them and they didn't earn the right, so you tell them to shut up? My friend is Spokane.

jmo, (and I don't want to get into a religious debate. This isn't what this post is about) but commenting "prayers" feels like when someone responds to your text with "K".

So I guess now would be a good time for trump to drag his piss filled diapered ass up to that giant faucet and give it a turn to help us out with these fires, eh?

Right now in America, a safe BLT is... Tomatoes

I don't care what trump receives. Give him awards. Give him rings. Give him planes. He's got one fluid filled foot in the grave now. All those trinkets will be fought for by his gremlin kids and arse lickers. Hopefully most of it will still be on his body when they fight for them.

Spider-Man Brand New Day feels like two movies and both of them are for comic book readers. Last time I felt the many emotions was watching Thunderbolts. Top 5 Spider Man movie

A highlight reel of people punching me just because....

You know, truthfully, we've never seen Ebenezer Scrooge and Mitch McConnell in the same room at the same time

Conservative Lunch special: LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN-ING THE LIBS Taylor Farms salad with ivermectin dressing and unpasteurized milk on the side.

Walmarts New Brand "Trust Me, Bro Farms"

Hannah Waddingham should be the next 007 and I won't be taking any questions because I have spoken