Melania reheating Elizabeth Holmes stern black turtleneck nachos 💀
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I hate gay Halloween what do you mean you’re the drunk Indiana democrat slurring her way through an interview on live tv
News Eye@newseye.bsky.social · last mo.This can’t be real. Yet somehow is. Please stay till the end. The last line is…👌 Introducing Democrat Jaime West, running for election for Fayette County Council, District 4 in Indiana. (🎥 Viva Frei)
It sucks so bad that going to the gym actually does make me feel better
Funniest possible result of this ballroom situation is Democrats take office in 2028 and name it some shit like the “Barack Obama Ballroom” just to spite him
Oh shit she found out about the COVID conscious lesbian bar in western Massachusetts going mask optional on Saturday evenings
Is it unprofessional to bring an iced coffee to a job interview? What if I brought a Pop Tarts Frosted S’mores Buzz Ball. What then. Life is fleeting. I haven’t had a successful job interview in five years
Fun, affordable date idea: going to the grocery store and watching the live lobster tank but not buying anything
Do bored midwestern teens still drive around for fun or is that too expensive now
It cracks me up how people will steal even the lamest looking packages off the street, like okay bro I hope you enjoy my ten dollar banana hooks 😭
eating a banana is so embarrassing like okay im really giving monkey
Reminder that Dolly Parton never became a billionaire not because she couldn’t be, but because she never wanted to be 💖 rest in peace to a beautiful soul ✨
My new favorite genre of photo is Trump’s aide Natalie Harp ominously following him around wherever he goes like that girl from the movie Obsession
The obvious replacement to Karoline Leavitt and only person who could diva out on her level is Kristie Noem’s bimbofied husband giving press conferences wearing those huge fake tits
You can tell a lot about a gay guy based on what color of heart emoji he uses ❤️
Cats are awesome, like yeah let me bring this beast into my home who scratches me and all of my belongings 😊
When a woman has a custom license plate: gorgeous, beautiful, confident, sexy, c*nty, slay When a man had a custom license plate: perverted, disgusting, full of himself, call 911 immediately
Omg the plane landed EVERYONE STAND UP AND FORM A MOB IN THE WALKWAY!!
Can’t pay attention to this trump speech because I’m so distracted by the comically large shoulder pads on his suit
Oh girl I’m not worried about the explosive diarrhea lettuce parasite I’m on PrEP 💁🏼♂️
I heard that REAL PATRIOTS who LOVE and voted for our PRESIDENT are eating TONS AND TONS of lettuce RIGHT NOW! DONT let fake news media fool you, support our dear leader Donald Trump and EAT THE LETTUCE! 🥬 MAKE AMERICA GREEN AGAIN! Thank you for your attention to this matter.
Petition for every restaurant to give me wayyyy more bread than necessary for the provided dip so I can us the bread as a vehicle for dip and still have some bread left over to snack on
Why did we ever stop using the cowbell in music BRING BACK THE HORNY DISCO COWBELL
Tbh trump does rly act like he just fell out of a coconut tree
The flop that is the Great American State Fair starts to make sense when you remember that Trump is a NYC trust fund kid who’s never once spent time in a rural county let alone one that throws an actually great state fair