If I had a Time Machine I would transport my enemies to a TJ Maxx/HomeGoods store on Black Friday in 2010
localswampgay
@localswampgay.bsky.social
Here I am, once again bald advocate
happy national coming out day in 2013 my friend and I each came to each other through Snapchat and interstate every day not having the Snapchat
it’s when the Parker Twins were at the isolation cabin in the parent trap weather outside
if you want to see how cooked we are about AI - look at any of the comments under Jesha Stevens (“and it’s guy healthy”) videos “how does this berry stay perfectly placed on the bun, it’s AI” no it’s editing “Why does the light change” becuase it’s filmed over the course of a few days
I’ve had five different kinds of cake in the last 24 hours
it’s good video trends weren’t around in the 2010s otherwise we would have bears playing “Cups” from pitch perfect on their stomachs and who wants to see that??? 👀
Idea for a gay and their girl bestie: Mr. Tumnus and Lucy
I don’t like the jar trend why are we putting things in jars
my mom thinks baking a cake together is going to be cute but it’s more me saying “no, not like that” and her being “what do you mean”
hate when people are hotter and smarter than me like who do you think you are
it shouldn’t surprise me that things are going haywire because my dad is for all intents and purposes an idea man and has never planned anything in his life
localswampgay@localswampgay.bsky.social · 3w agoproving very difficult not to spill the beans about my moms surprise bday party because I keep wanting to make fun of my dad in the group chat he started and tell her about all the silly things he says
does no one in this family know how to regulate their emotions???
localswampgay@localswampgay.bsky.social · 5d agoI may be my parents youngest but I am also their eldest daughter
every day I think about my coworker who won the lottery and quit and my colleague who had enough, quit and now works in her fathers goat farm
if I ever got to a point professionally that someone has followed up more than four times over the course of a month without a response from me, I think I would die from embarrassment - some of my colleagues don’t seem to have that same feeling.
I think Mike Flanagan should adapt the Blue is For Nightmare young adult series
any flour based carbohydrate can become stuffing or pudding if you want
I need two other bald men to fulfill execute my exeggutor costume idea
my parents and I all having a birthday in the same week; parade of cakes
will one of you with the large muscle crack my back please
now what am I supposed to do after adults is done, be one???
kumori must think I shit myself every other day with the amount of emails they send me