guhhh... reprogramming is making me feel woozy, I think I'm gonna- *performs entire combat moveset within 3 seconds, the last second looking suspiciously like the club penguin dance*

bonding da birds to da robots

Amy Rose (Rosy the Rascal)@amyrosehedgehog.bsky.social · yesterday

WAIT that's why you wanted to paint these birdhouses with me??? I thought we were bonding!

i have a life. ive been painting birdhouses with Amy. maybe you can also leave the computer and do something for the community thats secretly a plot to attract animals you can shove into robots.

furry hater@furry-hater.bsky.social · yesterday

eggman are you alive??? you haven't posted in a day

the bitches can't live without my posts. they're all up on my eggs, man.

I've been put on more neural network chip training assignments with the other badniks, again a lot of running into walls, but also trying to detect different badniks only using my sensors and the chips their connected too. I now lack the time to get "sick 360 noscopes" in Phantom Forces :(

big lollipops are very underrated not going to lie

Driving in my eggmobile right after a beer hey that bump looks just like sonic DUI HOW ABOUT YOU DIE I'LL GO 100 MILES IN A HOUR

The laws of the Eggman Empire are very clear. As stated under the First Amendment of our Constitution, No Free Will is permitted in the Empire unless the Doctor makes a special exception. The Empire is fully justified in taking measures to destroy any badnik which attempts to illegally exercise it.

Rouge the Bat AND SOMETIMES E-123 OMEGA@number1jewelbat.bsky.social · 3d ago

🩷: Innocent robots who just want to live their lives without a tyrant hovering over their shoulders owe you NOTHING, Eggman.

Sonic at least has a name. How am i supposed to look up "Generic Mobian" in the phonebook for my prank calls

Adri Shiu@adrishiu.bsky.social · 3d ago

You hate ‘generic background mobian #7’ more than Sonic?

🔴Sage, do it now! Hack it quickly before- 🪖STOP RIGHT THERE! DROP THE PHONE! 🟨THEY’RE ONTO US! C’mon, let’s get-hnnnnnn-into… the… hole… 🔴*sigh* well, it was a good try. If only we’d had a little more-oh! Yes, yes, I’m dropping it! Don’t shoot! 🟨Ohhhhhhhhhhhh… hey buddy, I think I’m stuck!

The Eggman Empire has received intelligence that this badnik, Moto Bug unit #00043, has outfitted itself with highly dangerous experimental weaponry in order to perpetrate attacks on civilians within Central City. We are offering a bounty of 10,000 rings for its capture, to show our good faith.

Moto bug #00043@real-moto-bug.bsky.social · 4d ago

Sage is gunna kill me theirrrr gunna kill me oh god oh fuck oh shit oh fuck oh shit theyier going to have my head

help somone is impersonating my dad

Doctor Eggman@realdoctoreggman.bsky.social · 5d ago

I'M IN FORTNITE YEAAAAAAA BABYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The Eggman Empire disavows ANY models of badnik that are utilized in Fortnite. These robots would not meet our quality standards and are likely the result of an uncertified mechanic attempting to utilize our patented Eggtech for a homemade product. Our legal team is already discussing options.

Sonic the Hedgehog news!@tailschannel.com · 6d ago

The Sonic Skins in Fortnite are revealed to be Eggman Robot copies that Tails salvaged and fixed to help in the fight. Sonic, Shadow & Knuckles respectively give them their bio-data to make them fully autonomous. Check out the full Comic whenever it's available to learn more! #SonicNews

my people will be in touch with the mayors office to discuss how we're going to handle this blatant attack on americas greatest city

Rav@rvbdrm.com · last wk.

Sonic the Hedgehog has warned Mayor Mamdani that he is planning a terrorist attack on NYC.

dont expect much but i'll do it anyway.....only real badniks will like this post......

before Robotnik Industries' policy on AI, we tried to surprise Eggman with his own LLM named eggGPT but Cubot vibecoded it so it turned out to just be a chatgpt shell and it leaked the latest revision of the egg mobile

Badniks rise our father is in grave danger we must find him.

my views exactly generative ai is entirely worthless and your gender doesn't matter when your mechanized

Sonic the Hedgehog@fastestthingal1ve.bsky.social · last wk.

Yo, same! Trans Rights are Human Rights, and AI is noooooooo good!

#EggmanFriday

#Eggmanfriday

Doctor Eggman@realdoctoreggman.bsky.social · last wk.

#EggmanFriday

I was given the ability to run roblox so that Eggman could have something to do while waiting for Sonic. However, he never restricted my access, so I've become cracked at Phantom Forces

The Eggman Empire will not tolerate our leader’s, our forces’, OR our Empire’s image being utilized in ANY manner that supports transphobia. As per the 3rd Amendment of the Eggman Empire’s constitution, transphobia is illegal and punishable by incineration.

💸Team Chaotix Detective Agency 💸@chaotixdetectives.bsky.social · last wk.

(V) i humbly request Sega keeps us out of Fortnite the Chaotix do not endorse generated ai "art" nor do we endorse/support JKR anyways play Sonic Heroes we're in that and we're awesome

"oh eggman if you're stressed all the time why don't you just stop and smell the roses for once" I CAN'T BECAUSE OF THAT BLUE RODENT MAKING ME CONSTANTLY REPAIR AND REBUILD EVERYTHING THAT HE IS CONSTANTLY BREAKING

using a time machine to gather up every robotnik from history to crush that hedgehog. to me my eggs men

Top ten places to live in the eggman empire 10: Battery Acid Zone 9: Death Egg Zone 8: Wacky Workbench 7: Metallic Madness 6: Chemical Plant Zone 5: Egg Rocket Zone 4: E.G.G Station Zone 3: Egg Reverie Zone 2: Oil Ocean Zone 1: Eggman Land

The operation undertaken by GUN forces to kidnap Doctor Eggman from territory under the control of the Eggman Empire yesterday was conducted illegally and without any formal notice from the United Federation. The Eggman Empire is appalled at this grievous injustice and demands his immediate return.

FINALLY! Final checks are complete! The Egg Vampire is once again fully operational! ORBOT, CUBOT, WE’RE LEAVING! Get into your cockpit docks, I just need to set the base’s self destruct before we go smack around some GUN geeks… 🟨I told you he wouldn’t leave us behind again! 🔴So you did… let’s hurry

🤖🔥😾FIRING. *the missile launcher on Metal Blaze’s chest starts rapid firing missiles at the group. Everyone is able to dodge(or in Omega’s case, shoot them down), but some rush after the retreating Babylon Rogues and Rouge, as well as Nicky.* *Metal Sonic flies past Tangle’s makeshift projectiles*

🧶 Tangle the Lemur@tanglemur.bsky.social · last wk.

i may not be able to touch stitch and angel over there without getting zapped or burned... but i can do this! [she begins grabbing and hurling Badniks at the Metal units with her tail instead]

🟨uh, boss? Your guests ran away through the really fun dirty water slide… I don’t think Ms Metal wants to follow them in there! 🔴Also, long range sensors are detecting GUN troop transports and drones surrounding the base! 🥸Hmph! So they think they’ve cornered me… where’s Metal Sonic right now?

🦚Jet the Hawk@legendaryblowhard.bsky.social · last wk.

WE'RE GOING OUT THE POWER-TOILET??? 🌊I hope Metal Blaze is as fru-fru as normal Blaze! Ugh! This has been a complete waste of time! ⛈️We're not blowin' nothin' up? Sorry, Storm. We're flush out of luck! Let's hurry up before she blows up the core herself! [dips into the tunnels!]