I barely trust Jeff Bezos to get my Amazon package to me on the day it’s promised— I sure as fuck wouldn’t trust him with my political decisions. And Elon Musk can be trusted only to build cars that self-crash and rockets that explode— and to change election outcomes thru fraud.

Always remember that MAGA insisted on this for America.

Trump posted an AI photo of himself in a military uniform he never wore, decorated with medals he never earned.  Stolen valor is one of his favorites— Trump loves to take credit for things he’s never done. It’s the Republican way— they’re all lying bastards. apple.news/AuqhRFkJRTHK...

‘Stolen Valor’: Trump Ripped Over AI Pic Of Himself With Medals He Never Earned — HuffPost

Critics said the president’s latest AI fantasy crossed a line.

apple.news

I consistently remind people that giving all 3 branches of gov’t to Republicans was a far greater mistake than merely electing Trump. You fucked up, America. But— in 91 days, you can give the House and Senate to Democrats, and let us start repairing the damage. Vote like your life depends on it.

Trump brought Musk aboard to create DOGE because he couldn’t find anyone as corrupt and mendacious to embezzle funds from the U.S. Treasury, or anyone as comfortable dismantling longstanding and necessary federal agencies to cripple our government in running the country.

‘MAGA. We’re full of something alright.’

Iran continues to deny they’re holding ceasefire talks with the U.S.— but Trump insists that they are. ‘Credibility’ refers to the quality of being trustworthy. As the most prolific liar in world history, Trump has no cred at all. I believe the Iranians. apple.news/Aevt7eN_5SM-...

Trump administration claims Hormuz deal is close as Iran denies negotiations — The Washington Post

The status of the war remains in limbo, as Washington and Tehran offer differing versions of reality.

apple.news

Trump’s golf cheating is legendary. Caddies nicknamed him ‘Pele,’ because he kicks his ball into better spots before swinging. Now, it’s been revealed that he uses a faster golf cart so that he can reach OTHER players’ balls first, and move them unseen. apple.news/AOdZ5p0t5RN-...

‘We All Know He Cheats’: Trump’s Latest Golf Boast Backfires Spectacularly — HuffPost

The president declared himself the winner of another tournament, leading to renewed allegations of cheating.

apple.news

The Trump administration is entirely filled with people who wouldn’t be able to get hired to stock shelves at the Dollar Store. This isn’t a coincidence. If he hired people who were educated, skilled, and honest, they wouldn’t be willing to do the awful things he demands of them every day.

MAGA: We’re just the dregs of society. The angry, bitter, ignorant assholes who’ll spend our lives resenting the libs for being better than us in every possible way— and we’re willing to destroy America to punish them for it.

“How can any decent person possibly vote for Todd Blanche as AG?” Decent people won’t vote for him. Republicans will. There’s no such thing as a decent Republican. Todd Blanche is a corrupt, megalomaniacal bastard— and the people who’ll vote to approve him are just as awful.

Q: After dismissing the fake charges against a former Olympian— we know the Reflecting Pool issues were caused by incompetence— why does Trump continue to lie about vandals? Trump: Never give up on a lie. Nearly 40% of Americans still worry that immigrants are eating their dogs.

This is what happens when you give power to a political movement made up of 4th-grade dropouts who fly confederate flags and consider Duck Dynasty and Honey Boo Boo to be ‘fine family entertainment.’

America’s demented leader begins to understand that he cannot possibly win the pointless war he started with Iran, he’s looking to avoid appearing like the weak imbecile that he is. Once again, he’s claiming negotiations that Iran says are imaginary. apple.news/A3GGxoIVxQAS...

Trump calls Iranian leadership ‘extremely duplicitous’ after Tehran denies new talks will start Monday — NBC News

Iran said Monday it was not currently holding talks with the U.S. but was in discussions with Oman over a temporary safe route through the Strait of Hormuz.

apple.news

Before you feel good about 75% of Americans saying that Trump should be impeached, tried, and imprisoned— keep in mind that the majority of those same voters will re-elect corrupt Republicans to both Houses to ensure that Trump will never be punished.

I criticize Texans constantly because I’ve never seen a more self-destructive electorate in my life. Their elected officials are all monsters, and Texans just keep RE-electing them. In Texas, bank robbers hold a gun to their own heads, saying, ‘Gimme all the money or I get it.’

Cybersecurity experts reported that Iranian hackers had considered disrupting electrical service in Texas, but realized it’d just seem like any other day there.

C’mon, everyone knows this is bullshit. Trump isn’t negotiating to end the war. He’s manipulating the market so that he can add another $100M to his insider trading profits tomorrow morning. Even North Korea has less government corruption than the U.S.

MAGA: Presydent Trump done traveled back in time to film this here Pubic Service Announcement. Reality: He did what now? MAGA: He went back to WWII to film this here video. Reality: Wrong war. You’re off by about 170 years. MAGA: That can’t be right. See how young he looks?

Q: Predictions are that winning the Senate in Nov. will be remarkably tough for Democrats. Given the horror-show that America’s become, how could voters possibly re-elect GOP senators?! A: Corruption and racism are remarkably appealing traits for imbecilic voters, who’ll still protect Trump.

The Republican National Committee holds delightful welcoming ceremonies for new voters.

Every time I listen to Trump speak, I can almost feel my IQ dropping. I’m afraid that if I shook hands with him, I’d be able to feel my hand shrinking.

Q: Any tips for handling a MAGAt? A: They’re a lot like mushrooms— they like dark, damp spaces where they won’t encounter the truth. Q: Are they dangerous? A: Like cobras, they spit lies like venom, and avoid science, facts, and reality— and yes, they’re quite dangerous in large numbers.

As I point out constantly, the only people on earth who are as stupid as Donald Trump are the voters who support him. MAGA is a political movement for people who envy the cognitive ability of potted plants.

Allow me to explain. The source of your skepticism is quite understandable because you’ve confused American voters with people from any other nation on earth. But— these are cavemen. Cretinous troglodytes. Quite literally, the dumbest people in world history. Fungi are smarter.

Don’t be fooled by headlines like this one. In 94 days, Americans can limit Trump’s opportunity to damage the nation further— but if you believe the GOP will get only 20% of the vote, you’re dumb enough to be a Republican.

Put simply, Republicans are proving to the rest of the world that all of the awful things they believed about Americans were actually true all along.

LIke everything else he ever touches (Strait of Hormuz, anyone?), Donald Trump totally botched the renovation of the Reflecting Pool. Rather than tell the truth, he had a former Olympian arrested unjustly, and claimed vandals had cut a 350’ gash in the pool. All he does is lie.

MAGA: We don’t need no vaccines. Reality: The reason you grew up healthy is because you were vaccinated as a child. MAGA: But now that those diseases are gone, we don’t need the vaccines. Reality: But it doesn’t work that— MAGA: We know more about science than any doctor.

Yes, and there’s no punishment for the voters who elected him that could ever be sufficient. I certainly hope that hell is real because it needs to be filled with Republicans.