So, #WagonWednesday, hmm? Fine. Swear loyalty to the Empire, and reap the benefits…

//LRT check my other account gang

𝙂𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙜𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙜𝙤𝙤𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜!!! ＴＨＥ ＲＡＤＩＯ #TheBraveLittleToasterRP | #MVRP

Good afternoon, and glory to the Empire.

Good morning, and Glory to the Empire.

𝙈𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙜𝙖𝙡𝙖𝙭𝙮 𝙛𝙧𝙚𝙚. ＡＬＬＩＡＮＣＥ ＰＲＯＪＥＣＴ “ＲＯＳＥ” #SWRP | #STARWARSRP | #MVRP

//Hear me out gang— Project “Rose” is Project “Alma”’s Rebel counterpart, produced when a schematic for an early Alma prototype was stolen. The prototype failed because it was “too compassionate” or something I don’t have that part nailed down yet

𝙋𝙍𝙊𝙅𝙀𝘾𝙏 “𝘼𝙇𝙈𝘼”@empire-strikes.bsky.social · 3mo ago

//Y’KNOW WHAT HOLD ON I’VE GOT AN IDEA

//Y’KNOW WHAT HOLD ON I’VE GOT AN IDEA

//As much as I love having Alma be unwitting and giving her the constant “FELL FOR IT AGAIN AWARD,” I also love having her be an evil sadistic asshole sometimes

[Okay, now that she’s tortured its location out of that Rebel soldier, she’s burning a Rebel weapons cache to the ground! Alma, you naughty droid, you!]

I knew it!!! You monster!!!

Björn the Vampire Mouse@bjornthemouse.bsky.social · 3mo ago

“Alright…and after that I’ll go speak at a school and convince the student body to burn an effigy of Tarkin.”

[Beating a Rebel soldier senseless with her baton almost immediately after saying that shit about “the wrong side of history.” Fascinating.]

Fine then! Prove my point even further! Show to the galaxy just WHO is on the wrong side of history! Here’s a hint— it isn’t His Majesty!

Björn the Vampire Mouse@bjornthemouse.bsky.social · 3mo ago

“I would really love to stay, but I have to… go lie to my cadets about how many vacation homes the Emperor has to cover up all of his philanthropic efforts toward…something”

Do not be leaving so soon! I haven’t even gotten to the part where I dismantle your Alliance’s pitiful argument for abstract concepts like “self-determination” yet!!!

Björn the Vampire Mouse@bjornthemouse.bsky.social · 3mo ago

“Welp…this has all been…enlightening.” Takes a few steps back. “I need to go…be literally anywhere else right now.”

//Alma is THE ✨Imperial Propaganda Reader✨

That one is obvious. You see, [The droid proceeds to launch into the most whacked-out and obvious Imperial propaganda theory that Leia could have imagined. It lasts… several minutes.]

Björn the Vampire Mouse@bjornthemouse.bsky.social · 3mo ago

A pause. “Yes. Yes it was. You caught us. The Hutts designed the whole scheme using Jabba as the fall guy. Now begs the question what the hell does that have to do with Alderaanian civilians?”

[An eye roll of her own.] Clearly an inside job. You aren’t going to fool me with that one.

Björn the Vampire Mouse@bjornthemouse.bsky.social · 3mo ago

“Run by the—“ … “I killed Jabba the Hutt, you know that, right?”

Imperial Project “Alma” would be the accurate description. “Alma,” meaning “soul” in some languages. “Soul,” something you are quite clearly lacking.

𝑨𝒉𝒔𝒐𝒌𝒂 𝑻𝒂𝒏𝒐.@nojediladytano.bsky.social · 3mo ago

Fine. Imperial Clanker genocidal robot. Better and more accurate?

I can think for myself just fine, thank you. I just choose not to take propaganda from an “Alliance” CLEARLY run by the Hutt Clan.

Björn the Vampire Mouse@bjornthemouse.bsky.social · 3mo ago

An eye roll. “You know nothing but what you’re programmed to believe. But if the *Empire* were so opposed to exploitation, they would not have killed billions on account of the actions of a few.”

Oh, VERY original. What backwater did you crawl out of where that one was still popular?

ℂ𝕪𝕟𝕥𝕣𝕦 𝕍𝕚𝕕𝕒𝕤@cyntruvidas.bsky.social · 3mo ago

"GLORIFIED. COFFEE MAKER."

Against slavery, but still MORE than willing to say “you-know-what,” hmm?

𝑨𝒉𝒔𝒐𝒌𝒂 𝑻𝒂𝒏𝒐.@nojediladytano.bsky.social · 3mo ago

I'm against slavery. You still work for the Empire. Bad droid.

You could not comprehend a single string of calculations run by my elite processor. And the correct terminology would be “IMPERIAL scrap-heap.”

ℂ𝕪𝕟𝕥𝕣𝕦 𝕍𝕚𝕕𝕒𝕤@cyntruvidas.bsky.social · 3mo ago

"Empire scrap-heap..."

They were being exploited by the aforementioned Royal Guard and leadership. Aren’t you all supposed to be “against the exploitation of planets”?

Björn the Vampire Mouse@bjornthemouse.bsky.social · 3mo ago

There were billions of civilians who had nothing to do with the Alliance.

So say the supposed “abolitionists of slavery.”

𝑨𝒉𝒔𝒐𝒌𝒂 𝑻𝒂𝒏𝒐.@nojediladytano.bsky.social · 3mo ago

You work with the Empire. Deserved.

[Squinting her eye as she continues to hear the “C-word.”] You Rebel scum truly are a lost cause.

Alderaan was a major source of support for the Rebel Alliance, with the Royal Guard and leadership deeply involved in treasonous operations. That’s all there is to it.

Rebels REALLY want to portray themselves as purveyors of equality, with language like THAT? Tch. Pathetic.

[Turning her head 180° in an INSTANT.] Excuse you?

𝑨𝒉𝒔𝒐𝒌𝒂 𝑻𝒂𝒏𝒐.@nojediladytano.bsky.social · 3mo ago

Clanker.

What joke…?

𝑁𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑎 𝐴𝑟𝑘𝑖𝑛@satinandcredits.bsky.social · 3mo ago

“ the joke you told. or … was that not you? ”

Excuse me? [She looks confused.] What is funny?

𝑁𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑎 𝐴𝑟𝑘𝑖𝑛@satinandcredits.bsky.social · 3mo ago

@empire-strikes.bsky.social “ that’s actually quite funny. ”