Errai
@errai.bsky.social
from me the dragon / bf @sumiaou.bsky.social / errai.tf
The brainrot stuff is all a bit. Kids actually seek knowledge in their spare time. The other day a six-year-old at Walmart asked me if my deepest regrets made life any less worth living
(Getting to the first sex scene of a porno) Okay this is completely unnecessary
(after telling my date I dabble in fortune telling) (showing me an insta pic of her hugging a guy who’s very likely her ex) oh yes.… he carries a great karmic weight Date: wtf 😭 my dad was the sweetest person ever Me: (doubling down) this man was a demon
(Toddler posting on his private vent account) The world would be a happier, kinder place if people were allowed to have ice cream before finishing their veggies
(Watching a squirrel bury an acorn) We could learn so much from the amazing world of nature (realizing we already have and it’s called having savings) , actually, fuck these guys and their idiot nuts
(customer service voice) May I place you on a brief hold inside my crystal
New remote junior dev coworker briefly turned his webcam on by accident during standup and he had servants on both sides fanning him with large palm leaves and massive gilded tiger cages in the background
Me: really sorry to bail on you again, something serious came up My friend: lollll no problem at all my man, take care My friend: (logging on his swole robot roleplay account) (changing pfp to a wistful cyborg) Even the strongest machines break sometimes.… 🦾🩶
My preferred way to handle conflict is waiting for the other person to die of old age
It’s important to keep a small silo next to your bed in case you wake up thirsty for 300,000 gallons of water
(Real estate agent touring an apartment he knows nothing about) Great natural light (realizing there are no shadows) beautiful finishes (realizing that the unit has no defining traits, as if it actively resisted being perceived) Hey let’s go outside lol. Let’s go outside forever
I want to address the video. When my eyes popped out of my skull in the shape of hearts and my tongue unfurled onto the floor like a red carpet, it did not reflect who I am today. I am taking time away to grow from my actions, and I deeply apologize to those I offended.
Coworker: ohhh you’re taking a trip to Japan?! Jealous! Me: (trying to make him feel included) I’m jealous of your whole life too
(Last sheet of a toilet paper roll) Maybe I can make it if I divide it into four little squares (First sheet of a new toilet paper roll) Im da King of da Toulet
