@fiveankles.bsky.social
Everything you can expect from the World Cup Opening Ceremony. Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): uppbeat.io/t/benjamin-b... License code: JVYDUZB9GVWKNVC5
More nations than ever are taking part in this world cup, and it's going to be hot as balls.
Trying to impress Denise, though not sure I've quite chosen the right song. . . .
Taken from "The Ian Fiveankles Show". . .
The Exploding Heads@explodingheads.bsky.social · 4mo agoFootball pundits on the re-emergence of the long throw. . .
The latter stages of the Champions' League, so naturally everyone is talking about Manchester United. Taken from "The Ian Fiveankles Show"
"If Somalia bought Fulham, I'd forgive them all the piracy, I really would."
Very pleased to be back in the Stak studios for the coming soon "Ian Fiveankles Show". . .
The Exploding Heads@explodingheads.bsky.social · 4mo agoFootball pundits when there's a tight offside call...
Insights from Steve "Bouldy" Bould as to why Arsenal are so hated right now. With unbiased interview from yours truly.
"The War in Iran was started by WOKES!" Colin from Portsmouth says that the war is a ruse by carbon neutral lobbyists to put up the price of oil so we all start investing in green energy.
Good to see the President consulting Luis Suárez on the Middle East. He'll get his teeth into this, for sure.
"I'm shocked, Anthony! Peter Mandelson and Prince Andrew seemed like such stand up, decent blokes!" Colin from Portsmouth can't believe the Epstein findings.
POV Abraham Lincoln invites you to the theatre.
Heavy sighs, repressed emotions, and, erm, penalty decisions. . .
The Exploding Heads@explodingheads.bsky.social · 7mo agoStockley Park - the VAR period drama coming to ITV 1
If the history of life on earth is condensed into a single day, then humans did not appear until 11:59pm and 59 seconds, so one second before midnight. And if you look closely you can see James Milner coming on for his first Premier League appearance.
a man with a beard is wearing a blue shirt that says brighton united
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media.tenor.com
When I went back to Derby County, I booed myself in my own face.
The Exploding Heads@explodingheads.bsky.social · 9mo agoShould players be booed at their former clubs?
In advance of a live appearance this evening in Bethnal Green (tickets here: backyardcomedyclub.co.uk/event/link/?...) I am reminded of another speaking engagement a few years ago:
I have sympathy for Ekitike. Here are three of my sendings off when I should have known better: 🧵 1. Scoring a tap-in for Stockport County and then attempting to celebrate by re-enacting the entire opening credits of Baywatch across the length of the pitch.
a silhouette of a man standing on a beach with the word bay in the foreground
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media.tenor.com
I once got sent off for time-wasting while taking a throw-in. The ball boy hadn't given me the ball back yet. First, and I think ONLY, red card for waiting politely.
Nuno gave hope and the whiff of success to Nottingham Forest and no true fan wants that. What they crave is finishing 17th whilst having a 'bloody good bloke' in charge and that's exactly what Ange will deliver. Best of luck to them. Great club management.
England beating Andorra 2-0 is like turning up late to a five-a-side and still managing to nutmeg your own cousin. Job done, but nobody’s clapping. Not sure where Serbia is, it's somewhere down the back of Europe's sofa- but be warned, they do have actual footballers.
Transfer Deadline Day’s gone mad — Nadine Dorries completes shock move to Reform on a free. Meanwhile, Angela Rayner thought she'd scored a housing winner only to have it chalked off for offside in the Stamp Duty box. And then something about Nigel Farage and football.
Bloody Colin. He wouldn't last three minutes in the ring with my mate Steve Bould.
The Exploding Heads@explodingheads.bsky.social · 11mo ago"I painted a St George's Cross on a roundabout. What have YOU done for this country?"
Wrexham are actually owned by a couple of Hollywood actors. They should flag that up more. . .
The Exploding Heads@explodingheads.bsky.social · 12mo agoThe media every time Wrexham play
The Premier League is back! Liverpool will concede. Bournemouth are the wasps in the picnic basket of football. Plus, why I hate Rod f@$%ing Wallace. . .
My pick for this coming season's Dark Horses: Manchester United.
The Exploding Heads@explodingheads.bsky.social · 12mo agoMan United are dark horses this year. All they need to do is fix the defence, sort out the midfield, learn how to score goals again, adopt a coherent tactical system and completely overhaul the dressing room mentality, according to Ian @fiveankles.bsky.social