Sylux: YOU TOOK EVERYTHING FROM ME, I HATE YOU WITH ALL OF MY BEING Me: Frozone? No wait.. dulux... vectrex... wait i got this... Sylux: This time I... Me: Anyway Sux, what did you do again, something with metroids? did you try to use metroids for evil? Look i've been on a lot of adventures...

ive never met a wealthy man who claimed he was "rich enough" and ive never met a tomato sauce that claimed it wasn't

no, you can't "that's showbiz" me, i am the biz that shows

everyone online is like "this cat chose me" "cat distribution system" etc nah man, i saw a free orphan creature and i GRABBED HER. you live in my house now IDIOT

girlywhirly is a gender neutral term

Men these days don't rake and sweep anymore, all they do is blow leaf around, power wash, mow lawn and grill

me: oh i know some obscure indian dishes, how about chicken 65? tobi: chicken 65? you're allowed to put numbers in recipe names now? I should invent a recipe with a meme number. Think of the potential... me: (incomprehensible jibbering) tobi: say that again? me, through tears: quiche 64

the face of a hoe who challenged my to bowling and then bowls a perfect game on my ass, like can't we just have sex instead or something? can't you just take me to pound town the easy way for a change? geez

Good companion to gammon steak, no doubt.

actually had a cold this week that went away after a few days and didnt turn into like 5 days of flu, sinusitis and a 2 month cough. They still make those?

My body is a machine that puts post-op kitten back into her recovery suit after she wriggles out of it

Greta Gerwigs talents are wasted on the Narnia series, she should be making a Homestuck movie.

I'm not the biggest fan of "The Dig" out there, its pretty cool, peak env art, but man, that bit where brink gets his hand stuck in a rock had me laughing till my ribs hurt. I don't even know if it was meant to be funny but that absolutely slayed me.

Happy to share my latest personal project. An underwater lab/living space inspired by Overwatch. More screenshots on my ArtStation: www.artstation.com/artwork/1NABVq Currently looking for UK environment art roles (remote or Manchester area), give me a shout on: www.linkedin.com/in/chikeenhui/

Today is spayday for my lil babbygurl 😭 shes an unhappy lil maggot whos already houdini'd out of her cone and suit twice and quite fighty but im just so relieved it all went ok

No way his parents named him that

"theyfab"? "twinkhon"? sweetie, none of those words are in the DnD 5th edition players handbook.

"maybe" 🙄

trying not to crack up when i say "here you go, your favourite" as i hand my cat another moist chunk of lettuce that she is going to play with for the next 4 hours

7 prescription toothpastes in my cupboard, is this my dragon hoard? I don't want to be the toothpaste dragon. Although, my dragon's breath... it would be so fresh.

ug heres 9 animes that really influenced me, theres so many more though but yea, go ahead and tell me what else i need to watch based on my tastes :)

Deranged nicknames that my cat has accumulated so far: Ween, Gwen-weenie, Gwennus Pennus, Ser Gaveen, Crabbo-Grabbo, Grabiolus, Biggoween & Sluggo

started metroid prime 4. Hot take but if you don't like myles mackenzie you couldnt handle being a bad bitch with a nerdy boyfriend who kinda backseat games with you a lot, you would be crying and wheezing

fighting the second boss in a game be like "i think i know what to do here" *presses the wrong button* *presses the wrong button* *presses the wrong button* *presses the wrong button* *presses the wrong button*

Whys she out here looking like part of a nutritious breakfast

wwwwwwww eat dirt shimano, you can't spell funeral without REAL UNF

unstoppable pervert force meets immovable prude object

Underrated trope in videogames is when the boss has some sort of horrifying summon or final form that nobody talks about. A guy just bit me with a unicorn head made out of squirming skulls and we're just never going to speak of that again.

i feel like if people are skeptical about metroid ravenous then idk they're just skeptical about anything new at this point. what mercurysteam is doing with metroid is cool as hell, dread was sick. samus returns was sick. this sorta 90s toxic lizard mutant vibe its cooking is sick. blep