Read an article about Ariana Grande's health and never "noped" away from a comment section so hard in my life.

Uh sounds like it's more than dislocated then, buddy.

A new gender emerges, the XXXY.

W.E.D.em Boyz@leftistwonk.bsky.social · 3d ago

Jesus Christ. Sophie Cunningham fully embracing the right wing grift.

I like my women like I like my coffee: From Kwik Trip

richie@theregoesrichie.bsky.social · 4d ago

post your worst draft

Buddy I let my living grandma's repeated calls go to voicemail every time.

Gotta say, the Blair Witch documentary would have been boring as shit if all that terrifying stuff hadn't happened to them.

Bush about to come out with a shitload of "newly declassified" images of WMDs in Iraq.

Joseph Cox@josephcox.bsky.social · 5d ago

New from 404 Media: Google Earth has introduced an AI feature that lets anyone fabricate completely bullshit satellite images. In our own tests, we added a “bomb blast and crater” to an area of Los Angeles. This is a misinformation time bomb, will 100% be abused www.404media.co/google-earth...

I don't like the term "AI slop" because it implies that the problem is that the content sucks. It often does, but even if it kicked ass, there would be a hundred other problems with it.

We need to get rid of the stigma around self-pollination. It can be a healthy part of any fruit's sex life!

Kat Kerlin@katkerlin.bsky.social · last wk.

Some avocados are female in the morning and male in the afternoon, while others are on the opposite schedule. This helps them avoid self-pollination. How do they do it? A @ucdavis.bsky.social study explains. www.ucdavis.edu/food/news/st...

Even the planes are getting diarrhea, this outbreak is worse than I thought.

NPR@npr.org · 5d ago

Firefighters in the Gironde region of France said the situation had "stabilized", after a week of wildfires caused by a major heatwave across Europe. n.pr/4vVz3j7

Someone poured a bucket of diarrhea on Clemens before they got to him with the Gatorade™.

MLB@mlbbot.bsky.social · 6d ago

KODY CLEMENS ULTIMATE GRAND SLAM!

St. Paul mayor-ass name.

Actual names@actualnames.bsky.social · 6d ago

Weiner Wunder United States, Census, 1940

Hey, I diced all the veggies from the CSA and made a hash out of them and it tasted like shit. Thank you for your attention to this matter!

Saw the latest Jared Leto movie out of Morbin' curiosity.

CSA box finally getting good. The kohlrabi onslaught is at an end.

Seeing Anne Hathaway have a great year in 2026 kicks ass, btw.

Hell is dropping something while in an automatic revolving door.

I was told 30 years ago that only I could prevent forest fires and, honestly, I haven't done shit since then. I apologize, this is all my fault.

Who called it explosive diarrhea and not trauma dumping?

How fucking old am I going to get? This is ridiculous.

This Christmas, give her Anal Sex™.

Today is my 40th birthday. Please clap.

I am going to marry you.

Bought a new set of Odyssey golf clubs and they're shit, my round took me like ten years.

Who decided to call it a stillbirth and not a midwife crisis?

I live más, for those who lived menos.

jen ramos-eisen@jenramose.online · 2w ago

if this flag offends you i'll help you pack

I was grandfathered in to my grandmother.

Menopausa de hidratación.

*indignantly to my wife* There are no premature ejaculations on stolen land.