What do we burn besides witches? More witches!

Stopped smoking 🍃 and turns out I’m not as chill as I once thought.

Hi, I’m never on here, but let’s take a minute for the dress ✨

Whenever someone has an awful opinion I just imagine the Guitar Hero crowd booing at them.

To every person “struggling” with not deadnaming someone- I’ve gone by Ash most of my life, and no one has bat an eye. That is not my legal name. But when ~certain~ people find out my first name and immediately call me that, it gives me the ICK to my bones. So, uh, don’t do this. To anyone.

Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back to life.

Help, I’ve accidentally started dating the entire town in Sun Haven-

My bff just lost our 2057 day streak on Snapchat and I am unwell.

One time when I was 19 I was really drunk (shh) and needed to burp but didn’t know how to make myself burp and my neighbor (30+ with like 5 daughters) burped me like a baby by patting on my back. Wholesome and humbling.

Went on “X” and immediately got hit by a bot with some p3do ass bullshit. Literally mourn Twitter and what it used to be. Hate that goddamn app now. Not even worth trying to use.

My daughter has been asking me to blow bubbles for her lately, not to play with the bubbles, but so she can play with other toys and have bubbles around her??

four games that brought you comfort or helped you heal ✨

Got high and took myself on a walk. Now that’s what I call self care

I don’t know if y’all knew, but the cake is a lie.

Me, looking at a block of cheese and some milk in my fridge while the rest of my food is covered in ants

a cartoon dog is sitting at a table with a cup of coffee in front of a fire with the words this is fine .

ALT: a cartoon dog is sitting at a table with a cup of coffee in front of a fire with the words this is fine .

media.tenor.com

I wish I had more people to talk to over the phone/video chat because I am lonely and miss actually talking with people, even from afar.

Why did my best friend look me in the eyes today and go, “how many tabs do you have open?” She was not prepared for it to be 425 and was cry laughing at me. I may or may not have a problem.

My kitchen is infested with ants and they’re in all of my food and I have -300 dollars to my name, so that’s great.

Was on a walk last night and this lady approached and asks if we’ve seen a baby goat and we’re like.. Yeah, actually. We have no idea how it got in our pen but it’s her goat 😭 what are the odds she ran into us? She lives blocks away from where we do!

𓆱 ashole ☪︎ ֶ֢࣪⋆𓄃@immaterialghost.bsky.social · last yr.

We have miniature goats in the backyard and randomly yesterday another goat showed up?? And no one we know has any idea where it came from?? Someone just put another goat in our pen??

We have miniature goats in the backyard and randomly yesterday another goat showed up?? And no one we know has any idea where it came from?? Someone just put another goat in our pen??

Instagram decided to switch up my recommended send to accounts for reels from people I send them to all the time to random people and it recommended my dead sister first ☠️

My daughter (2.7yrs) knocked out her front tooth 😭☠️ She’s okay, just not gonna have a front tooth until her adult one grows in at like 7+

Screaming at the sunshine, singing in the rain ✨

Thinking about the girl who showed up to a party I went to with Pedialyte. She’s a real one

Sound aura ✨ Top artists

Happy day the Caesar salad was invented and that’s it ✨

My mom thought SpongeBob would make me stupid, so I wasn’t allowed to watch it. (Jokes on her, I’m stupid anyways.)

Today my friend told me she had the “suds” and I had to ask her what that meant and she said, “Oh, I forget you weren’t allowed to watch SpongeBob” ah, my lack of SpongeBob has finally caught up to me.