It's gotta be freeing to live with that little embarrassment

Wife's got a work friend over so I made pulled pork 'nachos' over home fries for everyone. Very much a "we're not going out later" meal.

OHIO RADIO AD: every kid in the USA is a gay trans commie now and Sherrod Brown personally surgeried them with his own scalpel ME: no way anyone believes this cartoonish bullshit HALF OF OHIO: omg who knew, I better vote for Bribey McDatacenter, thanks for the info you selfless oligarchs

They took away 'hide all from' as an option for shitty Facebook accounts in my feed. Now I get 'interested/not interested' and a chance to snooze the account for 30 days. This is like falling off the Titanic, being dragged onto a lifeboat, then having the captain steal your oar for kindling.

Crazy slow day on my sales platforms, no new messages, fall is in the air and I feel melancholy and invisible. Better go post about it on the platform where I get zero engagement

Wastin' away again with Tommy Tuberville Lookin' for some hot pics of your junk Some people claim that only furries fly planes But I know, that's how dumb coaches talk

I'd rather not elaborate further, but you ever think maybe they got the wrong guy?

I know he had funny social media for a minute there but we all know Gavin Newsom would absolutely try to kick the football every single time Lucy promised she wouldn't pull it back, right?

Another day of breathtaking competence

Fifth Third Bank: if we rename enough ballparks after ourselves, you might stop wondering why our name is so awkward and stupid (tm)

"Keith, cards on the table here. "Dinnertime is still seven long hours away. "Yet thanks to special interests (that stupid other cat) my bowl is already EMPTY at a critical juncture. "Our deadline for zoomies and windowsill nap is fast approaching. "Can you rush a churu donation?" - DemoCat

Dems pissing down their own legs about anti-trans attack ads are just honoring one of America's time-honored traditions: allowing the shittiest assholes in the country to completely set the narrative and lead them around by the nose in an endless game of stop-hitting-yourself

If they're willing to treat Mitch McConnell, one of their own architects of evil, this badly at the end of his service to their nihilistic cause, imagine how little they give a shit what happens to you, a far less useful idiot

"Hear me out... what if we let them win the midterms, but then gas gets so expensive they can't afford to run the equipment to tear down the Kennedy Center? Ehh? EHHHH???" - Democratic strategists probably

Putting my own harm-reduction theories to a sore test by voting this fall for Marcy Kaptur, a 900-year-old do-nothing Republican-lite built for an era when the most strenuous thing she'd have to do was cut ribbons at the opening of new shopping plazas, because her opponents are so vehemently evil

EXT: remote third world village KID: Hey everyone! New t-shirts are here! Someone must have lost a sports game in America! [opens BOX to reveal 75,000 pointing-Joe-Biden "I did that!" stickers] KID: what the fuck?

Made a breakfast bowl with tater tots, spam, egg, mushroom, onion, green pepper and cheese. Did I garnish it with Texas Pete hot sauce and a slivered piece of pickled okra? Yes I did, and I demand a food truck immediately.

Be it known that my 6,666th feedback on Discogs was a very nice comment about an evangelical praise and worship CD I sold to someone. Amen!

New evidence exposes the Radio Star's checkered past and may exonerate Video altogether. Check out my 12-part podcast, BUGGLED.

Guess if we didn't want the Kennedy Center bulldozed we shouldn't have burnt the pot roast

Bill Hader is Will Forte's Wario

"Where's Waldo?" she said, and smiled in her special way

The rings granted them long life and wealth, but slowly consumed them. Their physical bodies faded until they became invisible spirits completely enslaved to the One Ring and Sauron's will.

I saw this banner at a red light and reading it made my pants shit other pants

I'm just a Juggalo And everywhere I go People know the pop I'm sprayin'

Sat down to debug a 7-month-old game I thought was done, got an idea for yet another new one, sort of a roguelike where you clear a path by forming adjacent Yahtzee hands and occasionally uncovering monsters, traps or powerups. Let's see how far I get on this one.

Listing $2 items on Vinted only to have people immediately offer $1.25, then favorite the item after I decline their offer, as if to say "I'll be here when you come to your senses and negotiate with a real shark."

Noodles and Company equals Noodles and Tragedy plus Noodles and Time.

"We've gone from a president who couldn't stay awake to a president who refuses to sleep." - Scott Bessent

ConCon is going great