Me, whispering in your ear, in a tone of mild desperation, for the rest of our lives: Hey. Is this funny? Is this anything?

Today I will treat myself to a coffee that someone else made. This is luxury.

I don't know what to say. I open up Canva and art just spills out of me.

I should be able to tell youtube not to recommend videos to me about products that cost more than $100.

Gonna eat a block of tofu and relax tonight.

If you're in love with me let me know and I'll put you on the list.

I had a tuna sandwich and now all I need is to experience ever-lasting love and acceptance.

Felt good to turn down a friend request from some Austin comedy loser who makes "prank" videos where he acts like he's trans in a grocery store and everyone is really nice and patient with him

I love when a creator says "if you know someone like this, send them this video". I would have totally forgotten to do that. I'm a real airhead in that way.

One thing I can tell you for sure is you don't listen to The B-52's enough.

I should buy a can of new england clam chowder y/n

Full moon's gonna be soothing this time, folks. Gonna get a nice buzz offa that sucker. A nice gentle hum. And maybe a little horny. YA MIGHT get boned up.

Not another pastrami, they say! Ralph, you can't do this! Cowards, all.

Look at me. You know I'm listening to the new Weezer album. Doesn't mean I have to like it.

I keep my phone in grayscale because colors are too stimulating to me. I lay eyes on a nice fuchsia and I go into an absolute tizzy.

I am known far and wide as a degenerate energy drinker.

Ohhhhhh a literal living angel leaves this earth and suddenly my little "bits" aren't doing as well. OKAY.

I am a very stupid man

She's still here, guys. It's ok.

I did a cover of a Chris Gaines song for this episode. I tried to make it sound like Atari Teenage Riot. 'member them? They were fun if you like yelling (I do). youtu.be/a6tsZKLZ-zQ?...

Atari Teenage Riot "Sick to Death"

YouTube video by Atari Teenage Riot

youtu.be

Rose-Colored Headphones@rchpodcast.bsky.social · 6d ago

Out now: Stephen Deusner joins us as we try to figure out what exactly was going on with that whole Garth Brooks / Chris Gaines thing, and Ralph re-images a Chris Gaines classic. Subscribe to Rose-Colored Headphones wherever you get podcasts! @stephendeusner.bsky.social #garthbrooks #chrisgaines

You can save posts when they are in danger.

[deep breath] some day my brain will function properly [exhale]

If you recognize this man, you’re going to love (?) our next episode. Special thanks in advance to @stephendeusner.bsky.social

Found a corgi if anybody's interested in gazing upon them.

I like Jack White. I believe be has made some great contributions to art and culture. But I also believe this mother fucker needs to practice a little more.

Why hadn't I listened to Luther Vandross until now? Because I had not yet ascended. I am now one with the universe.

I took such a beautiful, artistic photo of my kid's nachos yesterday. Sunlight coming through the window at an angle, deep shadows, "THANK" visible on the plastic bag beside it.

Watching the thoughts float by like a torn-off bit of nudie mag.

Tell people when you like them! They probably feel like ass almost all the time! Say it! Risk some temporary embarrassment!

Just saw a guy with a shirt that said "VIDEO GAMES" with a generic-looking controller underneath. It was what an alien might wear if they were impersonating a human.