A good friend of mine said that he's quitting the Reggae band as its triangle player. When I asked him why, he told me he was bored because it was just the same ting, night after night.
Leftbobgolfer
@leftbobgolfer.bsky.social
Allergic to magat morons, love dogs and love those deserving of 2nd chances. Always happy to follow back.
If someone calls you "fat" just ignore them. You're much bigger than that!
I have great memories of my redneck dad while growing up. He actually still walked me to school at age 11. But that's because we were in the same grade!
You probably don't know how to get rich in the field of metallurgy. I don't either, but you can start by mining your own bismuth!
What do you call a famous singer with yellow eyes? Elton Jaundice!
A psychic walks into the store and the clerk hands her a sweater, size large. "Oh, that isn't going to fit." "How do you know without trying it on???" asked the clerk. "Because I'm a medium!"
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met!
Canadians overwhelmingly demand wealth tax after Kevin O’Leary says it will make him move away
Canadians overwhelmingly demand wealth tax after Kevin O’Leary says it will make him move away
OTTAWA - Pollsters report a split among Canadians over the idea of higher tax on the assets of wealthy individuals, though support skyrockets after noting that Kevin O'Leary has vowed that he will res...
thebeaverton.com
It was cute when my daughter started dressing like a dolphin but now her act is wearing fin!
Where did Phil Collins record all of his albums? In the Stu Stu studio!
What do skinny jeans and the Whitehouse have in common??? No ballroom!
Do you know why the bicycle didn't drink alcohol??? Because he couldn't handle bars!
I used to work as a lifeguard until some blue kid got me fired!
I was at the public pool and started peeing in the deep end. The lifeguard blew their whistle SO loud that I almost fell in!
The "No new wars" president is never going to end this war without getting even less than he had before the war. History will mock everything Trump did, but this war is going to get special mention.
5 years ago exactly, my best buddy ever, Bella on her last car ride. I couldn't even look at a picture of her for the first 2 years without tears. We got baby Stella 8 days later because I couldn't take the quiet in our house and because my family was tired of seeing me cry. Rip sweet girl. 💔
A-HA! The social media time waster sniffer dog seems to have caught another one!
Happy Friday everybody, we made it! 4:30 can't come soon enough. Willow was happy to hear that I'm going to be off after today! Have a fantastic Friday!
You think Trump will ever see a jail cell??? Serious question. I'm going to say no. If they haven't done it by now, for his very obvious crimes, I just don't think it's likely.
Happy Thursday everybody! This pic taken 4 years ago of my sweet little Stella buddy. Smartest and kindest dog I've ever known! I'm off for 2 weeks after tomorrow. Just can't wait to get away somewhere! Cheerio!
I thought that my foot got caught on something when I was walking but when I looked, there was nothing there. I must be tripping!
Do you know how researchers know that babies are afraid of the supernatural??? Because they all cried during their first out of body experience!
I told my therapist that I had some serious commitment issues. She agreed to see me again, but I never went back!
The world's largest pickle is being displayed at the state fair. Many people said that they don't understand all the hype, while others have pointed out that it's a pretty big dill.
When can 3 elephants stand under ONE umbrella and not get wet??? When it's not raining!