Contractor called: “hey, the job we had before you is delayed. Any chance we could start you tomorrow?” After a mad dash of clearing the current patio and about a 1/4 of the yard. Looks like work will start on the new patio tomorrow. So excited for those cool autumn nights now

Spent the day in the woods. Setting trail cams, clearing trails, sprucing up the raised blind, and plinking. Finished the day with bourbon and a trip to the taco truck. So excited for hunting season. Bow practice and clays next weekend.

And if you pressed the filter together until it popped, it became a menthol

These surprisingly cool mornings have me daydreaming about deer stands and duck blinds

There’s poop on the lettuce. There’s worms in the beef. There’s glass in the bread. What kind of Upton Sinclair timeline is this

The alcohol in a martini should be enough to kill the parasite in my ceasar salad, and then I'll pair it with fries, which are safe

In capitalist America, Taco Bell is our CDC and Waffle House is our weather alert system.

me at any given point of the day

Can’t believe Miranda Priestly dies at the end 💔

It's the 250th anniversary of America's independence, and the King of England made a trip here, addressed our Congress, and lectured them about checks on executive power. Pour one out for historians, satirists, and the founders.

Golf was invented so people would know how big hail was

If both the Pope and the King of England are telling you to get your shit together, you need to get your shit together.

A British king named Charles lecturing the Americans about checks on executive power. Pour one out for the historians and satirists.

The coolest part of being alive in 2026 is how everything is like $1,000 dollars

Dr Bronner, visibly drunk: and tell ‘em you can brush your teeth with it

I should be allowed to connect to the mycelium network

My five year plan is to see how it goes

Venison meatballs over spaghetti on the patio tonight. Only about 10-15lbs of venison left in the freezer. 6ish months until I can get more - guess I’ll be fishing this summer to get us through. Trying to mostly survive off game meat is fun when the grocery still exists

It’s always “support queer owned businesses” until it comes to Palantir apparently 😒

I don’t wanna hear about how much water AI uses if you’re a bottom

I remember when the Strait of Hormuz and Walmart used to be opened 24 hours

I remember when the Strait of Hormuz and Walmart used to be opened 24 hours

Beautiful night to spend on the patio. Put together some sliders made with beef from the farm we hunt. Fries, a good pickle, and Ale-8 Pawpaw (and vodka) on the side.

Touching grass is not enough I need to connect to the mycelium network

“But shall this crazed old man be tamely suffered to drag a whole ship’s company down to doom with him?”

“But shall this crazed old man be tamely suffered to drag a whole ship’s company down to doom with him?”

I’m so moonpilled. I’m lunarmaxxing.

Apollo 8 had Earthrise Artemis II had Earthset (and a total solar eclipse)