Mike Pielocik
@mikepie.bsky.social
tv writer (@hignfyus.bsky.social, Late Show, Tonight Show, Desus & Mero, Nightly Show, Smart Pipe, Sex House, ONN).
If we're going to have the death penalty there should be a rule where when you fuck up administering the death penalty you get the death penalty
The Washington Post@washingtonpost.com · last wk.Tennessee Gov. Bill Lee (R) said he was halting all scheduled executions for the rest of 2026 and ordering a “comprehensive, third-party review to determine exactly what occurred.” Read more about Christa Pike’s failed execution here: https://wapo.st/4rCorF8
“Jack Smith, you say that Michelle Williams should’ve won the Oscar for Brokeback Mountain, but I contend that ZERO members of Destiny’s Child were in that movie.”
"Not my monkeys not my circus" I say to investigators, frantically using a tarp to cover the flashing neon sign that says "MIKE PIELOCIK'S SPECTACULAR MONKEY CIRCUS"
Not doing a lot of posting lately but just found out the German title of "Chicken Run" is "Hennen Rennen" - no way i'm keeping that to myself
‘Have I Got News For You’ is back!! CNN Tonight 9p/e. Tomorrow on CNN App & HBO Max
Gonna start saying "Neagley from the world of Reacher!" the way Perry White says "Great Caesar's Ghost!"
2016: lol the rich tv man from home alone 2 thinks he gonna be president 2026: i hope the gestapo gets the famous diarrhea
My favorite Sam Neil fact will always be that he designed a future Australian flag that replaces the union jack with the aboriginal flag for Event Horizon and insisted the film use it.
for having won so much these people are such fucking losers
Jay Willis@jaywillis.net · 3mo ago"Emil Bove had a picture of Donald Trump as his iPhone wallpaper" sounds like the kind of dumb joke I would make to try and convey how MAGA brain-poisoned Trump's judges are. As it turns out, Emil Bove...actually had a picture of Donald Trump as his iPhone wallpaper.
“A nation that has allowed so much of that wealth to be held instead in the soft hands of a precious few” goes so hard
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 3mo agoMamdani: "As we mark 250 years ... we see the wealthiest country -- one where children go to sleep hungry while the world's first trillionaire hungers for more ... we see masked agents terrorizing our streets, eating food cooked by undocumented neighbors before spiriting them away in unmarked vans"
The Mighty Mighty Bosstones have not had a hit single since Biden pulled out of Afghanistan. Much to consider.
W.E.D.em Boyz@leftistwonk.bsky.social · 3mo agoI'm not sure there is a more cooked brain on the planet than Joe Rogan's
This weekend is the one-year anniversary of the release of my newest comedy special Positive Reinforcement! I'm really proud of it, and I'd really appreciate if you'd consider checking it out and/or sharing it with a friend! Thanks! :) www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAvN...
Josh Gondelman - Positive Reinforcement [2025] | FULL COMEDY SPECIAL
YouTube video by Blonde Medicine
youtube.com
I know this is not the biggest concern going these days, but it stresses me out that basically every artist/writer/critic is now expected to create their own tiny empire instead of getting paid by any existing entity to perform a job they've worked to get good at!!!!
You couldn’t make The Office today. It would take multiple days. A week at least.
35mm screening of Sam Raimi’s masterful 1998 thriller “A Simple Plan”
Erik Hane@erikhane.bsky.social · 4mo agoOkay but What would YOUR totally gratuitous White House lawn event be, if YOU were the mad king of a dying superpower
Season 3 Boardwalk Empire goon who gets brained with a bowling pin
alexis simpson is confused by display name changes@amutepiggy.bsky.social · 4mo agomy man looking like the baby from the Teletubby sun grew up to be an alcoholic
As my family grows, and interest rates being what they are, I would kill for the extra square footage of the backrooms.
on top of everything that sucks about that Washington Post podcast, having a show called "Make It Make Sense" in 2026 is very
Christopher: I’m just sayin Ton, Carlo’s new guy is a little weird. Guy’s always eating leaves and native ferns. Strange is all. Tony: I don’t care if he’s a wallaby or a jackalope or a marsupi-whatever. He’s a good earner! Paulie: Wallaby damned. You hear what I said skip? I said “wallaby damned.”
batman, gnomes high fiving, pennywise, batman, batman, weird violin, count dooku, and the rest are genitals
Michael Hobbes@michaelhobbes.bsky.social · 5mo agoTIL the infamous "inkblot test" always uses the same 10 inkblots
A good name for a fun morgue would be “Our Bodies Our Shelves.”
I just preordered @thomas-elrod.com's novel The Franchise which sounds unbelievably up my alley, truly cannot wait to read bookshop.org/p/books/the-...
The Franchise
Check out The Franchise - <p><b>A </b><b>Most Anticipated Title from <i>Men'sHealth</i>, </b><b><i>FanFiAddict</i>, <i>The Nerd Daily</i>, and <i>Transfer Orbit</i></b><b>!</b><br><b><i><br>Game of Thrones</i> meets <i>The Truman Show</i> in this epic tale of a Hollywood-owned fantasy world where nothing is quite as it seems to the people who live and die at the studio’s whim.</b><br><br><i>A land filled with magic and dragons and wizards and warriors.</i><br><i>Thousands of people live and work within its borders, fearful of their enemies and loyal to their king.</i><br><br>The classic fantasy world of The Malicarn has been brought to life on the big screen in a series of phenomenally successful blockbuster movies, almost entirely populated by characters in total belief that their sham fantasy lives are real.<br><br>A fan-favorite actor finds himself doubting the studio's work, but this franchise has an almost unstoppable momentum, and bringing freedom to a population that already believes itself to be free won’t be as easy as he thinks.</p> by Thomas Elrod on Bookshop.org US!
bookshop.org