He's SILL grumpy. And it wasn't about the cancer thing.

"Patooey."

He's too grumpy to care.

"Woooow. Consider yourself cancelled on Bluesky dot com! Yes! I have cancer! Every day, every minute, every second for eternity!"

"Since when did we decide to turn this around back on ME. I'm not involved in this! So take a hike! Before Gargamel comes looking for you."

"Serving up a hot plate of realness at this hour? At least let me get some change for the dry cleaners since you wanna play DIRTY. Besiiiides... Water under the bridge. That's not important. We're talking about Cyclops."

"What's sad is watching Slim yearn like a high school loverboy."

"Maybe! But I'm SOOOO down for the shippening. I already make my limited editon, collectable Cyclops and Wolverine figures scissor."

Draaamaaaaa.

So what'd ya do to the missus this time? Skipped out on a dinner date? Emotionally unavailable? Reduced him to a side piece with zero benefits? All of the above???? Spideytorch is a thing of the past! Either you better get some chocolates, flowere, and cook up some heat resistant rubbers ++

-ˋˏ┈𝐏𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐏.@asticky-menace.bsky.social · 2d ago

…Wade— Wade please—

// Hehehehoohoo hahaha!

// I'm funny

// ME !

Ohohhh? Looks like I got some good leverage on Spidey afterall! Boytoy Johnny Storm being a hothead? Just imagine the press coverage on that one! You'd have to disappear entirely. Make everyone forget your name and who you are!

-ˋˏ┈𝐏𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐏.@asticky-menace.bsky.social · 2d ago

…Wade— Wade I’ll buy you all of the chimichangas. Get my piggy bank out and everything. Just don’t… tell Johnny that.

Different Peter — Don't even worry about it, peanut! I made it up! Caught me in a lie! I love lying for fun. Especially to strangers — Even more if it's on the internet! Like about you peeing beds. Pretty sure Johnny's got the reach to get that out there. He wouldn't happen to be mad at you?

-ˋˏ┈𝐏𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐏.@asticky-menace.bsky.social · 2d ago

…Fine! Fine, don’t tell MJ that! Not that she’d believe you, but still…! And you gotta elaborate later. There’s no WAY you can’t tell me after that

Chimichanga time, Spidey! Can't you hear the roaring of a hungry belly at play? You gonna let me go without food? I have CANCER. You wouldn't starve a man with cancer, would you? Chimichangas in my mouth pronto! Or I'll tell MJ you peed the bed.

-ˋˏ┈𝐏𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐏.@asticky-menace.bsky.social · 2d ago

…What? No, wait. Wade?? There’s what? What do you mean—

Well .. There's ... Itsy-Bitsy. . . . Let's not talk about that actually! Wow! I'm starved! Chimichangas, anyone???

-ˋˏ┈𝐏𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐏.@asticky-menace.bsky.social · 2d ago

Do NOT

Peter and I have kids, too.

Do I? The answer is yes! But how could I dare turn down the opportunity to say something so heinous just to get your jimmies in a rustle! The spider-panties in a bunch.

Yes, peanut?

🕷️ 👉👌

BB FRANK?! I miss you too, Castle <3 my bb. Always! Hugs and kisses!

More holes welcome. Tag that as improper use-

Do tell us more about your holes, Spider-Man. I know a couple of people reading along who are VERY interested in this information.

Are you sure? Cause I could totally get in contact with a guy who could make that happen.

Stand down, Penis Parker!

You can't keep my kids from me..!

Can it, spider. I'm having a dispute with my ex wife. She still misses me. But her aim's getting better!!!

I hope my sweet boy Kurt's doing all right. Papa needs to visit him.

Shhhhhh. Let's not fight itsy-bitsy. I'm a lover not a fighter! Sort of. Depends on the day, the pay, and my overall mood. Anywho! You. Me. Time for a bromantic embrace that blurs the line between platonic and very very sexually exciting.