no more taglines like this because of hipaa laws.

giardia angel

take down the doorbell cameras, too. stop giving a shit if the delivery person treats your boxes with enough kindness or why someone is getting the mail at 10pm.

@jaymilton.bsky.social iowa is one of the few states to have both a coulee and bayou.

i've seen 2 vehicles that had kc hi-lites (or at least the covers) on a light bar in the past week. would've guessed that company went out of business in the great recession, but probably doing okay just from the bigfoot/marty mcfly truck nostalgia people.

mom and dad are visiting, it's the only time of the year i put a roll of toilet paper on the actual roll holder, to let them believe they did an okay job of raising me.

merkurial is how you describe someone who reminds you of ford's european cars that were sold in america.

margaritaville's low functioning city government exercised no oversight of police department, report finds

i've lived across from a sports bar for over a decade. -single game championships, there's a dropoff in the crowd size from the quarters/semis to the finals. people go elsewhere to watch it. this is consistent across all sports. -for multi-game playoff or championship series, the crowd size grows.

simplest, most satisfying recent household repair: fixing the zipper slider on a couch cushion cover by squeezing it with some pliers.

i remember in school, the kids with behavioral problems getting pulled out of class once a week for their anger management program. i don't know what went on in that, but i imagine today it is a lot more "you have to just ignore everything, you need to figure out how to mute and block"

pandas are really slow. express doesn't even make sense for them.

if you waste time looking at shit on ebay, putting this in the ublock filters will get rid of the stupid live event video: www.ebay.com##body:xpath('//*[contains(@class,"live-event")]')

i can't do that much sugar. can you turn the lemons into something else?

i'm gonna open a deli so i can name a sandwich after you and it will just be capers and mayonnaise.

i got a new butter dish recently, but it has an opaque cover, and i guess i still struggle with object permanence because i can't stand it. i need a clear glass one, i need to see the butter.

my diarrhea parasite and i would like to dance with you and your parasite. would you and your parasite like to dance with my parasite and me?

it's been ages since someone told me to have a neat summer.

switched to one of those kneeling chairs that reminds me of a school psychologist.

the 2 sponsors of my little league that i can recall are still in business, 35 years later. one is a tire shop (they were the good team), the other sells plants (my team).

i'm looking for new plates and bowls and the ones i am trying out right now are a huge dud. these so called soup bowls are too freaking thin. if you call something a soup bowl, i want to see the ceo hold a bowlful of hot soup in it for 60 seconds.

there's a guy in the neighborhood that's been practicing drums every afternoon. i could easily find him if i just walked outside while he was playing, but i'm going to point my amp out my window to see if we can get a neighborhood wide jam session going.

the joke was that the most boring thing was sitting through slideshows of peoples vacations, but instagram shows that people actually liked those.

you're watching michael clayton, and you're into it, so you're paying close attention. you see those horses, and you think "why do they have bridles on if they are just hanging out in a pasture? this is suspicious." but that's not it. it's something else, the bridle thing is never addressed.

saw an absolute battleship of a cadillac today, one of those 19 foot long mid-70s ones. always feel like i'd need to either grow tall enough to be called "slim" or wide enough to be called "pops" to pull off driving one of those on a daily basis.

i'm starting to suspect that the "you're what makes us great" emails i get from companies are not entirely sincere.

time saving tip: collect all of your product registration cards in one place, so you can sit down every 6 months to fill them out and mail them in all at once.

a ford pickup hauling a trailer-bus at the airport in "the spy who came in from the cold". the movie is full of stuff like this.

insiders are reporting that after 10+ years, i could be moving on from my libbey "vibe" glassware for something that is stackable and less of a menace in the dishwasher.