In my shop for clothes at Costco and skincare at Trader Joe's era

If your young child asks "Is Chucky real?" it is VERY IMPORTANT that you ask for clarification before continuing the discussion. He was talking about Mr. Cheese.

I'm starting to suspect a lot of people who organize summer festivities have never actually listened to the lyrics of Martina McBride's Independence Day

When I was in college we hired Vanilla Ice to play a big end of semester show. As I recall he played Ice Ice Baby and the song from the TMNT movie before turning on the smoke machines we told him not to use, setting off alarms and ending the evening.

Regular reminder that cabinet secretaries are not apolitical, no matter the department, and we don't do the military profession any favors by pretending that they are.

Loving my new Garmin watch but it can be real judgy

Kid 2 (born and raised in New England) just asked me to buy him Chicago Cubs and Bears tshirts. I must be doing something right.

Still can't go to bed before One Shining Moment even knowing it will be on YouTube tomorrow

Well below average on amount of time it took me to remember where the bunny hid all the eggs this Easter. Above average on amount of vomit and blood but I'll take what I can get.

Having kids in the way back of the minivan is really improving the accuracy of my left-handed throwing

Exciting mail day! I contributed a chapter on the United States, aka the one where Jess learned about the Stafford Act

I am baffled by the clothing choices on Survivor

This is much too late to START a basketball game

PSA even if your kid is old enough to not have potty accidents anymore you might want to keep a change of clothes on hand for bloody nose accidents 🫠🫠

The one school theme day I will never complain about is pajama day

Some days (weeks? months?) are really hard. Thankful for kind notes from students that remind me what it's all for.

Pro tip: if you bring sweats to change into after swimming laps so you don't have to put work clothes back on to run errands, it helps to also bring casual shoes. And a hair brush. Unrelated, if you saw me at the grocery store this evening, no you didn't.

Actual thing I said to Kid 2 tonight: "I'm sorry I yelled at you. I was covered in toilet water."

It's a "scream sing the bridge to Death by a Thousand Cuts even though you're happily married" kind of Wednesday

Did not expect celebrating positive strep tests to be such a regular part of parenting

Jess Blankshain@profjessblankshain.bsky.social · 7mo ago

Some day I will learn not to check my phone when a sick child wakes me up early

Some day I will learn not to check my phone when a sick child wakes me up early

Lessons learned from the Blizzard of '26: - snow filled ziplocs make great cooler ice packs to save your perishables - LED beanies are amazing, as are kid-friendly headlamps - try not to have both parents get the flu immediately before a blizzard

I love that the thing we apparently learned from the early days of the pandemic is that it's totally reasonable to expect people to supervise their children's virtual learning while also continuing to do their own jobs

I am complaining about day 2 at home now that I have the flu

Jess Blankshain@profjessblankshain.bsky.social · 8mo ago

Of all the days to be home with a sick kid, can't really complain about getting the one where we can watch skating and hockey finals live

Of all the days to be home with a sick kid, can't really complain about getting the one where we can watch skating and hockey finals live

For those playing along at home, the solution was to abandon the frozen pipe and reroute through the house creating more radiator. Did require a professional but was done in an hour.

Jess Blankshain@profjessblankshain.bsky.social · 9mo ago

Sooo anyone have tips for thawing a pipe in an inaccessible crawl space?

Sooo anyone have tips for thawing a pipe in an inaccessible crawl space?

Scotch magic tape is wonderful but Scotch gift-wrap tape is an abomination. Don't make my mistake.

Pro tip: middle of a Patriot's game is a great time to go to Market Basket

Toddler figured out how to get a leg over the top of the crib rail send help