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Roy Huerto

@royhuerto.bsky.social

76-year-old progressive. 🚫MAGA,🚫troglodyte,🚫DM,🚫crypto,🚫Elon,🚫genocide. Life is short but the years are long. Baál is Lord. If you want me to follow back, you need posts and followers. Otherwise it’s the Cornfield for you.

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Roy Huerto@royhuerto.bsky.social · yesterday

As Teams and Outlook went down worldwide, Microsoft moved quickly to reassure customers that the outage had nothing to do with its CEO having an affair, a possibility customers began considering immediately after reading the statement.

As Teams and Outlook went down worldwide, Microsoft moved quickly to reassure customers that the outage had nothing to do with its CEO having an affair, a possibility customers began considering immediately after reading the statement. “Our engineers have isolated the issue,” a spokesperson said. “We can confirm it’s affecting servers in multiple regions and zero marriages.” Microsoft promised a full explanation as soon as it could get everyone on Teams, and that their CEO is still loyal to his CoPilot. Follow Islamica News for the latest Word, Excel, Powerpoint, and Outlook. #satire #microsoft #comedy #news The Onion
Roy Huerto@royhuerto.bsky.social · yesterday

Jackalope 393 Killed Along Wyoming Highway, Wild Population Drops to 23 ALCOVA, Wyo. - Wyoming Conservation Services has confirmed that Jackalope 393 was struck and killed by a vehicle Tuesday morning along Highway 220.

Jackalope 393 Killed Along Wyoming Highway, Wild Population Drops to 23 ALCOVA, Wyo. - Wyoming Conservation Services has confirmed that Jackalope 393 was struck and killed by a vehicle Tuesday morning along Highway 220. 393, a mature male, had been monitored by wildlife officials for nearly four years and was frequently photographed throughout the Alcova and Pathfinder areas. His death reduces Wyoming's known wild jackalope population to just 23 animals. Officials said the driver stopped and immediately reported the collision. 393 was identified through the numbered tag attached to his right ear. Biologists recovered the animal shortly afterward and said his remains will be preserved for research. Wildlife officials are reminding motorists to watch for jackalopes near highways, particularly around dawn and dusk. Of the remaining 23 animals, only seven are believed to be breeding males. The image is of a jackalope, a legendary rabbit-looking animal with deer antlers. This is from Casper Planet, a known satire site.
Roy Huerto@royhuerto.bsky.social · 2d ago

Casper Planet, Facebook Man Identifying Himself as “Meth-Man” Arrested After Methmobile Breaks Down During Police Chase CASPER, Wyo.- A Casper man identifying himself as “Meth-Man” was arrested Tuesday after a brief police pursuit ended when his homemade “Methmobile” broke down.

Man Identifying Himself as “Meth-Man” Arrested After Methmobile Breaks Down During Police Chase CASPER, Wyo.- A Casper man identifying himself as “Meth-Man” was arrested Tuesday after a brief police pursuit ended when his homemade “Methmobile” broke down. Police attempted to stop the 44-year-old man after receiving reports of a suspicious vehicle covered in homemade metal armor driving through downtown Casper. The driver refused to stop. The pursuit lasted approximately four minutes before the heavily modified 1989 Honda began smoking and coasted to a stop. Police said the vehicle had been fitted with scrap metal, homemade fins and several pieces of sheet metal apparently intended to resemble a Batmobile. The driver exited wearing a dirty homemade superhero costume and reportedly announced, “Meth-Man doesn't surrender.” He surrendered approximately 11 seconds later. Officers said the man claimed the Methmobile normally has “way more horsepower.” It was towed from the scene.
Roy Huerto@royhuerto.bsky.social · 4d ago

Casper Planet, Facebook Family Emerges From Wyoming Wilderness After Generations of Isolation Since 1920s JACKSON, Wyo.- Officials are assisting a family that emerged from the wilderness near Grand Teton NP last week after apparently living completely isolated from society for nearly a century.

Family Emerges From Wyoming Wilderness After Generations of Isolation Since 1920s JACKSON, Wyo.- Officials are assisting a family that emerged from the wilderness near Grand Teton National Park last week after apparently living completely isolated from modern society for nearly a century. The family's identities and current location are being withheld for their protection. According to officials familiar with the situation, the family's ancestors traveled into the mountains of western Wyoming during the 1920s after becoming convinced that modern civilization was approaching its end. They never returned. Instead, several generations of the family continued living in an isolated mountain settlement, surviving through hunting, fishing, trapping, gardening and livestock. Current family members reportedly had no knowledge of the internet, television, commercial air travel or most major events of the past century. They knew the United States still existed but believed most large cities had eventually been abandoned. Officials said the family did possess several books, old newspapers and other materials carried into the wilderness by their ancestors. The newest newspaper recovered from the settlement was dated 1927. The family reportedly decided to leave after several years of increasingly difficult winters and declining livestock numbers. They walked for several days before encountering hikers. Officials initially believed they were dealing with lost campers until conversations revealed that none of the family members knew where they were supposed to return.A small team later traveled with one family member back into the mountains. They located several cabins, livestock pens, food-storage structures and cultivated ground in a valley not visible from established trails. Some of the buildings are believed to be nearly 100 years old. No roads lead to the settlement. Officials said the family is healthy and currently being introduced gradually to modern society. Their exact location will not be released. The settlement will also remain closed to the public. Researchers are now attempting to reconstruct the family's history and determine how multiple generations managed to remain almost completely separated from the outside world. Officials said one of the family's first questions after learning about modern society was whether the world had ended yet. They were told no. Casper Planet, Facebook
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 6d ago

FOX NEWS: The DSA had a really good night. But Third Way has cautioned against reading too much into that MAMDANI: I'm sure they have 😀

Roy Huerto@royhuerto.bsky.social · last wk.

James Carville crowns GOP’s only ‘winner’ after Trump’s heir bungles midterm push. It’s DeSantis if you don’t want to read it. This makes some opportunistic sense.

James Carville crowns GOP’s only ‘winner’ after Trump’s heir bungles midterm push

Veteran Democratic strategist James Carville singled out the one Republican he believes walked away from the GOP's election night drubbing stronger than before.Speaking in a Wednesday episode of "Poli...

rawstory.com

Roy Huerto@royhuerto.bsky.social · last wk.

There is widespread confusion among Democrats this morning, after they accidentally won the US midterms despite their best efforts to lose. They now face their worst nightmare: enthused voters who actually expect something from them. Normal Island News, Facebook

There is widespread confusion among Democrats this morning, after they accidentally won the US midterms despite their best efforts to lose. They now face their worst nightmare: enthused voters who actually expect something from them. They are weighing up whether to condemn James Talarico and Abdul El-Sayed for giving people false hope, or pretend to be just like them. Perhaps the smart move will be to take the credit, just like that kid who pushes a train in that meme. Whichever way they go, there’s no denying this is awkward. Ordinarily, Democrats prefer a tiny majority, so they can assign two bad cops to block every bill they introduce. Now they’ll either have to not introduce bills or pray that Trump vetoes them. Given the President spends half his time sleeping and can’t even finish his sentences, this is a risky strategy. There is every chance that Americans end up with something good entirely by accident. I wouldn’t even rule out Trump forgetting to veto the release of the Epstein files. As you can imagine, the corporate donors who own both sides have steam coming out of their ears. Democrats were so determined to lose that one of them endorsed a Republican to stop a Muslim from taking Michigan. Unfortunately, 60% of Michigan’s Jews turned out to be antisemites and voted for Halal law and Sharia meat. Chuck Schumer and Haley Stevens are losing their fucking minds. It’s fair to say neither side wanted a blue wave to sweep across the US. Unfortunately, the Republicans’ strategy of saying a load of racist stuff and doing endless war backfired. Americans are only in favour of those things when they can afford fuel and groceries. Now that everything’s getting expensive, they are going cold on the whole imperialism thing. President Trump was left scratching his head, wondering how he lost so badly, despite winning the Iran war 27 times this year.
Roy Huerto@royhuerto.bsky.social · 2w ago

WASHINGTON—Hoping for a last-minute boost to their midterm campaigns, on Monday Democrats across the US beseeched Rep. Haley Stevens to endorse their Republican opponents. … Meanwhile, in Ohio, Vivek Ramaswamy thanked Stevens for “making people briefly forget what an asshole I am.”

Andy Borowitz (@borowitzreport)

With Abdul El-Sayed smashing fundraising records in the immediate aftermath of her defection to his GOP rival, other Democratic candidates are hoping for their share of what they are calling “that Hal...

substack.com

Roy Huerto@royhuerto.bsky.social · 2w ago

The upheaval began early in the administration. DOGE engineered staff firings, and encouraged others to resign across the federal bureaucracy. Within a year, N.I.H. staffing had shrunk by one-fifth. The N.S.F.’s ranks were reduced by a third. Even NASA lost 20 percent of its employees with Ph.D.s.

How Trump Is Dismantling America’s Scientific Research Machine

The system that has driven life-altering discoveries and helped make the United States a superpower is now under intense strain.

nytimes.com

Roy Huerto@royhuerto.bsky.social · 2w ago

BREAKING: Donald Trump reportedly canceled all his remaining campaign events because his staff looked into the social media profiles of the RSVPs and it looked like at least a third of the attendees were hardcore liberals intending to yell instantly viral insults at him.

The Halfway Cafe (@thehalfwaycafe)

BREAKING: Donald Trump reportedly canceled all his remaining campaign events because his staff looked into the social media profiles of the RSVPs and it looked like at least a third of the attendees w...

substack.com

Roy Huerto@royhuerto.bsky.social · 2w ago

"A Chinese company has started marketing a $1,000 A.I.-enabled device that tracks mosquitoes in flight and burns their wings off...The white, nearly brick-size machine quickly zapped mosquito after mosquito, each bursting into a green or blue flame with a tiny pop."

A Powerful Mosquito-Hunting Laser Uses A.I. to Zap Winged Pests

Using sensors developed for self-driving cars, a Chinese start-up claims it can track and destroy tiny flying targets while avoiding people, pets and reflective surfaces.

nytimes.com