"The Secret Smile" contains songs that in some way deal with trauma, or the aftermath of it. "Broken" is about living with PTSD. I wanted to confront my trauma and examine it from a different perspective.

My new album "The Secret Smile" is out now! This is a five-song EP that explores trauma and its impact over a lifetime. #synthpop #pulseempire open.spotify.com/album/20cdNI...

The Secret Smile

open.spotify.com

Hey, everyone's favorite #ai president, Donald Trump, is back for the Trump Minute! #parody youtu.be/uoa2VSJnUGI?...

AI Donald Trump is Back for The Trump Minute

YouTube video by AI Music and Parody Central

youtu.be

This is a remix of my song "Pause The Pain" that I released in February. This is a #darkwave version (or goth) and I'm really pleased with how it turned out. #synthpop #darkwave #goth youtu.be/uCJvoqvNxnw?...

Pause The Pain (The Goth Remix)

YouTube video by Pulse Empire - Topic

youtu.be

I picked up a classic synth today, a Yamaha DX 27 keyboard. Right now I'm waiting on a USB MIDI connector so I can hook it up to my laptop.

2/2 What does she do? She just repeats the question again! Of course I'm starting to get frustrated, which can lead to a meltdown and I don't want to do THAT at an airport, surrounded by people.

I had a similar experience on Frontier Airlines flying back from Cleveland earlier this month. It appeared that I was going to miss a connecting flight, so I asked a gate agent about it and she asked me a question I didn't understand. I told her that I was autistic and didn't understand her. 1/2

At that point with the rude Walmart guy (he actually told me "we all have our jobs to do") when I was trying to get him to direct me to the damn hoodies, instead of just pointing vaguely in some direction, I had a Karen moment and demanded a supervisor. One came and she was wonderful.

Had a terrible experience recently at Walmart. Was trying to buy a simple hoodie and the person in the dept just pointed vaguely somewhere and I told them I was autistic and didn't understand what they meant. Another person came to "help" who was incredibly rude and condescending.

I'm at #cinemawasteland in Strongville, Ohio. This morning I met and had breakfast with Michael Berryman of "The Hills Have Eyes" fame. That was an odd experience. Also spoke with Cynthia Weintraub just now of "The Prowler" and "Humanoids of The Deep" fame who was absolutely delightful.

Just arrived in Strongsville, Ohio and I am #wastelanded

Just driving around this area again -- it's just surreal. And all of the memories of my previous life hear came flooding back. All of the laughter and good times we had. Our friends. I didn't expect to hit as hard as it did.

It's #worldautismawarenessday and I was first diagnosed in 2016. I would have been around 44. I had displayed symptoms my whole life really but no one recognized them until my last marriage. Which, ironically, was one of the reasons why that marriage ended. Life can be strange.

Moved into the home I'm sharing. One of my new roommates decided to take over my bed. The weird thing is, this place is super close to where I used to live in SE PDX, before moving to Montana. I never thought I'd return here, alone. Back to where I shared a life with someone & we were happy.

How hard is it to give away a ticket to Kraftwerk in Portland at Keller Auditorium on April 6? I have one to give away for free but no one wants it. No strings attached! I'm serious. I will be in Cleveland for Cinema Wasteland and can't go. Message me if you want it. #kraftwerk

Back to real life. I will be moving into my new place on the 1st. $900 a month to rent a room. Pretty expensive, but that's typical for this area. If I wanted a studio apt. it would be about $1300 a month at least.

I've been channeling the emotion into songs, which helps a little, but it's no replacement for the warm embrace of someone telling you everything's going to be okay, you know?

Being autistic, I'm having a hard time dealing with the sorrow and grief that comes from getting divorced. It's no joke. Sometimes I'm okay, and other times it just floods in. It's like being caught in an undertow when you're swimming in an ocean.

@kellycarlin.bsky.social I am living your dad's "a place for my stuff" routine. I've got stuff in a hotel in Oregon, a smaller version of my stuff now in a hotel in London, and am about to take an even smaller version of THAT to Paris.

Leaving for London tomorrow! It's been a dream destination of mine my whole life. I don't really have any concrete plans other than to explore the city. My hotel isn't in the best location, but it is close to a train.

I also booked a trip to the city of my birth (Cleveland) to attend next month's Cinema Wasteland! I've never been to any type of convention in my life because of my social anxiety. This event is geared towards horror movies. April 4-6! I'm very excited. cinemawasteland.com?target=page&...

Hey! It's a new song by my band, Pulse Empire. It'll be out in a few days on all of the major streaming platforms. I wrote it in support of the #trans community who especially need to be seen right now. youtu.be/11Kah1SGKYU?... #synthpop

Pulse Empire -- "She Always Believed"

YouTube video by Pulse Empire

youtu.be

I applied for one of Musk's AI tutor jobs. I figured I might as well try to make some money part-time from the richest man in the world. Of course when they track this account down there's no way they'd hire me.

I finally have leads on a couple of rooms to rent. I hope something works out, I can't stay in this hotel for too much longer. It was nearly $3K just for three weeks!

@maxgotjokes.bsky.social I enjoyed hanging out with you, Evasive, Laura, Guillermo and the person I could never get to tell her name (she kept saying it was Ralph Fiennes) for the Oscar night stream! You all seem like a great bunch of folks to spend time with.

Watched Drew Hancock's "Companion" yesterday. It's a quasi science fiction/horror film whose message, at least to me, doesn't seem to be interpreted by many, because I took it as a tale of abusive men. But I guess that's my life experience as an observer of such behavior. Check it out!

The plan is to do something social tonight. Maybe watch people sing karaoke, or do it myself if I can muster the courage. But to be honest, I'm so down I don't know if I can get myself to even go outside. I'll try. I miss my dogs. I miss my life.

In going through a divorce, you grieve in the same way you'd grieve over the death of someone. Having to go through this alone is super hard.

I didn't think it would be so hard to find a place to stay. It's like I'm dating again -- I'm not getting responses to the ads people are posting for their rooms for rent.

Oh! Here's another positive. There's this new casino (is tribal casino the correct way to say it?) not far from where I live. I used my gambling method of immediately cashing out after doubling my winnings. Spent $60 and left with about $350, not bad for an hour's entertainment.