*at the pearly gates* God: Show me something about your time on Earth that meant something personal to you. *opens phone and City Escape begins playing* Audio: Sonic. The Hedgehog. One of the greatest and most attractive characters ever thought up-"

Just browsed Reddit for a bit and got an ad that told me to try gambling in a mobile game instead of selling feet pics and now I’m wondering if theres mobile game devs out there losing sleep at night because of people selling feet pics to the degree they feel the need to advertise on Reddit about it

If there's a Jason Momoa hate club out there somewhere then they're eating good with the Minecraft movie. All he does is get absolutely destroyed physically and emotionally the entire movie.

Going to the BATHROOM at 3 AM because you accidentally consumed GLUTEN to trigger your CELIAC DISEASE (GONE WRONG)

Why does buying Nintendo consoles and games now require me to sell my home and take out a loan

Hi guys tomodachi life 2 is coming I will only exist in the real world for the next year then I shall depart to live in tomodachi life for the rest of my life thank you for understanding

good morning everyone the new Discord UI update is ass

PTCGP, this is the 7th week in a row you've buffed water decks in class

Your early 30s means when you sleep anywhere except your own bed you wake up and your shoulders are so stiff you wonder if you dislocated them in your sleep.

Everyone who says "Yes?" in response to you saying "Oh my god" is just actually a narcissist in disguise and I have no idea why they think that joke doesn't just immediately out them as such.

hey mutuals just wanted to say thanks for continuing to post about your weird hyperfixations all hours of the day so when i forget to log in here for days at a time i come back to endless content to read that tickles me right in my autism

Everyone out here freaking out about the Switch 2 and I'm online shopping looking at wormlights for the original Game Boy. I don't own an original Game Boy.

*wakes up from week long covid induced hibernation* Hooray now I can return to life before this happened. ... ... ... ... Oh god.

Dying and gaining entry to hell and satan immediately sends you to the bottom level where all you do is select Pokemon TCG Pocket wonder picks that has 4/5 cards you want but you will only ever get the one you didn't want.

Returning to Bluesky after a few days (a nice warm hug) vs returning to Twitter after a few days (Getting kicked in your no no zone)

I loved the new Sonic movie. My favorite part was the new Minecraft trailer that played before and the guy sitting behind me groaned in anguish in the first 5 seconds and said "oh god why" as soon as Jack Black showed up.

Will Mufasa finally be the one to convince Disney that we're all sick of live action remakes/versions of classic animated films that are significantly worse than the original and barely anyone talks about after a few weeks after release while the animated classics are still beloved for decades? No.

Doordash is so funny no other job can I get paid like 7 dollars an hour to deliver someone taco bell they ordered while drunk out of their mind. Then have them request me to hand the order directly to them and have them ask me where I bought my Kirby shirt because they wanted one.

No one told me growing up and no longer being a Toys R Us Kid would be this fucking rough.

Geoff Keighley strikes me as the kind of guy who made his friends use the shitty third party controller when they played video games with him as a child.

Fs in the chat when this fucking card drops and Misty continues her unchecked rampage on TCG Pocket

Hey butterfly app just wanted to update I have now married the disgusting monster and now he sits in my house all day contributing nothing like all the other marriage candidates.

SillyPlum@sillyplum.bsky.social · 2y ago

Someone made a stardew valley mod where you can date and marry a disgusting monster from the sewers and have to earn the approval of his strict monster family as a lowly human and i know how i'll be spending the remainder of the week

No I am afraid I cannot go out with you this evening I am in my 30s I simply do not have time for your frivolities *resumes YouTube documentary on Dan Schneider or boogie2988*

Someone made a stardew valley mod where you can date and marry a disgusting monster from the sewers and have to earn the approval of his strict monster family as a lowly human and i know how i'll be spending the remainder of the week

Every job should have an automated call off line with an option for "i have discovered a new hyperfixation and will no longer care for the real world in any capacity for the next week" as a reason. And if your boss fights you on it they immediately get banished to the sadsack bad vibes dimension.

Ppl always looking for proof we're living in the wrong timeline, look no further than the fact it's been more than 10 years without a sequel to Tomodachi Life.

Imagine an issue. Wrong, it's more complicated than that

Happy to announce I won the rematch for an argument I had 5 years ago. This time on my home turf 💪 (inside my mind)

*Mewtwo promo card is locked to the premium pass in TCG Pocket* *2 week trial already up*