Twitter sucks. I like animal twitter but the blue checks need to be put somewhere, something wrong with them. Of course "Captain K-Hole" is too busy being racist and stupid to run his businesses, so it's a mess. How the hell is SpaceX worth that much? there's no built out product beyond Earth Orbit.

Took my shirt off and now it is hot outside? Coincidence? I think not, I apologize, just rolled in sugar/sand mixture and took an Axe bath, in which my assistant sprays me with Axe body spray and then ignites it on my body. I am trying to sell this to Rogan as a "full cleanse"

Trying to spread the word about bootcut jeans.

Getting word that Styx has been spotted entering MSG as well as both a Moody Blues tribute band and Buckcherry, the Swelce Wedding is really shaping up to be....something.

Sometimes I feel like I should post more, trying to elucidate my theory about the expansion of the universe, but ain't nobody got time for that. I think it (the theory) would work, but how do you prove it practically and have it match observations? Since elements of the theory are unknown unknowns.

@scottaukerman.bsky.social i was listening to the throwback tour episode posted today, and I am shocked that BCB was both a Spin Doctors fan, and that his favorite song was not "Little Miss Can't Be Wrong" considering his contempt for his audience as the Merlin of Minestrone.

They are building a circus on the White House lawn? Is there a stunt show?

I too, am signing an executive order related to Mail-In voting. The Grimace is now eligible to run for Alabama Lt. Governor. Thank you for your attention to this matter!

Still working on my new theory of history, based around the release of the single "Crazy Bitch" by Buckcherry, and how it portended a new stupid epoch. I think I've got a synopsis, but it all started as a joke.

Imagine getting buttmogged by zoomers while chinamaxxing and sunning your butthole. It's 3pm and only a matter of time before the HOA calls the cops and your lease is voided. You will be arrested nude from the waist to your Crocs. This is America, now.

I don't know what "vibecoding" is and the word enrages me.

@pftompkins.bsky.social not sure if you have seen this, which is real. I keep thinking about the car in Good Will Hunting: Port Of Call-Los Angeles...

Trying to focus up on an idea I have had, a musical based on Frauditors and SovCits, I'm going to need an orchestra for this, I think. I have a very rough early draft but I know nothing about the craft tbh.

I raked some of the yard today, then I got my birch rod from "Krampsmas" and made people reflect on misdeeds from the past year. We celebrate Toyotathon in the between time from Krampusnacht and Christmas, fyi. We put another Caganer and a Rav 4 in the nativity, sing carols about affordability, etc

A friend caught this mystical creature in a trailcam.

Writing a musical about SovCits.

I have made a huge mistake.

Thanksgiving is the worst, completely unnecessary, and should be replaced an event known as "Family Fight Night" which is entire families coming together, settle disputes the old fashioned way. With fists in the backyard, while a cellphone records the event to commemorate Uncle Todd's ass-whuppin'

Deleted first draft of 'Mother' by Danzig: Damn, I wish I wasn't a fumbler I'll rock you 'til the daylight comes Make sure you are smilin' and warm, I am everything, tonight I'll be your Danzig, I'll do such things to ease your pain Free your mind and you won't feel ashamed, oh, oh, MOTHER!

Must have been mid-afternoon I could tell by how far the child sized man's shadow stretched out And he walked with a purpose in his sneakers down the street He had many questions, like child sized men often do He said, "Tell me all your thoughts on Todd. Tell me is he even real?"

Before the internet intruded into everything, it was pretty nice to have to physically seek out information, but it was not all wine and roses. It wasn't like a McDonald's unless Mayor McCheese was looking at you crazy and you knew he could shank you at any moment. That was life.

At some point you need to ascertain that Operation Mindcrime is about the friends you made along the way and also about the Battle of the Falklands, both can be true simultaneously. I speak with authority because I am humble, and my hair is spectacular.

I was just struck by the realization that the album 'Psycho Circus' by KISS was an allegorical work about alien abduction. Now to search for deeper meanings in the works of Buckcherry.

So JD Vance is a "DL Homie" to use "street slang" and keep it one hunned?

I wish I could explain the creative impulse.

*stepping up to the microphone at the National Spelling Bee* "Pete Bootyhole" "That is incorrect, please spell the word we give you, do not sing or talk about "Newsfails" or expounding at length about interdimensional beings."

A story of diplomacy

Reading discussions about COVID response, and I remember when my dad caught it and died, because the state we were in reopened early and people did not have to mask and there was very little camaraderie or public interest in responsibility. The state did not care. I will not forget or forgive that.