not Girls making me have an actual significant emotional breakthrough. I need a therapist so fucking bad dude lol
TincturedCanoid
@stellarinvolute.bsky.social
"The" trans-clamberer of the Haringey environs / Professionalised book "Freak" of little renown and mild esteem / 'Enjoys' "raving"
Feeling very lucky to have seen Sarah Kane's Cleansed staged pre- and post-transition, ten years apart. Difficult to think of anything that quite like that re presents to me the most intense moments of my life, or maybe just the intensity that has run under it all this whole time
Fucking in the toilets at the JK FLESH gig >>>
Oh my god her Airbnb is literally at the end of my street. As in, down the road from me
TincturedCanoid@stellarinvolute.bsky.social · 2w agoCompletely forgot that every tenth time I take Elvanse I fall powerfully and irreproachably in love with the first beautiful stranger I get a good riff going with. Which is why my +1 to tomorrow's bday drinks in the park is a woman named Olive visiting from San Francisco (I am in love with her)
I'm (obviously) all for holding those we are in community with to political and interpersonal standards of respect / (meaningful) allyship / w/e, but the way some of you/us (trans dykes) talk about / behave towards / project onto / look down on 'tme' people is fucking crazy lol
Completely forgot that every tenth time I take Elvanse I fall powerfully and irreproachably in love with the first beautiful stranger I get a good riff going with. Which is why my +1 to tomorrow's bday drinks in the park is a woman named Olive visiting from San Francisco (I am in love with her)
It's so funny, in discovering how you've been described to others by someone who used to treat you poorly, to realise only in retrospect that said person's capacity for interpersonal compassion really is entirely dependent upon a narrow sense of personal entitlement
The way this is one of the best books ever written. Like
Became so agitated w excitement about my date tonight that my coworkers sent me home an hour early 👍👍👍👍👍
55. Try / Dennis Cooper But this is the best book Cooper ever wrote - to have emotions this blistering held suspended in absolute adolescent incomprehension and dissociation, and for love to flicker underneath it all for all that, is uhhhhh absolutely shattering
53. Chelsea Girls / Eileen Myles The book about dykehood I have always wished existed - it does. Need to reread imminently, can already feel episodes of my life bubbling into the kinds of shapes offered up by Myles
OK if I pull off this thing I'm writing for the next issue of Screwed then I will consider myself oscillated beyond the pale
TincturedCanoid@stellarinvolute.bsky.social · 4w agoDJed for the first time tonight in a room full of friends at my fave night in the city and got booked for another night immediately afterwards I will never die
DJed for the first time tonight in a room full of friends at my fave night in the city and got booked for another night immediately afterwards I will never die
More or less am sure that feeling so ravenously passionate about someone that you would chew dirt for them is one of the top three points of being alive (Barthes gets it: read A Lover's Discourse). And, what's even better, it can and in fact never does go wrong
Rediscovered my affection for trans women by getting really, really into Nymphowars this month
you know when you're crashing out and it gets to where you hit a pitch of emotional impulsivity that can only really be described as a 'flow state'. this is where we can best locate obvious instances of 'high agency behaviour'
Finally saw Red Rooms and although it was exactly the snuffautist flick I hoped it would be no one had warned me that it would have an Ada Rook and a Uboa needle drop my review is as follows 'I loved this picture'
51. Zipper Mouth / Laurie Weeks Disaster dykehood so far beyond the point of no return that it stops being funny, then starts being funny, then stops, then starts again etc. The glimmering trundling turn and swirl of psychosis from sentence to sentence. Want to read it again but backwards this time
If you ever feel sleighted by an enemy please remember that you can restrain and then banish their soul to hell for eternity by just putting them into a story. Literally just immortalise them in the least charitable light possible it's so easy, they'll be a loser forever
your late 20s are about finally arriving into your self, however fragmented that self may turn out to be, and are also about finetuning the interior/exterior balance of chemicals that will firmly lock in the exact age at which your heart is going to explode