Anthony
@t0nybgoode.bsky.social
i love you, but don’t touch me. *Published model* *Published poet* A renaissance man of sorts. *Aspiring novelist* All Black 🥷🏾everything.
I can't wear a durag in public, but they can bring a golden retriever in Whole Foods and say that's their child.
White folks are different. This lady went around asking, “Is anybody allergic to cats?” I said, “Me.” She goes, “Oh… that might be a problem. I’m bringing cupcakes, and my cat’s hair might be in them.” Baby… I thought y’all were bringing an office cat.
My mom will take her sweet time answering my calls and texts but let it be the other way around. One day, I missed a call and a text message, I get a notification of an incoming email. Girl, dun turned into Liam Neesons.
Me listening to “Love On Top” for the first time. Beyoncé kept changing keys, and I needed a new wig for each one.
It ’tis I, Unc with the good puss. Arthritis in the knees, youth in the coochie.
The only creek white people should be quiet on is Lake Lanier.
Today, they were asking who wears a size 29, as far as men. Because they were giving away a pair of pants. And I go, "I do." And my straight male coworker goes, "Nah, yo you kinda bulky back there." And the two other straight guys agree. "yeah, yeah he right." So what y'all really saying?
I just completed the background check for my new job. It's official and I have more disposable income than usual. I win, they lose.
My friend asked me if I liked her outfit and I told her, we gotta stay quiet on the creek.
Explosive diarrhea from the lettuce? Bottoms, this is your January 6th.
Can they really not take dick? Or do they just not feel safe enough with YOU to take YOUR dick, because you feel like someone they have to survive...
