Amazing how even eight years of lounging in air-conditioned rooms and being fed organic free-range pâté from a can three times a day could not stamp out The Instinct…

Conventional wisdom: Leave turtles alone when they’re in their nesting box and never disturb them, they won’t lay their eggs if someone’s around My ten-year-old turtle who has only ever known me all her life: *completely ignores my presence and casually poops out eggs while I garden beside her*

The previous homeowner left behind a gorgeous antique that would have been a shame to get rid of but was impractical for dining or coffee table or desk purposes. So I stuck some plants on there, let’s see if I can keep them alive 🥹

My favorite scene was definitely the sirens, I just thought that whole sequence was so beautifully done. How you see them only as you would in dreams of a faraway shore… And the monologue!!! “It was the song of all the promises I failed to keep. And it told me I don't really want to go home.” 😫👌🏼

Girl when the gates of Troy were flung open to reveal Agamemnon and the audience, including me, cheered… The aura was unmatched, I’m sorry to say 💀

POV: The sun is rising, the score is 0-0, it’s a weekday and you are no longer in your twenties

Unfortunately I must support my team through thick and thin, win or lose, so waking up at the ass-crack of dawn for a third-place humiliation ritual here we go 😭✊🏼🇫🇷

Happy 8th birthday, Darth Pancakes! You are a very spoiled cat with a bad temper and you spend every waking moment plotting my demise, but that’s okay because I love you! 🥰

At least we all know that the third-place showdown memes will be UNMATCHED 😭

The match hasn’t even started yet and these two countries are just screaming their national anthems at each other lmao I am sat 🍿

LET’S GO PENINSULAR WAR

It tears through my head, does it haunt you too?

One step closer to an aesthetic kind of life

What is a sibling group chat during World Cup season if not the occasional Peninsular War reference persevering

I made this story for laughs but actually can someone who’s more fluent in cat please tell me what his body language is saying 🥹

I shall name them Balerion and Meraxes and I shall get a third plant and name it Vhagar 🥰

Please be very quiet she is Hunting

This has been the most shocking and drama-filled month of my life I love the World Cup!!!

Held a little housewarming party and Pancakes was Having None Of It

What in the Treaty of Tordesillas

“You were always the fracture inside me.” Have at it, my beloved UK readers!!! Manifesting for you all!!! 💖 www.netgalley.co.uk/catalog/book...

Bought this place on the spot because I fell in love with what it could be 🫶🏼

Anyway here’s my cat absolutely despising the new home I bought for him with my blood, sweat, and tears

Went down to the hotel casino for the free-flowing coffee and the security guard blocked my path and hit me with the “Ma’am how old are you?” I was incredibly flattered, behold a legitimate under-21 y’all 😌❤️

I kinda don’t even want to watch Mexico vs SoKor because this is a match between best friends and it was very cruel of FIFA 😔 However, the SK team are wearing floral hoodies over their lavender kits and it is the most Hongdae thing ever, I appreciate it 🤌🏼

I asked my Canadian friend if she was watching the game and she said “No, did we lose again?” 😭

Absentmindedly blurted out “I kinda fuck with Croatia’s playing style” half a second before Musa did That and now I think @sun-and-stars.bsky.social is never going to let me speak again

Me: “I need to buy a dress for my friend’s wedding, this is her palette, which color should I go with?” Him: “You’d look so sexy in any of those 😍” Babes he did not actually answer the question but somehow he passed the test??

“The stars guide me home to your heart.” One last Waterstones exclusive to cap off the HURRICANE WARS series 🥹🫶🏼 This beautiful sprayed-edge edition of THIS SHATTERED TEMPEST launches October 8th in the United Kingdom, but you can preorder it now at www.waterstones.com/book/this-sh... ✨

I wanted to know if Ancient Roman streets were wide or narrow but I got autocorrected and the AI consequences were absolutely devastating