…dammit Dani. You idiot…

“I'll have two number 9s, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number 7, two number 45s, one with cheese, and a large soda”

𝘈𝘶𝘨𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝕸𝖎𝖑𝖑𝖊𝖗@rockinginaugust.bsky.social · 10mo ago

"I'm going to McDonald's-"

// Joking aside, I’m a very chill person and it doesn’t offend me personally. But I can see how it can come off and how it can affect others Also being mistaken for once is funny. Twice is okay pushing it a bit but it’s okay. Third time? YOU’RE PUSHING YOUR LUCK SCOOB

// Joking aside once again, one time Dani was called Chocolate Flash back on Twitter and I’m like …okay. Appreciate the enthusiasm, but I don’t think Dani would like that?

“Sadly, you get used to some of it. …well, not used to it. At least you got the right superhero family. I looked up Harriet Bree. She’s….well, I mean I guess she’s got lightning. But she doesn’t even go here”

BART ALLEN@impulsivespeedster.bsky.social · 10mo ago

❝ Oh, what could it be? Such an unsolvable mystery... ❞ He misses being able to run off to scream hia frustrations out mid conversation. ❝ Like... You literally have completely different hair textures, skin tones, facial features and uniform styles and colours. Racism is one hell of a drug, gee. ❞

I didn’t kill Thawne physically but I think I killed him emotionally. I’d feel bad but…nah. Walk it off pal. Chin up.

// that actually happened in RP once. I laughed it off but come on now. They don’t all look alike. I’m watching you, lol

At least it’s not like that time I got mistaken for Harriet Bree Gee. I wonder what could have possibly be the common denominator that folks keep messing up.” looks at the camera and cracks her knuckles “GEE. I /WONDER/.”

BART ALLEN@impulsivespeedster.bsky.social · 10mo ago

The way Dani and Jenni look literally nothing alike—

Except I know you won’t. Ironically you can’t. And you know you can’t. And that pisses you off. All you can do is make his life hell because deep down, you’re a sad pathetic dependent loser. Without him, you’d lose all purpose in life. What’s next? Run back to the future? The future where -c-

……I swear to god if you’re mistaking me for Nora Allen or Jenni Ognats, I’m beating your ass like I beat Blitzen’s ass during the council of Flash meetings.

Hello, you red eyed banana suit wearing blippin blurge sucking shrap smellin’ pixel face

FLASH FACT! Injecting yourself or drinking speedster blood does not make you a speedster. It doesn’t work that way. Also what the shrap

FLASH FACT! If you’re a speedster & you lost your powers, please don’t douse yourself in chemical, inject yourself with hummingbird DNA, light a cigarette & smoke, while leaning on even more chemicals, & get yourself struck by lightning There is a 99.999999% chance that it won’t work & you’ll die

“Oh. I forgot to explain the train thing.”

“Oh. You’re a Barry? I’ve met a few of you. …mostly blonde ones though. ..although come to think of it, there was one who looked like you from a musical Earth. Man sung every word he said. Took a while to get used to but he seemed pretty chill.”

Totally understand that. Regardless, there is a reason why we didn’t work out. First of all, he was trapped in a youthful body forever but was technically old enough to be my dad. And he also shared existence with the entire Marvel…or Shazam family. And Black Adam. So all in all, it was a mess.

Might out of spite now

First of all, he and I are in the past. Second of all, I’m hilarious. Third of all, I don’t need your approval or permission. Not that I would.

“Yes, my dad is a hyper focused science nerd who’s a fanboy and loves trains. I know what you’re gonna say and that’s a stereotype. Shame on you… …I mean, you’re right. He is though.”

Well, I am from the future but I’m not your daughter. Also not your future. Time travel and multiverse rules can be a blippin’ mess sometimes. My father does work at STAR Labs though. In the future. He helped reinvent the train system. All inspired by The Flash, of course. Dad’s a bit of a fanboy

Uhhhhhhh… Ahem. Technically yes

This is almost as awkward as the time someone called me Jenni.

“I’ve been taking singing lessons. My singing instructor has a look of fear every time we meet. I’m sure that’s a good sign.”

Nyoom nyoom

// Dani has made a background cameo recently but I forgot what comic it was from. It may have been a preview.

“I mean technically I’m from a possible future. And I haven’t really made any appearances since… …wait what’s that? …background cameo? Where?”

“Nope.” vibrates and phases through a wall

“……Why are you saying that with such intensity? Also take a few steps back, doc. You’re a little close.”

This is true

// I actually typed that out, closed my eyes for a bit, and when I came back in like Where was I going with this? I can’t remember. Hit send anyways