BREAKING: exclusive video is leaked of the Belgium soccer team putting Donald Trump in a garbage can and taunting him with his own dirty diapers after the USA's humiliating World Cup loss. #DonaldTrump #Belgium
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Live look at Donald Trump and his mistress Natalie Harp, getting ready for their weekly Wednesday night date-night. #DonaldTrump #NatalieHarp
Move over Anna Nicole Smith, there's a new blonde gold-diggn' hose-b*g with an obsession for decrepit old fossils, in town. #DonaldTrump #NatalieHarp
BREAKING: President Trump reveals to reporters that the secret to finally eradicating the algae from the reflecting pool was "filling it with the tears of all the young girls [he] r*ped." #DonaldTrump #ReflectingPool
Now, explain this to me like I'm a 9-year-old: just how in the holy fuck did we let this ridiculous TOOLBAG become most powerful man on earth?
As it turns out the reflecting pool is just an extension of himself: one huge overflowing container of never-ending shit. #DonaldTrump
BREAKING: behind closed doors, Trump cabinet members are complaining that anything in the White House that's moist and largely exposed to the sun, winds up growing moldy green algae. #StephenMiller
BREAKING: President Trump signs historic "Memorandum of Understanding" treaty with the Lincoln Memorial reflecting pond algae. #DonaldTrump
BREAKING: Trump blames Obama for inexplicable green algae growth, that appeared on new Boeing 747-8 jet for Air Force One that the Qatari government 'gifted' him, one day after he unveiled it to the public. #DonaldTrump
BREAKING: President Trump orders surprise drone strike on the Lincoln Memorial reflecting pool in a last ditch effort to kill the massive growth of green algae. #DonaldTrump
BREAKING: DC workers discover source of unprecedented green algae growth in the Lincoln Memorial reflecting pool. #BarronTrump
BREAKING: after workers poured thousands of gallons of Hydrogen Peroxide into the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool failed to kill the rapidly growing algae, President Trump orders city workers to use Sulfuric acid instead. #DonaldTrump #ReflectingPool
BREAKING: as a condition of accepting the United States' unconditional surrender, Iranian President Masoud Pezeshkian required President Trump to dress as a "little school girl" while signing the deceleration of peace. #DonaldTrump #Surrender
I don't think the Lincoln Memorial reflecting pool is very happy with what Trump did to it. #DonaldTrump #ReflectingPool
RIP Mark Rothko. You would have loved how the hydrogen peroxide bleach is only turning the Reflecting Pool blue around the perimeter
BREAKING: Donald Trump sends Secretary of State Marco Rubio out to the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool to prove that the water is "perfectly safe and beautiful and clean. Unlike what the fake news and Dumocrats are saying." #DonaldTrump #ReflectingPool
