you have all been duped. there is no such thing as a phone
corn muffin
@verylowenergy.bsky.social
we need to talk about the the behavior of your hideous children . they are alwys acting out, singing their little songs all night, throwing rocks at cars ect. but the y have good hearts, we all know it. just look at the hot dish young Squidney made the oth
just thought of a great comeback i should have used in an argument that happened 12 years ago
i'm being rolled in thin sheets of dough to create a flaky crust
the mysterious palace just makes me feel so emotional
dwarf fortress bugs@dwarffortressbugs.bsky.social · last wk.[0013123] Crash when visiting Mysterious Palace
emotional maturity is knowing that bass players are the hottest musician
in 2036 companies don't steal your data with apps and AI they send a guy to tickle you until you tell them everything
i'm buying up all the infected salads now that they are on sale
the dialect survey got me with the potato bugs and crawdads. doxxed by crustaceans
It's 2006: I eat only spicy nacho doritos and energy drinks. Tummy: Cool. Easy. It's 2016: My diet is mostly cheap whiskey and tater tots. Tummy: No problem. It's 2026: I eat a balanced home cooked meal but have the audacity to follow it with a miniature ice cream sandwich. Tummy: Fuck you. Die.
poop lettuce disease can't hurt me, i already have IBS
wildfire smoke has arrived, the sky is the color of a dive bar urinal
every day i wake up and check if any politicians have died
damn i knew i shouldn't have put "good with people" on my application for the swamp hermit position
me and E.T. the extraterrestrial would have killed Jimothy with hammers, i'll tell you that much
if they gonna be force age verification then you should only be able to use the internet between the ages of 28 and 33
sorry dude, i can't meet you at the bar. the enemies there are too high level for me
it's crazy that we have two holes for hearing, two holes for smelling, two holes for seeing and only one for eating food
wow, the Borg just un-assimilated me and left the planet. it's probably because of my swag
i'm at the neighborhood authentic Mexican food counter and this lady is getting mad because they won't make her a breakfast burrito with only egg whites
i made a fool of myself in front of my friend's dad quoting an incorrect frank zappa fact
another day laying golden eggs that get taken by The Man
haven't been posting much because i've been deep in the woods worshiping the devil
i would love to burst out of a pie and surprise you some day
[seeing a metaphor] hell yeah. I love this like a pig loves slop
taking notes from Phillip Glass on how to get art done
if god wanted us to have additional pylons we would have been constructed with them
stealing jam packets from the diner to dump into the pot of Forever Soup bubbling on the hearth at home