Will

@willcrain2.bsky.social

Maybe we should have stopped after Friendster.

I found this baby cardinal in my backyard the other day. Ma and Pa Cardinal shrieked at us, but my wife got baby into a plant container and put it back in its tree. Can’t stop thinking about it.

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Since I first heard them as a kid, I have hated the Grateful Dead. Over the years, I have grown to appreciate the culture they created, and over the years I have met many Deadheads who are absolutely wonderful people, but I still can’t stand to listen to that band.

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My wife and I play an online game called Worldle, in which you must identify a country based solely on its outline. It’s a source of shame for us that we are so bad at identifying countries in Africa. But here’s the thing: We don’t work for the State Department.

Online post from Reuters Africa showing a slide from a U.S. State Department presentation which shows a map of Africa, singling out six countries, all of which are misidentified.

These are all the versions of The Odyssey my family has in the house. The Oliver is the one that gets all the buzz these days, but obviously the one that’s most faithful to Homer is the Godzilla.

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Some big name director needs to make a film version of Madeline Miller’s “Song of Achilles” ASAP. It will make a certain billionaire’s head explode.

Maybe the first thing I noticed when I first hear the Strokes was the compression-distortion on Julian Casablancas’ voice. He has stuck with that sound throughout their career. So, why am I so distracted by all the autotune-distortion on the new album?

Think about it: 3,000 years of human beings getting tears in their eyes when they hear about the old dog Argos recognizing his master and then dying.

A guy dropped off a package delivery on this 94F day. As I brought it inside, I smelled something odd. At first, I thought food inside the package was cooking in the heat. Brought it up to my nose. No, I know what that smell is: The delivery driver must’ve been smoking a ton of weed in the truck.

A photo of an ICE thug slipping on Minnesota ice this past winter, seen reproduced on a T-shirt in San Francisco this summer. Last week, ICE killed someone in Houston. Today, ICE killed someone in Maine. From north to south, from sea to sea, Americans despise this agency.

Photo of a T-shirt that features a reproduction of a famous photograph of an ICE agent slipping and falling on ice in Minneapolis.

So, what’s your theory: Why are Widow’s Bay, The Bear and Margo’s Got Money Troubles nominated for Best Comedy at the Emmys? Are we not making enough good comedy-comedies these days, and so the Emmys must pad the list with comic-drama hybrids?

I was prepared for the bros defending Platner over the past couple days, but I’m really bummed out by the women defending him today in my Facebook feed. Yikes.

I’m staying at my elderly parents’ house where they are glued to MSNOW (or whatever it’s called) for hours every night. Having the TV on like this annoys me, but I feel so lucky it’s not Fox.

Just thinking about a law school friend who, as recently as 6 or 7 years ago, argued that the SCOTUS majority — even Alito —made its decisions based on their good faith interpretations of the law, and not on whatever the Republican Party wanted.

Read all this political analysis, hand-wringing, celebration and worry and then you see that turnout was just over 20% in a congressional district, meaning we’re talking about a few thousand people in one state. Let’s everybody calm down a bit, OK? Everybody.

1. I don’t think anyone should be a trillionaire. 2. If there must be a first trillionaire somewhere in the world, that person is almost certainly going to be bad. 3. Surely that person does not have to be as bad as this.

Today I learned that, in 1957, just a year after he won the Palme d’Or for his classic short film “The Red Balloon,” Albert Lamorisse created the classic board game Risk.

Watching the Obamas’ speeches from yesterday, I remember that we have had it so much better than what we’ve got. And more painful than that: I realize that one of the things we’ve lost over the past 10 years is the belief that we *deserve* better than what we’re getting.

Yesterday on here, a writer I respect suggested I was “rattling my teacups” and feeding the narrative that anti-MAGA people are out-of touch elitists if I complained about the UFC match on the White House lawn and at the Lincoln Memorial. Today I see that: 1. Polls show more than 80% of Americans…

I hope someone can get the data and see how many Americans are watching a livestream to get the old creep’s name taken off the Kennedy Center vs. how many Americans are watching the World Cup.

1950s TV personality The Amazing Criswell was a flamboyant weirdo who loved hearing the sound of his own voice as he made predictions that would never come true. He ended up in Ed Wood’s notorious movie “Plan 9 from Outer Space,” but he had the skills necessary to be the world’s first trillionaire.

Photo shows 1950s TV personality Jeron 
Criswell King (The Amazing Criswell) in the 1959 movie “Plan 9 from Outer Space”