Andy Beckerman

@andybeckerman.bsky.social

I host the Beginnings & Couples Therapy podcasts. TV writer. Former philosophy professor. Casiopop king. Figuring out dystopia.

It says something about the American political consciousness that a movie about the government controlling your body and surveilling the chemicals your brain produces ends in a flirty romcom and not a basket full of decapitated heads.

me: the simpsons have four fingers on each hand so you’d think they’d live in a base 8 society but as far as I can tell there’s no evidence of that in the show my wife: *screaming during labor* the obgyn: hold on i want to hear more about this

Hold on, you’re telling me the US gestapo - made up primarily of violent domestic abusers - that in their official capacity rounding up innocent people to send to concentration camps, these otherwise unquestionable paragons used *racial slurs*?? These— Ow, fuck shit I just pulled my sarcasm muscle.

A screencap of the LA Times article about how ICE used slurs in their text messages… quel suprise

The biographies of 98% of the Nazis that survived WWII read like “Jurg Schleichman AKA “The Living Abattoir” spent one day in jail before being recruited by the CIA to train death squads in Central America. He successfully sued the UK gov’t for he back SS pay & died in 1992 surrounded by loved ones”

On one hand, it’s distressing that the government drafted an official enemies list filled with mainstream politicians, journalists & other prominent center-left people, after having already built a network of concentration camps. On the other hand, oh look, another list I didn’t make it on to.

Gambling is taking America by storm! Whether it’s using Polymarket to bet on the date ICE will just morph into a roving death squad or rolling the dice on crippling diarrhea by eating a sprig of broccoli, America can’t enough of every moment of existence becoming a terrifying wager!

The 21st century is going pretty well. I can't breathe the air, eat a salad or even get a minor bug bite without the possibility of getting badly sick, but I *can* watch 300,000 clips of two people in a generic room talking into microphones.

Rob Reiner was murdered in December, and half a year later, people are still writing fond thoughts about his work and his life. Lindsey Graham's death was immediately met with jokes by most and half-hearted, insincere treacle from his allies. By next week, all that will be left of him is a punchline

I was kidding with Naomi and said there are as many comedies about golf on TV as there are comedies with majority black casts, but then I looked it up and that's actually true and soon there will be more shows about golf on TV than comedies with majority black casts.

A screencap of a headline from the AV Club about how Netflix is greenlighting yet another show about golf

Listening to a playlist of "Hits of the 1950s", and they've got some real bangers! "Hot 14-Year-Old", "Car Go Fast", "Sexy 15-Year-Old", "Can't Wait to Be a Housewife and Nothing More", "Smokin' 16-Year-Old", and of course "A Soldier I Knew Died in Korea and I Stole His Name and Now I'm an Ad Exec"

I don’t have a ton of optimism about this human project of ours, but certainly dampening my spirit is the fact that LA is on fire 90% of the year, and *still*, every July 4th, vast amounts of firework-loving dullards are like, “How do we up that percentage to 187% of the year?”