My gender is whatever my wife finds hottest in a given moment/whatever she tells me it is, actually

I should play Slayyyter way too loud in the car on the way home

These are introductory rates. I'm trying this out not so offering three slots. Respond or DM if interested. I'll get a fancy graphic made up later on, just taking this as a sign to make the move. Max words 5k for now. May decline if you hit a hard limit I didn't think to exclude.

non verbal command “undress now” #rkgk #sketch

„kneel and spread your legs“

L⚢N@lesbianbajeena.bsky.social · last wk.

non verbal command “undress now” #rkgk #sketch

Lately my wife and I have been going out to places where she can write/draw while I read, enjoy a bevvie, and serve her tea. It’s so so so peak. Nothing tickles my brain quite like skillfully preparing a cup of tea exactly how she likes in public settings

Yall I think they gave me PMDD, this shit sucks

My wife won’t stop ramming her meat in my mouth without consent (she’s making me eat bites of her lunch)

Explaining chicken shit bingo to people makes me feel like a madman

Googles “bald cap for my pussy so my pubes don’t get caught in the latex catsuit’s zipper again” send skeet

Sleep fixed me 👍

24+ hour shifts are awesome for pay and free time but so brutal. I don’t think I could go back to doing one of these per week like I used to 😭

Oh that’s buggy blurry vision. That’s sleep deprivation buggy. Oh dear.

I’m so tired someone pls inject espresso directly into me

Guy in a Corinthian helmet pointing behind him, mouth agape, at a giant wooden horse as the thumbnail for a video entitled "FREE HORSE UNBOXING"

“Or whatever” added on after saying something nice and sappy to someone is actually how bugs show affection btw

*someone comments on another body feature I thought was normal* *googles it* *discovers it’s also associated with EDS, Autism, etc* Awesome 🫠 wow. The shit that’s wrong with me rly is written all over my body for anyone in the know to read like an open book, huh?

At the point of my shift where I sit around and try not to doze off for the next 6.5 hours sooooo confess something or ask something in the comments?

me as a fox dipping by head in a big vat of tiramisu then looking up with my face covered in cream and trying to sneak away innocently

WHEN I INTRODUCED MY WIFE TO IT!!! Recently learned she’ll go into the pantry and steal a little bit with a tiny spoon sometimes. I had no clue she’d fallen THAT in love with it ehehehe

🔞 Sketch@sumiaou.bsky.social · last yr.

made this for my bf who tried lao gan ma for the first time and we ended up needing to buy another jar the next day

getting a list of triggers and commands to build into a girl at camp from her owner the owner doesn’t do hypno and doesn’t have the behavioral conditioning skillset I do so this got me to thinking… did you get a girl with factory setting, or maybe a used one with some things you don’t care for?

No i mean im going to turn you into a milking cow. Now get in the fucking car

Bug 🪲@apupcalledbug.bsky.social · 2w ago

“After I’m done with you your face will be on a milk carton!” Ok, grandma, get with the times. They’re putting the faces of defiled girls on Prime now as a new initiative to boost floundering sales. Nobody’s done the milk carton thing in decades.

“After I’m done with you your face will be on a milk carton!” Ok, grandma, get with the times. They’re putting the faces of defiled girls on Prime now as a new initiative to boost floundering sales. Nobody’s done the milk carton thing in decades.

Secret Mean Domme Bug Who Laughs At me So Much

Bug is the meanest person in the universe and i am not kidding.

Bug 🪲@apupcalledbug.bsky.social · 2w ago

It’s good to be mean to dogs btw. You know the kind I mean.

It’s good to be mean to dogs btw. You know the kind I mean.

…accidentally salted myself Good thing I’m not a slug Phew

Good to remember that you can’t pirate it either. I remember in the early seasons of Thrones seeing HBO use the piracy numbers to boost their claim that it was the biggest show on tv, something they’ll do again if it helps. Watch something for adults instead.

Sean T. Collins@seantcollins.com · 2w ago

The push for Harry Potter the TV show is going to be completely enormous—they're debuting it on fucking Christmas—and it is the responsibility of TV critics to contextualize this as rewarding the world's most transphobic billionaire (which is saying something) in everything we write about it.

Breaking news: my tummy hurts a little bit

I usually drink my coffee black and my tea gong fu style but sometimes it’s really essential to get a coconut milk chai that’s a little spicy into my system as my daily caffeine, yknow?