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@armyoftoads.bsky.social

30+ year old who is just a bunch of memes and weasels shoved into a trenchcoat. Also a multi-fandom dumpster fire 🗑️🔥 https://archiveofourown.org/users/armyoftoads/pseuds/armyoftoads

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toilet bones@toiletbones.bsky.social · 6d ago

Found the email I sent when I got accidentally added to the faculty listserv of an orthopedic surgery clinic and nobody would remove me so I sent this email to all faculty/staff/med students and they removed me almost immediately

Hello Bone Colleagues, I have invented a new type of ankle and I'm very excited to show it to you. Early raccoon trials suggest a 60% increase in scurrying speed and dramatic increases in fine motor banditry. I know we are not supposed to create super raccoons, but I think you'll change your mind and professional ethics when you see how cute they are. I believe we are on the cusp of a new era in advanced human scurrying because if medical science has taught me anything, it's that improvements in raccoons correspond 1:1 to improvements in humans. -- [My name] Chief Bone Inventor Chair, Department of Foot and Leg Innovation Lord Mayor, Musculoskeletal Medicine Hartford HealthCare, The Bone & Joint Institute at Hartford Hospital.