when the people around you treat you like you’re less than dirt >>>>>

Have to walk home in the dark bc my dad doesn’t wanna pick me up lol.

therapy reaffirming my beliefs bc my therapist was like “yeah your friends are just living their lives, they’re not thinking about you” and shes right! i am not going to think about them either! not any fucking more.

i would rather be miserable than around people. i hate them all so much.

i literally am in so much emotional pain and distress all the fucking time and things are just. not getting better. i feel. so whatever.

i had an episode before a halloween party and truly want to die. and now im crying at work. lol.

i miss fanart and towa but if i go on twitter i might go insane. being on instagram again is already horrible LOL

genuinely thinking about subletting for a few months and wasting hundreds of dollars because being in this house is going to drive me to kms lol

im doing all the “right” things but my life will never change.

being healthy and doing the “good” thing is so hard. i tried texting 2 people today and i dont know if i like anyone anymore. i dont know if i ever want to be myself again or go back to how i used to be.

i shouldnt be this depressed during holidays bc i know ill get fomo eventually but i also. just. don’t know if i care that much anymore.

i feel like shit bc i’ve been in a bad depressive episode for over 2 months and feel like i’ve wasted them/a lot of 2026 but at the same time i really. really can’t bring myself to care. i still hate the people around me so much.

i don’t even know if this effort is worth it anymore. spending money on therapy, going on antidepressants, etc. my life is just always going to be like this. i wish i could just die

my life is never going to get better.

well i just received the worst news of my life so :) great.

i cant even hate omegaverse anymore like. i really cant even care anymore. its so common now its truly whatever

im kind of really dreading halloween and i dont think im ready to face the world but. 🙃

i won’t say names but thinking about this person i know who i ended up disliking. found out they worked for private equity, and then saw on linkedin they got a job at a gambling company. brags about their 6 figure job all the time, i’m sure they’re doing it now still

fujitowa route.......... #slowdamage

🩹❤️Towa🖤🩹 from Slow Damage❤️‍🩹 Commission for Menjo! Thank you very very much!!!!^^ #VgenComm #SlowDamage

ok pause on depression talk for a second i’ve been reading nrss and sasuke is listening to arctic monkeys #me

on the weekend at brunch we were talking about “ways to love” or whatever and i. just felt. so awful the entire time. like no i dont think being in constant communication is necessary but it just kept reminding me like. my best friend doesnt even remember my birthday and ditched me and i have to

im supposed to go to a halloween thing this weekend and im. really dreading it. lol. i dont. know if i want to see people. my bf keeps saying i should go and itll be better than i think but how can i get rid of the sinking feeling of my friends not being there for me and not showing up for me.

the pop art filter carried these but i like some of these photos i took during our trip. SAD is hard but i love fall.

i feel really awful that moving would solve a lot of my problems and also really bitter. again: i was never worth the effort to remember or put time into because i’m far. it really, really hurts

ok nvm i can’t think about it too hard or else i will start crying about how no one loves me agajn lol

i know that complaining about things just makes me feel worse but i also need to sort my feelings out sometimes which really sucks

ok. the first week of my antidepressant really sucked but im starting to feel. normal. ish. now. i think. i still get really upset and triggered by my life but well! i can’t fix it right now.

i think i feel a little better in that things that used to feel so horrible (ie: my family uses all my stuff and doesnt ask) dont feel like the worst thing in the world but i still feel so emotionally unstable. i havent burst into tears yet today but well its 4 more hours of being awake!

ive had anxiety attacks 4/5 days with this medicine on a low dose and its been really overwhelming lol but after having another anxiety attack in the car and my bf having to comfort me and stay over for another day im trying to talk to. some of my friends. kind of. maybe.