BJ Cobbledick
@bj-cobbledick.bsky.social
Brought to you in part by Mickey’s Malt Liquor
Returning lottery tickets to the store because they aren’t winners
I ain't have no money for a fleshlight so I stuffed a toilet paper roll with cold cuts and got it poppin'
Welcome to the stage, the Professor of Piss™, R. Kelly!
Eat lettuce, shit yourself until you die. Living the dream!
I’m pretty sure they clean this bathroom with a mop bucket full of piss
New Vajankle Chia Pet, grow the chia seeds where the pubic hair would be and on the toes.
Stuart Little in a sandwich but the bread is two glue traps
“You’ve got a personality like listening to fireworks on the radio”
There’s nothing more thrilling than listening to the theme song to CHiPs while blasting down the highway drinking Mickey’s Malt Liquor in your 1989 Camaro
“Hang a right the old Joe’s Crab Shack that’s now A+ #1 Crab USA”
Now That's What I Call Business 87.
It’s not drinking and driving if you only do it at red lights.
What in the world is in that bag? What you got in that bag?
Save money by drying your hands with printer paper you steal from work
This bitch got a laugh like a starter motor on a 62 Chrysler