The "Twin Towers" they hit were a decoy cause the government knew what was being planned. They just haven't gotten around to putting the real ones back yet
Recently saw the phrase "hit it Bognor Regis style" and it's been haunting me ever since. How the fuck do they hit it in Bognor Regis, what's special about it
Listen up liberals: I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel, I'm cold and I am shamed, lying naked on the floor. Illusion never changed into something real, I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn 😂
ME: I should go downstairs to get a snack and something to drink MY BRAIN: And nuzzle Yuko's fluff and give him kisses ME: Uh, yeah, obviously. That's included in the task. It's implicit
Belgian government's advice for people suffering from heat exhaustion is to go somewhere cool. Thanks brain geniuses
I wonder how often the Brits think about the fact their king was once secretly recorded telling his side piece (now their queen) he wished he was tampon so he could live inside her
Experiencing derision for my low precision circumcision (they can't see the vision and thought it was a poor decision)
I think it would help if I ate a bowl of plain white rice without using any utensils, just sticking my face in there like a pet eating out of its food dish. I don't know *what* it'd help exactly but it'd help something
The hit anime series "Would You Still Really, Really, Really, Really, Really Love Your 100 Girlfriends If They Were All Worms?"
Opeth had an incredible six album run so I'm post as though it was two three album runs they had back to back Still Life Blackwater Park Deliverance Damnation Ghost Reveries Watershed
Mia Murphy 🏳️⚧️@miamurphy.com · 4d agoWhat's the best three album run from a band? (the correct answer is Moving Pictures, Signals, and Grace Under Pressure by Rush, but I'm excited to learn second place)
Been walking around the house mumbling "Pepto abysmal" to myself like a vocal stim
Line I just read in Belgian news about US politics: "The chance the Democrats will pick another moderate presidential candidate is very high. They strongly fear that a left-wing candidate cannot beat the Republicans." It's literally the opposite 💀
[Metallica voice] LANDMINE Has taken my SIGHT Taken my SPEECH Taken my HEARING Taken my ARMS Taken my LEGS Taken my DICK Taken my BALLS Taken my ASS Taken my SHIT Taken my PISS Taken my CUM
My new OC is called Cloaca Carl. You can probably guess what his deal is... Yup, that's right. Libertarian.
The rain may not have cooled anything down, but at least it added some much needed humidity so I can get nice and sticky, everyone's favorite
It's gonna be a very long time before we get another summer this hot (I consider 10 months to be a long time)
Will I ever understand what it is that cis dudes get out of insisting nothing's wrong with them when the thing that's wrong with them is plain and obvious to everyone? Why are they always on some Monty Pyhton Black Knight "tis but a scratch" type shit
Did you know there's people who use Opera GX even though they're not sponsored by them? That's crazy
"Perfectly cut screams" is over. "Cumshot compliations" are over. I want a compilation of cumshots that cut off at exactly the funniest moment. Someone going "aaugh-" and the first rope gets about a third of the way out before it moves on to the next clip
Driving in my car, right after a beer Hey that car, is shaped like a beer