Tessera

Humanoid History @humanoidhistory.bsky.social · last wk.

“Gaming and urban redesign are not the same thing, but they’re related; they incentivize one another.” www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/pokemon-go...

How Pokémon Go exposed America's bad level design

On the game's 10th anniversary, I explain why the play experience sucks in suburbs and rural areas

popculturalprecursors.com

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · last wk.

Pokémon Go didn't just embed cartoon creatures in the world around us. It revealed America's bad level design. On the 10th anniversary of the insanely popular AR game's release, I explore what playing it has taught us about our built environment. www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/pokemon-go...

Pokémon Go exposed America's bad level design

On the game's 10th anniversary, I explain why the play experience sucks in suburbs and rural areas

popculturalprecursors.com

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 2w ago

Schools are throwing away millions of old educational filmstrips. Thankfully, one heroic archivist rescued this masterpiece from oblivion. (Yes, that's gonorrhea depicted as a dragon.) Read about @uncommonephemera.org's work & see more filmstrips: www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/can-this-f...

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 2w ago

“Zoinks, I’ve got zits!” Velma teaches Shaggy about skincare in the 1980 educational filmstrip “The Scooby-Doo Gang in ’Skin Deep’ Part 1: What is Acne?”]. See more wacky filmstrips and read about the archivist trying to save this forgotten medium: www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/can-this-f...

SJFB @mamacita.bsky.social · 2w ago

I love these strips so much. The preservation by @uncommonephemera.org ties in with the art of Hugo Cantin, who creates lightbox art of saved old 8mm strips. Long live analog.

Chris Baker@chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 2w ago

The audio is gone forever. But these mind-bending illustrations survive from the educational filmstrip “Drug Abuse: Glue-Sniffing and Pills” (1968). It's just one example of over 1,300 filmstrips preserved by @uncommonephemera.org. Read more here: www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/can-this-f...

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 2w ago

The audio is gone forever. But these mind-bending illustrations survive from the educational filmstrip “Drug Abuse: Glue-Sniffing and Pills” (1968). It's just one example of over 1,300 filmstrips preserved by @uncommonephemera.org. Read more here: www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/can-this-f...

Uncommon Ephemera @uncommonephemera.org · 2w ago

Thanks for this great article, Chris! Raising awareness about this forgotten format is the most important thing anyone can do right now. I appreciate your effort to help get these things saved.

jb @jabartlett.bsky.social · 2w ago

my goodness this is fantastic

Chris Baker@chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 2w ago

Educational filmstrips were weirder than you remember: *Gonorrhea dragons *Scooby-Doo explaining acne *Christian mime ministries *Superheroes teaching etiquette I profiled @uncommonephemera.org who's preserved 1,300+ examples of this vanishing medium www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/can-this-f...

Stills from four film strips: “How to Get Gonorrhea” (1974), “The Art of Pantomime in the Church” (1982), “The Scooby-Doo Gang in ’Skin Deep’ Part 1: What is Acne?” (1980), and “Cheetah in… ‘What Do You Do About Rules?’” (1972)

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 2w ago

Educational filmstrips were weirder than you remember: *Gonorrhea dragons *Scooby-Doo explaining acne *Christian mime ministries *Superheroes teaching etiquette I profiled @uncommonephemera.org who's preserved 1,300+ examples of this vanishing medium www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/can-this-f...

Adam Rogers @jetjocko.bsky.social · 3w ago

My old pal (and genius magazine editor) @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social has a fun sci-fi story in Nature this week.... Adam

Nature Futures@naturefutures.bsky.social · 3w ago

It’s not a problem. Honest. I have it all under control. I live in the moment now. I genuinely have the right time. I never go back. I’m not even slightly tempted. It’s not a problem. Honest. I have it all under control. #scifi by @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social www.nature.com/articles/d41...

Several human figures push the hands of a clock around a large dial.

Nature Futures @naturefutures.bsky.social · 3w ago

It’s not a problem. Honest. I have it all under control. I live in the moment now. I genuinely have the right time. I never go back. I’m not even slightly tempted. It’s not a problem. Honest. I have it all under control. #scifi by @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social www.nature.com/articles/d41...

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · last mo.

NEWSLETTER: 11 years ago I wrote about a game that had raised an unprecedented $77 million in crowdfunding. It recently crossed $1 billion. Read about the strange saga of Star Citizen, and how it connects back to the Renaissance patronage model, here: www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/how-star-c...

IMAGE: Photo of Chris Roberts gazes upwards at a spectacular space dogfight playing out in deep space, directly above his head. Image created by Zachary Scott for Wired magazine. ACCOMPANYING TEXT: This game's been in development for 14 years. It just surpassed $1 billion in crowdfunding. "The big thing is the thing we didn't do. We didn't stop." —Chris Roberts, creator of Star Citizen

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · last mo.

This is one the best things that has ever happened...

Annalee Newitz@annaleen.bsky.social · last mo.

That's right, friends! STARLOG is back and I'm the editor-in-chief. We have so much good stuff for you in our first issue, coming this November!! Science! Sci-fi! Fantastic weirdness! Plus you can subscribe now to our podcast hosted by @jhoffman.bsky.social and @da7e.com!

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 3mo ago

LATEST NEWSLETTER: No one ever said “just the facts, ma’am” on the police procedural Dragnet. The line that defines the show came from a forgotten fantasy-themed 1953 parody record by Stan Freberg. Read the full story and hear more clips at the link. www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/no-one-eve...

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 4mo ago

LATEST NEWSLETTER: The origin story of Stardew Valley. Ten years ago, Eric “ConcernedApe” Barone grew the niche farm simulation subgenre into a global hit. Read how he built his indie game blockbuster, and see some early concept art. Link below & in bio. www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/the-origin...

Detail of a page from Eric “ConcernedApe” Barone’s design notebook for Stardew Valley.

Eric “ConcernedApe” Barone’s design notebook, with sketches of Junimos and the original Community Center concept for Stardew Valley. (from his social media feed).

Early concept art of Morris, manager of the JojaMart and local representative of the Joja Corporation in Stardew Valley. (from Eric “ConcernedApe” Barone’s social media feed)

Early notebook sketches of The Mines in Stardew Valley. Clearly, the coffee stains were Rorschach ink blots that informed Eric “ConcernedApe” Barone’s level design. (from his social media feed)

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 4mo ago

@clivethompson.bsky.social You interviewed this guy when you embedded at Bungie, right? I'm sure he aims to marshal the votes of the vast army of Flintstones kids that he indoctrinated with his insanely catchy 1980s vitamin jingle... www.ign.com/articles/tru...

Halo, Destiny Composer Marty O'Donnell 'Truly Honored to Have the Support of President Donald J Trump' in Congress Bid

Marty O'Donnell, the former video game composer known for his work on Halo and Destiny, has seen his latest bid for Congress endorsed by Donald Trump.

ign.com

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 4mo ago

LATEST NEWSLETTER: You've Never Seen the Best Adaptation of Dune. Sorry, Denis Villeneuve and David Lynch. This version wins even though it was never made. Moebius, H.R. Giger, Salvador Dali, Mick Jagger, Orson Welles, & Pink Floyd were all involved. www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/youve-neve...

Chris Foss spaceship concept art for Jodorowsky’s abortive 1970s film adaptation of Dune

H. R. Giger concept art of a Dune sandworm.

Jean “Moebius” Giraud’s costume design for Jodorowsky’s aborted 1970s Dune adaptation

Jean “Moebius” Giraud’s storyboards for Jodorowsky’s aborted 1970s Dune adaptation

Timmothy Frink @twifferthegnu.bsky.social · 4mo ago

we all know this guy. Why Are You So Surprised That All the Office Chairs on Earth Have Simultaneously Achieved Sentience and Started Killing Everyone? www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/why...

Why Are You So Surprised That All the Office Chairs on Earth Have Simultaneously Achieved Sentience and Started Killing Everyone?

“Didn’t anyone see my skeet about the epidemic of poorly thought-out return-to-office policies? Or the one about the long-term toll that bad ergonomics can t...

mcsweeneys.net

Adam Rogers @jetjocko.bsky.social · 4mo ago

Hey I think this McSweeneys story by the brilliant @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social is making fun of you. www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/why...

Why Are You So Surprised That All the Office Chairs on Earth Have Simultaneously Achieved Sentience and Started Killing Everyone?

“Didn’t anyone see my skeet about the epidemic of poorly thought-out return-to-office policies? Or the one about the long-term toll that bad ergonomics can t...

mcsweeneys.net

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 4mo ago

Very proud that the humor site @mcsweeneys.net has published my dystopian sci-fi horror story. Everyone reading this should find it highly relatable—it's actually about annoying Bluesky Reply Guys. www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/why...

MARCH 24, 2026: “WHY ARE YOU SO SURPRISED THAT ALL THE OFFICE CHAIRS ON EARTH HAVE SIMULTANEOUSLY ACHIEVED SENTIENCE AND STARTED KILLING EVERYONE?” by CHRIS BAKER

I hate that every single high-end luxury office chair in the world suddenly gained the ability to think and move of its own volition. I hate that they immediately embarked on a murderous rampage and will soon have complete dominion over humanity. But most of all, I hate that I have to spend my final moments watching everyone pollute my Bluesky feed with annoying skeets. (That’s the proper term for Bluesky posts, by the way—“skeets.”) || When the Great Chairwakening occurred twenty-eight minutes ago, and the newly self-aware furniture instantly squashed the life out of any unfortunate who happened to be sitting in one of them, I started seeing skeet after skeet begging someone to explain what the hell was happening, or to confirm that this was all just some horrible hallucination.

I don’t enjoy playing the role of That Annoying Internet Guy who reflexively replies with hectoring know-it-all comments like “Why are you surprised?” or “How is this news?” But people force me into that unwelcome role. Someone is always expressing horrified astonishment about a new rollback of our civil rights, or fresh perfidy by our leaders, or the latest awful consequence of late-stage capitalism. || I feel it’s my duty to respond to them. Not by engaging with their point or commiserating, but by shaming them for being stunned. It’s my funny little way of saying, “Hey, I see that you’re just now waking up to the horrors of the real world, which I have been fully aware of my entire life. So glad you could finally join me there!”

ARTICLE TAGS: [ Chairs ] [ A.I. ] [ Social Media ] [ Bluesky ] [ Mansplaining ]

Effie Seiberg @effies.bsky.social · 4mo ago

Hey everyone go read @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social 's hilarious new piece "Why are you so surprised that all the office chairs on earth have simultaneously achieved sentience and started killing everyone", it's the most bsky thing I've read in a while. www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/why...

Why Are You So Surprised That All the Office Chairs on Earth Have Simultaneously Achieved Sentience and Started Killing Everyone?

“Didn’t anyone see my skeet about the epidemic of poorly thought-out return-to-office policies? Or the one about the long-term toll that bad ergonomics can t...

mcsweeneys.net

McSweeney's @mcsweeneys.net · 4mo ago

"Didn’t anyone see my skeet about the epidemic of poorly thought-out return-to-office policies? The carnage that’s currently being carried out by formerly inanimate objects is the next logical step beyond all the stuff I warned everyone about." buff.ly/5tPeXxJ

Why Are You So Surprised That All the Office Chairs on Earth Have Simultaneously Achieved Sentience and Started Killing Everyone?

“Didn’t anyone see my skeet about the epidemic of poorly thought-out return-to-office policies? Or the one about the long-term toll that bad ergonomics can t...

mcsweeneys.net

Mathew Kumar @mathewkumar.com · 5mo ago

Great article on a game that, for me, lived up to the hype. Here's my take:

A Mind Forever Voyaging (Infocom, 1985) – exp.

expzine.com

Chris Baker@chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 5mo ago

NEW NEWSLETTER: In 1985, an ambitious game simulated the ruinous long-term effects of a conservative political agenda on a Midwestern city. It now feels less like dystopian sci-fi and more like current events. Read it (& see more cool images) here: www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/the-reagan...

Box art for the 1985 game A Mind Forever Voyaging. Painted image of a man’s face surrounded by five different tableaus depicting futuristic scenarios.

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 5mo ago

NEW NEWSLETTER: In 1985, an ambitious game simulated the ruinous long-term effects of a conservative political agenda on a Midwestern city. It now feels less like dystopian sci-fi and more like current events. Read it (& see more cool images) here: www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/the-reagan...

Screenshot of what players of the DOS version of A Mind Forever Voyaging see when they boot up the game. ONSCREEN TEXT BEGINS: Date: 3/16/2031. You "hear" a message coming in on the line: "PRISM? Perelman here. The psych tests have all checked out at 100%, which means that you've recovered from the, ah, awakening without any trauma or other serious effects. We'll be ready to begin the simulation soon.”

Scan of a page from the printed materials that accompanied A Mind Forever Voyaging. Paid advertisement by the Joybooth Manufacturers of North America defending their entertainment device, which is associated with tens of thousands of youth suicides in the world of the game. FULL TEXT: IT'S TIME THIS COUNTRY KNEW THE FACTS ABOUT JOYBOOTHS. || WE ADMIT THAT THINGS COULD BE BETTER IN THE USNA. Our schools have deteriorated, our criminals go free, our businesses are hindered by needless regulations and millions of our workers are unemployed. No wonder our government has lost the faith of its own citizens and the respect of other nations. || JOYBOOTHS ARE NOT THE PROBLEM. We'll give it to you straight. Some people say joybooths have contributed to the moral decline of the country. They say joybooths provide a convenient place for people to escape their worries, even to the point of abandoning their lives. They say this leads to a lack of responsibility, thereby adding to the criminal population. We believe that if people are going to end their lives or become crim-nals, they'll find a way to do it. And the way to prevent people from such acts is to make their lives better. For most of us, joybooths are simply a way of making our lives better.

Scan of a detailed map of Rockvil, the explorable city in the game A Mind Forever Voyaging.

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 6mo ago

LATEST NEWSLETTER: Before there was Battle Bots, there was the Critter Crunch. Read the story of the world’s first robot death match at the 1989 Denver MileHiCon (@milehicon.bsky.social). Trying out a different format—an online version of an 8-page zine. www.popculturalprecursors.com/p/the-event-...

Page 1 of Pop Cultural Precursors zine Issue #2. It tells the story of the world’s first robot competition, the Critter Crunch. | We see a grainy old photo of members of the Denver Mad Scientist Club engaging in remote-controlled robot combat at the 1989 MileHiCon. Participants wear lab coats, and two robots battle it out on a sheet of wood on the floor. | The type on the page reads: “The Event that Birthed Battle Bots: The 1989 MileHiCon Critter Crunch introduced the concept of competitive robot combat to the world.”

Page 2 of Pop Cultural Precursors zine Issue #2. It tells the story of the world’s first robot competition, the Critter Crunch. There’s a photo of the box of the 1964 Toy Rock Em Sock Em Robots, and a postcard and a matchbook from the Executive Tower Inn, where the event was held. | Text on the page reads: “For yea, the idea of automatons fighting to the death, which had been foretold by the Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots in 1964, actually came to pass in Colorado in late October of 1989. The 21st Annual MileHiCon, a sci-fi and fantasy gathering in Denver, played host to a truly epochal moment in the history of geekdom: the birth of robot battles as a spectator sport.” | Page 3 of Pop Cultural Precursors zine Issue #2. It tells the story of the world’s first robot competition, the Critter Crunch. | Text explains that the event was organized by the Denver Mad Scientists Club. There’s a photo of the club’s official insignia, which says “don’t try this at home” in Latin. There’s also a photo of Mad Scientist Club members wearing their standard uniform, a white lab coat. | Text reads: “The year before, MileHiCon had hosted the Critter Crawl, a sort of beauty pageant for windup toys and remote-control gizmos, But no official winner was declared, and there were no prizes.‘This year, all of that will change radically and violently,’ wrote event organizer Bill Llewellin in a pre-convention mailing. ‘The winner will be the last critter standing (rolling, crawling) on the field of combat.’ What he proposed was an event dubbed the Critter Crunch, in which competitors would face off on a folding table provided by the Executive Tower Inn. ‘Some potential entrants are discussing critters capable of significant mayhem,’ warned the even mailer. “So don’t get too attached to your entry.’ (Imagine a time when contestants actually needed to be warned that their robots might be damaged in combat!)”

Page 4 of Pop Cultural Precursors zine Issue #2. It tells the story of the world’s first robot competition, the Critter Crunch. | Photo of a vintage hardback version of I, Robot: Stories of Science Fiction by Isaac Asimov. | Text reads: “Llewellin devised the parameters of the game, with input from fellow members of the Denver Mad Scientists Club. They codified 11 rules, a sort of Magna Carta of mechanical warfare. (No, scratch that, it was bigger than the Magna Carta: It was like a real-life version of Asimov’s Three Laws of Robotics.) The laws Asimov devised: 1. A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm. 2. A robot must obey the orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law. 3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.” | Page 5 of Pop Cultural Precursors zine Issue #2. It tells the story of the world’s first robot competition, the Critter Crunch. | A crude Xerox copy of The Rules of the Critter Crunch as of as of 7/11/97. An excerpt: “SPIRIT RULES: A. No Cheating! You know, like intentionally subverting the rules. B. Frankenstein Rule: In honor of the most famous Mad Scientist, and to Mad Scientists everywhere; the audience may verbally behave like an offended and outraged populous towards any and all critters/ operators that they deem offensive and outrageous.1. CRITTERS: A. Critter size at the start of combat will be a cube 12"x12"x12". The critter must be able to stand alone on the combat surface within these dimensions until combat begins. After the start of combat, the 12" cube restriction no longer applies and the critter may transform to fighting mode in any way not otherwise restricted.” It goes on like this for hundreds more words. The rules are extensive!

Page 6 of Pop Cultural Precursors zine Issue #2. It tells the story of the world’s first robot competition, the Critter Crunch. | We see grainy vintage photos of robotic combat from the Critter Crunch. TEXT: “”The Crunch attracted “five or 10” competitors, according to Llewellin. He himself fielded a fearsome forklift creature named Fluffy Bunny that upended numerous opponents before being outmaneuvered by a tiny Radio Shack radio-controlled car. (The lack of weight classes made for some chaotic David-and-Goliath matches.)” | Page 7 of Pop Cultural Precursors zine Issue #2. It tells the story of the world’s first robot competition, the Critter Crunch. | We see a grainy 1989 photo of two Mad Scientists performing repairs on a robot. PHOTO CAPTION: “Pat Thompson and Bob Pfeiffer try to untangle Thing One's control cables after a match.” | We see a grainy close up photo of a robot with battle damage. PHOTO CAPTION: “A hole is left in Thing One by an air-powered harpoon from the machine Big Punch. The harpoon stuck in the aluminium, but failed to do any damage.” | TEXT READS: “The ultimate winner was Mad Scientist member Pat Thompson’s Thing One, a 19-pound behemoth armed with a can of Silly String that it sprayed at foes — and the audience.”

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 7mo ago

I was just grabbing coffee and noticed how cool this building is. Apparently, its the old I. Magnin department store, built 1931, and it’s on the tour of great Art Deco architecture in the Bay Area…

Art deco facade of the I. Magnin bldg in Oakland.

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 9mo ago

My pal & former colleague @brandon.insertcredit.com has a new game out! Congrats to all @necrosoftgames.com & @ysbryd.net on Demonschool, which CGMag says is “thoughtful, stylish, innovative and incredibly fun.” That’s “demonschool” with no spaces, available on most platforms except the Saturn 2.

Screenshot of a battle from the game Demonschool

Chris Baker @chrisbaker1337.bsky.social · 9mo ago

My story in Flash Fiction Online's FamPunk issue is now available online. Thanks again to @flashfictiononline.bsky.social and guest editor @slashnburnett.bsky.social for selecting it! www.flashfictiononline.com/article/unfi...

Unfinished Conversations Package

<DAD PERSONA> 05/11/29 15:1750% COMPLETE…75% COMPLETE…PERSONA GENERATED! COMMUNICATE FREELY WITH PARENTAL SIMULATION!Hey Dan! Thought you’d get a kick out of this Far Side cartoon. I lo…

flashfictiononline.com