Oh you guys hooked up last night? Did he,,, give you his knucklebones ?
Panda Excess
@crimegrunkle.bsky.social
“I’m hardcore, Bill.” Art can be seen @snaildivorce on tumblr and insta
HOW CAN THERE POSSIBLY BE MORE TO SAY ABOUT DOWNTON ABBEY
Is everyone in this restaurant looking at me weird bc my tits are out? Yes. BUT. I am choosing to live in a reality where they’re all just obsessed with me
Just took a workshop on empathy and communication and one lady left yelling “I guess I’ll just do your job since you can’t!” at someone on the phone. Like girl get back in here!!! You did not listen!
Poem of the day is this broken clock at my office that’s permanently stuck at 4:58 pm. Severance core
call me Michael Bublé the way I’m laying on my boobs
Guy on Hinge opened with “I bet moms love you” not mine, girl!!
Showed my fiancée my new teddy bear (who admittedly has an orphan Annie vibe) and she hit me with “that looks like a bear you’d give someone who was dying”
My dad will give directions like “head east for a mile” like ok Sacagawea can you just tell me which Taco Bell it’s closest to
Cannot believe kissanime is still going. You truly can’t keep a bad bitch down
Just had to put away my phone at the bar bc someone was talking to me and I deadass was like 😡 my emails
If you’re ever having a tough time just know I’m always here to provide immoral support. Kill him
Anyway everyone go play the Detective Frog games they’re so good they cured my depression @gracebruxner.bsky.social
They’re playing Fergalicious? At the Promenade? How cosmopolitan!
Not responding to texts tonight, just found out my girl has been sending weavings to other maids
I went to the Dual Spires Annual Cinnamon Festival and all I got was threatened
Duchy, as a land title, is decidedly unsexy; but Barony? Mysterious. Rakish. Charming. Take me there posthaste
As you can see, the driver’s seat in my car is immaculately clean, whereas the seat where my passenger princess sits is full of devilry
Is there any consensus on when we should start referring to them as The Backstreet Men
It’s so wild that my hair got curlier after I went on birth control? That should be the implant’s slogan: “Your hair could look better or worse. But it WILL look different.”
A lot of english protagonists are Like That because they live on some rainy gray moor, and if they just went somewhere warm on vacation once they would be normal. Not Mr. Rochester. Not even Jamaica could fix him